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Anyone Feeling Their LO Hanging Around Often?
Rockym
Posted: Wednesday, August 8, 2018 6:11 PM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


Okay, so I will start this with the fact that I am not religious, but I feel I am spiritual.  I think we had this discussion somewhere else, but I won't go there right now ;--).  Anyway, for the past few months since mom passed, I have been feeling her hanging around a lot.  I am not talking about a quick chill or brief experience, but more then that.

So many things remind me of her and so many sayings that she had, etc.  Well stuff just keeps popping up constantly.  Sometimes it's comforting and other times it is a bit creepy.  For example, just today I bought some candy and decided I would buy 2 pieces of a candy she loved.  I'm not real into that candy, but added it to my bag.  When I sat down to eat my candy, one of the songs I played at her funeral was being piped though the speakers and then I realized I was sitting in a chair, at a table where her and I ate some months before.

I don't know if our brains are primed for these experiences, but often it really does feel like she's around.  Anyway, this was just one example, but I was wondering if anyone else has this happening and if you do, what is it?  Perhaps I will post some more examples as they occur.  I miss my mom.


ladyzetta
Posted: Wednesday, August 8, 2018 8:53 PM
Joined: 2/16/2017
Posts: 1505


Dear Rockym,

I do believe in spirits and yes they do hang around and I feel they will as long as you want them too, My DH passed away 4 months ago and I feel his spirit a lot and I even talk to him.

A few days ago I was driving down a back road in our small town and I heard him tell me to (slow down there was a curve coming up.)   So I did and there was a curve. I told my daughter about this and she told me that was one of her Dads favorite roads he took to go to the shooting range. That was a bit scary. My DS passed away 4 years ago her spirit talked to me a lot but not so much anymore. I think they are there when you need them. Your Mom will never leave you. Hugs Zetta  


Tink4495
Posted: Wednesday, August 8, 2018 11:49 PM
Joined: 5/2/2014
Posts: 761


Hi Rockym,

I too believe in spirits and this belief runs strong in my family. I feel my mom is still around in many ways. I set my coffee pot to brew right before I wake up in the morning, many times, my pot has been turned off and the coffee not brewed, sometimes it has been turned off half way through brewing etc. Coffee was my moms drink of choice all day long. I feel she is doing this to let me know she is here. I also found many small beads in my house on the floor, on the garage floor and on the passenger side floor of my car. I had never seen these beads before and have no idea to this day where they came from. A few times when mom was heavy on my mind, I would get in my car and a song that always reminded me of her would be the 1st song that came on. I rarely see dragonflies but one day no too long ago, I planting flowers and one showed up and landed on the fence next to my garden and just stared at me, something I could see mom doing to let me know she approved as she loved her flower beds. Mom loved Christmas and I have he original Elf on a shelf that is 50+ years old. I set it on the entertainment center in a certain position as he sometimes falls over and one day I come home and he is moved and in a different position and neither my son or boyfriend say they moved it. Have ladybugs land on me when I am outside and thinking about her. I have never experienced hearing her voice or seeing her but I do feel she is around. Many other little things have happened since she passed and my son or boyfriend laugh and say, is that you Shirley or Nanny? I have a few times heard noises in the house that have woken me up from sleep and then not be able to figure out what or where the noise came from, mom was always rummaging through things.

Not too long after my husband passed, I came home and my Coca-Cola radio/light that sits on the top of my refrigerator was turned on. Had not turned it on in years, so have to assume he was saying hi. I heard a song not too long ago while working in the yard that was from the early 90's that he had bought me the cd single of, had not heard that song in years but again, think it was him saying hi.

A few months after my father passed, I had a very vivid and real dream of him standing at the foot of my bed. Normally i don't remember my dreams but it was so real, it woke me up. My stepmom says she still has visits from my dad.

