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I cried last night so hard
Lesley Jean
Posted: Saturday, November 14, 2015 11:56 AM
Joined: 2/13/2013
Posts: 2965


I got a call earlier this week that someone complained about my yard. I have plants that have not been planted and are in the corner of the back yard. (I would like to know how they knew as you can't see them from the street). I  was so upset that who ever called the home owner's association didn't have compassion and the Home Owner Assoc guy, did not have the compassion to tell them what I am going through. I doesn't even look bad or messy, just a complainer. 

Then last night, while I was watching the terrifying news about the attacks in Paris, I got a call. The Home Owner Assoc guy called. He said "you have Christmas lights on, on your house." I guess I didn't hear him say the two on/s.  I said that I knew and it was the only time that the company could put them up before charging more. He interrupted me and in a not so nice tone of voice stated that the lights were on. Dumbfounded, I asked him "What?" "I am getting complaints that your Christmas lights are on!" I replied, "No, they aren't." He yelled, "They are on now and were on last night! It is against the Association rules to have them on before Thanksgiving." I yelled back, "If they are on, I didn't know it. If someone has a complaint they can come to me. If they want something done they can be neighborly and help me. You can tell them I said this and if they don't like it, they can kiss my a-- and go to H---!" I then slammed the phone down.

I very seldom use language like that. I very seldom loose it. Last night, I couldn't take it. I was so upset about France, feeling lonely, missing Jerry and then this call, I cried  till 1:00 in the morning. I finally feel asleep. I woke up at 11 am, feeling like I didn't sleep at all. 

I can't believe how mean some people are. My yard is cut, trimmed and neat. I have planted some beautiful plants and everyone says it looks so nice. Yes, I haven't had the time to plant, but so what! I had no idea the people who installed the lights had them plugged in and on a timer. If someone would have said, "Do you know your Christmas lights are on?" I would have thanked them and unplugged them.  This is not what I need right now. Not even 3 weeks has passed since Jerry passed away. I guess some people are just plain ugly. 

I guess I better get my butt out and do some yard work or else I will get more complaints. UGH!!

Thanks for letting me vent.

LJ


jfkoc
Posted: Saturday, November 14, 2015 1:07 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 20034


I am with you if you want to "T.P." the complainer's house!
Lesley Jean
Posted: Saturday, November 14, 2015 3:30 PM
Joined: 2/13/2013
Posts: 2965


Let's go! I'll the the tp and lots of it!

 


300sun
Posted: Saturday, November 14, 2015 5:40 PM
Joined: 2/20/2014
Posts: 294


So insensitive of these people and HOA. I cannot fathom talking to a recently widowed person that way. 

I love what you told the HOA guy!


surfergirl
Posted: Saturday, November 14, 2015 6:49 PM
Joined: 1/23/2012
Posts: 781


Hi, Leslie Jean,

Was not going to post anything to night, couple of glasses of wine ! I really do feel for you, most home owner assn. are nothing but a small diktatership , comprised of otherwise impotent people, that have not enough worries of their own, or enough to do. Messing with a grieving Human is unforgivable. You tell them to friekin'g F--- of.

Much  hugs to you stay strong

love Surfergirl


jfkoc
Posted: Sunday, November 15, 2015 12:03 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 20034


Yeah, like the Historic board in Santa Fe. They want to tell you what kind of toilet paper you can buy.
socwkr
Posted: Sunday, November 15, 2015 2:51 PM
Joined: 10/6/2012
Posts: 924


Hey, Leslie Jean.  There was an article in the newspaper the other day about people who are "micro-complainers".  I attached the link below for you.  These are people where there is no "small thing".  Everything is critical to them and they need to complain about it.  So, you have neighbors where nothing is too small, even Christmas lights, to complain about.  

I live in a small town, and our rule is the following: if you see something that you don't like, such as a neighbor who hasn't been able to mow their lawn or rake their leaves, then instead of complaining, get off your a@# and do it for them.  I learned that everyone is going through some challenge in their life and our job is to be kind to them.  

I guess for your neighbor it's nice to have nothing to do all day long, so you look out your window and find fault with other people.  You'd think that your neighbor would have knocked on your door, and said "Can I help with some of your chores?".  

Hugs, Debra.

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/11/15/fashion/the-microcomplaint-nothing-too-small-to-whine-about.html



Lesley Jean
Posted: Sunday, November 15, 2015 10:00 PM
Joined: 2/13/2013
Posts: 2965


thanks to everyone for your support and Debra, great article.

I expect a nasty letter from the association in the next few days.

LJ


KML
Posted: Monday, November 16, 2015 11:38 AM
Joined: 11/30/2011
Posts: 2105


Lesley Jean:

I think you should write your own letter first to the HOA.  The best way to get to these people is to be calmly persistent in your approach, that throws them off.  Do the opposite of them, that really throws them off.

Explain the tone of the phone call from this HOA person to you.  How unprofessional it was.  Tell them how upsetting it was to receive such a harsh and rude call. Tell them that you have had a very recent and significant loss in your life and to receive such terrible treatment through an HOA who you pay your dues to is very unacceptable and unwarranted.  I would complain to the officers of the HOA and document this.

Doing this will make you feel better, it will be documented and everyone on the HOA board will know what an a** this person was and hopefully that person will be reprimanded.  You don't have to take that baloney from anyone!

 


Mrs. Braxton
Posted: Tuesday, November 17, 2015 11:13 PM
Joined: 9/12/2012
Posts: 929


Lesley

I am sorry you have had this experience.   I agree that a letter would be appropriate to the HOA.  Life is too short to worry about such things.  or at least handle them with calmness.   I for one do not like HOA's in general.

I am thinking of you often and know how it is each day.  pretty much blah . Even though we have great Faith and know where our DH's are, we miss them so much.

Sending you hugs,

Angela   


Lesley Jean
Posted: Tuesday, November 17, 2015 11:20 PM
Joined: 2/13/2013
Posts: 2965


a letter is a great idea. I will write it and copy it so you all can read it. 

 


KML
Posted: Wednesday, November 18, 2015 11:32 AM
Joined: 11/30/2011
Posts: 2105


Good for you, Lesley Jean.  I would love for you to share that letter with us.  I was brought up to be quiet and take whatever anyone threw at me.  That did not serve me well in life.

I personally am sick and tired of doing that.  I have learned to stand up for myself.  I've learned to be persistent and calm to begin with, then kick things up a notch as needed, but always to get the point across.  This puts you in control of the situation and not them.  I've learned you don't have to shout to be heard, but be steely persistent and state what you want or do not want. 

It is your right to be treated well and with respect.