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I have a wish.
Internal Administrator
Posted: Saturday, January 7, 2012 10:09 AM
Joined: 1/14/2015
Posts: 40463


Originally posted by: Jim Broede

Tonight I've been reading posts in the care-givers forum from care-givers who have been completely overwhelmed. Through no fault of their own. They have been burdened with far more than they can handle. Again, I emphasize, through no fault of their own. It'd sad. And I wish that there was some way that professional care-givers or social workers could step in. And relieve these overworked and over-traumatized care-givers of their overwhelming responsibilities. --Jim
Anonymous
Posted: Saturday, January 7, 2012 10:09 AM
Originally posted by: Jim Broede

I like love stories, Sheryl. And no two are the same. Yours is amazing. More amazing than mine. It's really an example of unconditional love. Of gutting it out. And to think, you are still smiling. By the way, when I married my Jeanne, she was divorced. And had two kids. A son, 8. A daughter, 12. Anyway, Jeanne was the best thing to ever happen to me. Although, there's some nice things happening now. Maybe just as good. Life takes some interesting twists and turns. Seems to me that you've survived. And that you have continued to thrive. Despite the pitfalls. Gotta give you credit. Thanks for sharing your story. Anyway, I'm in love again. And soon off to Italy. For the winter. Come to think of it. Maybe my story is even better than yours. Because still another chapter is unfolding. Life ain't over until it's over. You may have a long way to go yet, too. --Jim
Anonymous
Posted: Saturday, January 7, 2012 10:09 AM
Originally posted by: Jim Broede

Nice to hear that you've adapted, Sheryl. Before you became overwhelmed. You also seem to have accepted what's happening. And doing the best you can. I like your attitude. You seem to know that your husband has helped give you the best years of your life. I sense you are really in love. A love that has been nurtured for 42 years. I was with my Jeanne for almost 40 years. And as I reflect now, even the Alzheimer years proved to be rewarding. So much of Jeanne to savor. Even today. Her spirit lives. She taught me to savor life. Even when she was dying. Taught me to care. Really care. Taught me to love. Really love. --Jim
Anonymous
Posted: Saturday, January 7, 2012 10:09 AM
Originally posted by: SherylS

Jim: This board, just by being here and being a source of 'live' information from those going through it/have gone through it have helped me from the beginning. The first thing I learned was that not only do I have to keep him safe and warm and healthy, but I also have to Entertain him/stimulate the brain! What?

Through this board, from the beginning, I learned the importance of getting him started at an Adult Day Care Center while he's still viable. Don't wait too long I was told. He starts on Thursday. After 5 months of 24/7, it's not a day too early.

Imagine if I hadn't found these boards and tried to figure it all out by myself? How long might that have taken?

Therefore, many thanks to those who have already been there before me, for taking my hand and giving me guidance....before I became overwhelmed.
Anonymous
Posted: Saturday, January 7, 2012 10:09 AM
Originally posted by: SherylS

Jim: I was able to turn it into a 'positive' by explaining that a pair of pull ups under his briefs might be a good idea for an upcoming air trip to SoCal. Smiler

Off to WalMart we go today as I've read that theirs are the best for the buck.
Anonymous
Posted: Saturday, January 7, 2012 10:09 AM
Originally posted by: SherylS

quote:
Originally posted by Jim Broede:
Nice to hear that you've adapted, Sheryl. Before you became overwhelmed. You also seem to have accepted what's happening. And doing the best you can. I like your attitude. You seem to know that your husband has helped give you the best years of your life. I sense you are really in love. A love that has been nurtured for 42 years. I was with my Jeanne for almost 40 years. And as I reflect now, even the Alzheimer years proved to be rewarding. So much of Jeanne to savor. Even today. Her spirit lives. She taught me to savor life. Even when she was dying. Taught me to care. Really care. Taught me to love. Really love. --Jim


Are you talkin' to me? LOL

Sure, he was tall dark and handsome. I was a single mother with 2 kids who was smitten from the moment we met! However, his moods and fits of temper were a puzzle once the honeymoon was over.

We had 2 more kids with all the ups and downs of a new, young family. It wasn't until we were married 26 yrs and my only daughter had gone to college and became a nurse, then we had a new DIL who became a nurse, they named it for me ... he was bipolar! Thus, the mood swings and the unexplained silent treatments that went on for 5 days at a time! Ah Hah!

The kids were grown and gone. I no longer had the pressure to stay. I had a good job and, unlike the early years, I could support myself. I told him to get help or I was over it. He did. It was a bit rocky at first but he did do it and has never looked back. Always takes his meds. It's made all the difference in the world to our relationship. More than once, he's said he wished he'd found out 40 years earlier!

We made it through that, and we'll make it through this. He once asked me "why did you stay?". My answer was straight out of the book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" (which I think is a book about bipolars, BTW)...the answer: Because when he was good he was soooooo good.

But those early years toughened me up. I had to for survival. I'll get through this too. I don't think ours is a love story like yours. Mine is a different kind of love story. There are no stars in my eyes anymore. Everybody has a story. This is my reality now.

He's still tall and handsome, if gray now, and as bipolars often are, he is still charming. He was the best looking guy at my 50th class reunion last year. la di dah cheerleaders, how do you like that! Smiler

They'll love him at the nursing home, should it get to that, and as long as he can put the words together they'll say to me "but he's always so nice to Meee". Until the end, there will always be those who can't believe it and think I'm making it up....I can always say "that DEPENDS". Smiler
Anonymous
Posted: Saturday, January 7, 2012 10:09 AM
Originally posted by: Jim Broede

You know how to roll with the punches, Sheryl. You'll get through life and care-giving just fine. --Jim
Anonymous
Posted: Saturday, January 7, 2012 10:09 AM
Originally posted by: SherylS

We've been at a killer estate sale for about 3 hrs.
Stopped at neighborhood bistro for hot au jus sandwich...yummy. He chatted everybody up!

Left and got in the car to drive 1 mi home. THEN he says "I've got to Pee"

Well can you wait until we get home.....(why didn't he go there?)

Nope, didn't work!

At least I was able to take an old tee shirt and soak up the front seat before it infiltrated the foam rubber!

Another first on the Alz highway.