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Sad to see my dad this way
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: Abraham05

I am currently living with my 78 year old widowed mother. I am looking at all resources to help keep her out of a home. Does your dad qualified for medicare? Even if not, there is a program thru Department of Health and Human Services in your state that may help.
The program is called 'Independentchoices'. It provides monies which can be paid to anyone your dad or his representative directs. Check it out. Best Wishes.
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: Katerin

Greeneyes,
I'm sorry about your dad.My father was a WW II veteran too. God bless them all. Do you have a Veteran's Hospital near you and has he applied for any benefits? There may be at least some assistance in your area. Do you have someone working with your family?
I'm sorry you haven't had any responses here but you may want to repost your message in the caregiver's section. You will get many responses and more help there. Good luck. K
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: Malinda

I also signed my Dad up for these benefits. I went to our local VA office and they helped me with everything. It took a while though. Because of the diagnosis of Alzheimers the VA required he have a fudiciary (someone to oversee his money) They did a background and credit check on me, don't worry my credit wasn't perfect. I had to be interviewed as well. But even though it took 6 months Dad got back pay of over $14,000.00. It has been a huge blessing. We were able to set aside some money for burial which was a concern for him early on. I have learned to find joy in everyday conversations with Dad. Focus on what you have right now. Not was or will be. You will find a friend in your father you never knew. If I can help feel free to email with questions mandmriley@cox.net

http://alzheimersstory.blogspot.com/2008/08/life-with-alzheimers-patient.html
Internal Administrator
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Joined: 1/14/2015
Posts: 40463


Originally posted by: greeneyes

My father has alzheimers. I think he is in his middle stage of the disease. My brother stays with him. He says he talks to himself, sleeps a lot, doesn't take his medication, doesn't eat. I know its very frustrating for him. there are 10 kids in our family and we take turns keeping him company 7 days a week in the evening. But he is home by himself during the day. I don't think this is a good thing. We have resarched home care services, but I think its all about the money. My brothers and sisters together can't really afford home care financially,on a long term basis. He is a WWII veteran, and you would think he would be eligible for something. I don't agree that he should be put in a home, because that would literally kill him. I love my dad and have always been close to him. Is there some resources that anyone has as how to keep him at home and be able to pay for it. Please let me know.
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: Katerin

No, he shouldn't be by himself and it sounds like your brother needs help getting your dad to take his medicine too.
Things can be improved for him, I believe. It does sound as though you have some work to do in order for things to get better. I guess I would start with the family doctor and then your local Alzheimers Association.
If you want to tell us what state you are in , then I am sure many others can give you more specific information too.
Again good luck.
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: gingerlew

I feel sad as well. My paternal grandmother was diagnosed when she was 81. SHe passed when she was 85 (unrelated). My maternal grandmother is now 70 and was diagnosed at 66. It has been difficult to deal with for our family, mainly because she is so young. She doesn't understand what she is going through... Out family has been treating the disease as if it were something to hide and be ashamed of... I am quite frankly TIRED of pretending that all is well. It is not well and we are helping no one by living in DENIAL!!! Sorry for my rant... I need to be able to explain why my grandmother is no longer the same woman that she once was... I love her so much and need to do that for her own dignity and self worth. This disease really hurts. I hate it and want to find a cure... thanks for letting me share.
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: KS

My Dad is 77 and we put into full Alheimers care in March of this year. My mom passed away 2 years ago and that's when we found out he was in the early stages of Alzheimers, she was hiding it from my 2 sisters and I. (we all live away) In 2 short years my Dad has went from randomly forgetting somethings, to not knowing who I was when I went home to visit him in April of this year! Now he sleeps most of the time, has to be fed, and is starting to be somewhat abusive to the staff.
When I look into his eyes, I can clearly see that he is no longer in there, I miss him!
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: Fragrance

my mum looks after my grandmother who is an alzeimers patient. She lost her job and since then she decided not to go to work and stay with my grandmother since the latter lives alone in her house. The problem with my grandmother is that she doesn't eat and doesn't like taking her medicines. If forced then she vomits...
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: Pat Schaffner

my dad was just diagnosed 6/26/07. he is in the mild stage right now but he is 81. he hates it so bad. he can't drive anymore and he has a hard time following along with conversations and remembering names. i am the oldes of 8 kids - my mom is still alive too, and also takes care of my handicapped sister who is 48. so we are beginning to really have our hands full. if your dad is a vet check out the veterans hospital in your area - i am sure he is entiteled to benefits there. it really is not a good idea to leave him alone at all. my dad gets nervous if left alone - doesn't want to answer the phone either. hang in there and good luck - may God bless you and your family.
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: karenlynn

We are dealing with what comes next for my stepdad also. He really needs to have someone at home with him during the day (my Mom works about 3 hours a day locally).
I hope you are able to make the right decision for your family. It's tough, I know.
Anonymous
Posted: Friday, January 6, 2012 11:28 AM
Originally posted by: Nauri

There is a program available through the VA for veterans called a "Non-service related disability pension." This is available to our veterans simply by applying. You'll need some documentation, but they can tell you what all you need. This is separate from the disability pension available for service related disabilities such as hearing loss - worth around $250.00 per month and includes hearing aids and batteries.
This NSR pension can be around $1,800.00 per month. Certainly not enough to cover full time care, but it can help cover many of the medical expenses - including home care. Home care does include care by family members and can be paid to the family member(s) as a salary, once all other medical expenses are taken care of (insurance, Rx, OTC drugs/supplies, etc.

If you have done a good job keeping track of receipts and expenses, this pension can also be retro-active. Dad's first check was for around $7,000.00. Should he precede Mom in death, she will continue to receive just under half of the NSR penison.

This isn't something the VA advertises, so you do have to go in and ask for it specifically!