I truly believe they are always with us, I miss them all. Hugs


Skittles412
Posted: Friday, August 10, 2018 6:40 AM
Joined: 5/14/2018
Posts: 259


My mom has been gone for two months now and I have yet to receive a sign or have a dream about her.  I am desperately waiting for some kind of sign from her. 
Rockym
Posted: Friday, August 10, 2018 11:28 AM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


Wow, I love these stories.  Tink, I got chills reading about your family.  I also don't have dreams, or least recall them much, and just two days ago in my dream I was sitting in a theater (mom loved the theater for movies, musicals, etc.) and my mom was sitting on a chair in the front facing the audience,  No one was in the theater yet, but me and mom and it appeared she was some type of docent.  She had no wheelchair as she had in the past 2 years, but was sitting on a chair that was sort of like a bar stool.

Anyway, she was also wearing the grey hippy sweater I bought for her when she moved to my state back in 2015.  I walked up to her in my dream and asked her what the heck was she doing here.  I was sort of taken aback and didn't understand how she could be there.  I gave her a hug and then asked her if she was eating well.  She said she was fine and then the scene sort of changed and I was a tad freaked out and woke up.  I recall wondering in the dream why she wasn't at the cemetery and if there had been some mix up.  I think I even looked at a pic I had of her in her casket (she looked so beautiful) to remind myself that we really had a funeral and she really was gone.

Either way, I think she was somehow telling me that she was fine and that perhaps she was happy as I had just been to the theater with my daughter a few days prior.  I take my son and daughter to plays often.  It is the one thing I splurge on without a thought.  Anyway, there is my mom's hello for the day.  Still happening.


Rockym
Posted: Saturday, August 11, 2018 6:33 PM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


I totally feel like birds are very symbolic.  The day before my mom passed, there was a beautiful yellow song bird that must have flew into the back window of my house.  We don't usually see this type of bird.  Mostly pigeons will do that so it was unique.  After that, there were many bird situations.  They were either flying in front of me or there were hummingbirds sitting on a bush near me and just hanging out.  I am always open to bird signs.

So here is another thing that happened just yesterday.  I went to Lowe's to return something and decided to roam.  When I was there, I saw a Gardenia patio plant on sale for 50% off.  The week after my mom passed, I planted 3 of these bushes to honor her as it was her favorite flower.  Well all three bushes died so I replaced them with a more hardy plant with a white flower.  Anyway, I bought the patio plant and when I got in the car and turned on the radio "Always look on the bright side of life" was playing.  This was one of three songs I played at her funeral.  She loved Broadway music and she had a wicked sense of humor so it seemed fitting.  Anyway, the song was playing and the line went:

For life is quite absurd, And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow
Excuse me - is that a shrubbery?

Oh, yes, I'm throwing it out. The cat won't leave it alone
What a stroke of luck! I'll take it off your hands. Pay the lady, Patsy!

Always look on the bright side of life!
Always look on the bright side of life!
Side of life!  Side of life!

 And that is my newest mom experience with the shrub :--)


Tink4495
Posted: Sunday, August 12, 2018 1:10 AM
Joined: 5/2/2014
Posts: 761


Rockym, that's great. I love your story about the gardenia's as well. They were one of mom's favorite flowers. We have several bushes growing up and mom always cut fresh blooms and floated them in a bowl of water. I bought a gardenia bush last year at Lowe's as well but it did not make it. Had a few blooms before it died.

We have 5 hummingbirds hanging around this year, normally we have 2. The other day as I was in my flower garden where the dragonfly paid me a visit, a hummingbird was hovering right next to my head. Freaked me out a little bit that it was so close to me but loved it all the same. 

The broom fell over in the pantry the other night while no one was in there and it is propped in a corner, not easy for it to just fall over. Mom was probably cleaning up the floor. LOL.

I love knowing she is still around me as I miss her so terribly much. But when these occurances happen, it makes me smile and triggers all the good memories.

Skittles, keep looking and listening, when you least expect it, she will leave you a sign.


George K
Posted: Sunday, August 12, 2018 4:50 AM
Joined: 12/16/2011
Posts: 2820


A few events that I noticed shortly after my wife died; I can visualize her smiling as:

A light bulb burned out.

The computer quit working.

The refrigerator quit working.

But the one that meant the most to me was the day after her memorial service.  A hawk  perched on a low branch of a tree right outside the kitchen window for the entire time it took me to wash dishes, at least ten minutes.  I never saw that happen before or since that moment.  I often see hawks in high branches of trees, but never so close to the ground for so long.  It's the sign I most treasure.


Skittles412
Posted: Monday, August 13, 2018 7:17 AM
Joined: 5/14/2018
Posts: 259


Thank you dolor and tink!  I will keep looking, I know she'll come to me eventually.  I'm so glad you all have had signs, it gives me hope.  I wish you all peace xoxoxo
Rockym
Posted: Monday, August 13, 2018 9:00 AM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


George, I looked up hawk and saw:

When you have a hawk sighting, it’s a sign from the spirit realm that you are ready to take on a larger, more powerful expansion and vision of your world. The hawk symbolizes a need to start looking forward, envisioning your path ahead, and perhaps even preparing for a greater role in life. You could end up leading a group or church, becoming a parent or just finding a wider audience for your talents, gifts, and ideas. A hawk sighting is a direct message from the angels and the Great Spirit that the time has come to spread your wings, to fly higher, and to expand your vision.

It's sort of strange to me that I never liked birds when I was younger, but when I was older, I started to see the meaning in their presence.  I now have many bird symbols around my house and it's a reminder of those from the past and they are pleasing to me know.

Kat, If you are open to the signs, they will most likely come.  The one thing I can say is that sort of like a relationship... you can't look for it, it just happens.  Perhaps you can encourage it by playing music that your mother loved, watch or read something that was special to her, etc.  I still have three bags of clothes that I have not passed on to charity.  I was planning on it until I realized the clothes still had my mom's smell on them.  So, for now I can take a shirt out and there she is.  I don't know if I am bringing her around this way, but my guess is yes.


Skittles412
Posted: Monday, August 13, 2018 10:34 AM
Joined: 5/14/2018
Posts: 259


Thanks Rocky; I'll take your suggestions. 
George K
Posted: Tuesday, August 14, 2018 6:02 AM
Joined: 12/16/2011
Posts: 2820


Rocky, thank you for that insight.  Actually, that is my big struggle: being ready to get on with my spiritual growth by seeing and sharing the bigger picture instead of focusing on my personal losses.  I think part of that is doing it on my own after so many years of partnering with my wife.  But I'm really not alone, am I?  That's what the hawk was trying to tell me.

I think many, many ages ago, before there was the written word, cave men and cave women's only connection with God and the spiritual world was through dreams and nature.  Then along came the written word, and then books, and then people writing about who God is and how to live a spiritual life.  Alas, we believed what was written and that original connection with God, our innermost being, and nature was lost in the process.  I  think  most of my spiritual growth nowadays is unlearning all the crap I learned in life, as Simon and Garfunkle sing about.  


George K
Posted: Thursday, August 16, 2018 5:06 AM
Joined: 12/16/2011
Posts: 2820


My mom's favorite birds were cardinals.  The church where her funeral service was held has a huge cross directly outside a window.  During the 45 minute service, a cardinal perched on that cross the entire time and observed everything that went on.  I think of that as God sending a message that my mom is at peace and in good hands.

One of my mom's favorite flowers was a viburnum, that typically blooms in May. I'm one of three brothers who lived nearby.  We all agreed that my mom would never be alone after she went into hospice care, so one of the three of us was always with her.  She died August 20th.  A few days after she died, three buds opened on a viburnum shrub I have in my back yard.  I think that was my mom thanking us for the loving care we provided her.

My oldest son died after more than ten years of living in physical pain.  After he died, I quit listening to the radio, watching TV or reading newspapers or books because they always seemed to be about death.  About a week after he died, I was driving on Interstate 95.  There were a lot of trucks with tires that were making a lot of noise.  I turned on the radio, and a song by The Who was playing.  The exact words I they were singing were" "I'm free!"  I think of that as a message from my son letting me know he is pain-free.

When my wife died, I spent most of the day with our grandchildren.  When I finally got home that afternoon and turned on the radio, a song by Bob Dylan was playing.  Part of the lyrics to the song I heard are:

  
"And is our purpose not the same on this earth
To love and follow his direction?"
 
That's the path we tried to follow as a couple;  I believe that song was a message from my wife telling me to keep on truckin': when I try to love everyone unconditionally, exactly as they are, I believe that's the path God wants me to walk and my wife confirmed it.
 

 

  

  


Rockym
Posted: Thursday, August 16, 2018 8:38 AM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


dolor, I too had flickering lights in my basement TV room the other night.  When it was happening, I just thought it was odd and then I read your post.  Perhaps it was a hello... not too sure.  ;--)

George, your story once again gives me chills.  My mom loved gardenias and roses.  She had both in her backyard.  The morning of the funeral, there were some rose bushes in the backyard and there were only three flowers that had blossomed.  These with three beautiful perfect buds.  Two were red and one was white.  I cut them and put them in a vase.  I took that as a sign that mom and dad were now together and my brother who passed 30 years ago (the white rose) was too.  It seemed so symbolic and moving that morning.  We stayed in town a couple more days and before we left the roses had opened and the peddles had dropped.

Lastly (but probably not) I was at the mall a couple of days ago and I have started buying 2 nonpareils candy when I buy my jellybeans at the candy store.  Mom loved dark chocolates and these were one of her favorites.  I buy 2 pieces and eat one for her and one for me.  They aren't my favorites, but I do this in her memory.  After I walked out of the store, the mall was playing the 2nd song that I played at her funeral.

I was taken back because for her services I read a eulogy and then played 3 songs.  The first was the song she had passed away to.  She was holding my hand and I was crying while Barbara Streisand was playing a somewhat religious song.  The 2nd was a more popular song my mom liked about a New York girl and the 3rd was the Monty Python song.  What are the odds that out of the 3 songs one would be playing right after buying her candies?

Again, I am not religious, but I am spiritual.  I have a combination of how I was brought up and the things I believe all mixed together.  Either way, mom is so hanging around.  I just wish she could get the moving truck to pack up some things from her home and get them to mine.  I'm a tad frozen in this next endeavor. :--)


Skittles412
Posted: Thursday, August 16, 2018 12:21 PM
Joined: 5/14/2018
Posts: 259


Rocky that is really uplifting to me.  All these signs you're getting must bring you some sort of peace. It gives me hope that my mom will come to me as well. I hope you keep seeing signs and continue sharing them with us.  

Hugs

-Kat


His Daughter
Posted: Sunday, August 19, 2018 9:31 AM
Joined: 6/25/2014
Posts: 2270


Hi Rockym, I'm taking the lazy way out, and am going to copy and paste something from the final chapter of my book.  I wasn't, and still haven't, gotten any specific signs from my dad, but others around me sure did.  

 

I was told by many friends, that I should watch for a sign my Dad might send me.   But apparently, if it were possible, my Dad chose some others to have fun with.  Several of the Entertainment Committee members had several experiences getting very strong smells of Dad’s cologne out of nowhere.   Once, this happened as a group standing in Dad’s kitchen.  Each person didn’t want to say anything, because they thought the others would think they were crazy.  And for Tracie, it even happened in her own kitchen while she was making my mom’s meatloaf recipe.    

 

But Mark seemed to be the clear winner of Dad’s antics.  One day when he was at the end of shoveling Dad’s driveway, he stopped and looked up and down the street, “Duane, I swear you still have he best kept home in the neighborhood.”  he said, as he looked at all the snow packed drives.  And with that, even outside in the crisp air, Mark’s nose was filled with the strong smell of Dad’s cologne. 

 

Another day, there was a tap, tap, tap on his leg as he drove home from work. It was very firm and distinct.   Mark assumed it was the keys hanging from the ignition.  But when he went to adjust things, of course, there was nothing even close to his leg.  It was the same tap game Dad played with me in the airplane on our first trip to Vegas, and with all the little kids.   

 

But the best sign came one day at the car wash.  Mark had just been to Dad’s after work to check on the house. As he pulled out of he drive, he thought he might drop by the car wash if it wasn’t too busy.  He pulled up to the machine that takes payment, and the speaker  said, “Hello.  Please pull forward when the stall is empty.”  Mark tried several times to slide his card for payment. But the machine simply wouldn’t accept it.  When the car already in the stall had finished it’s wash, the doors opened and the machine said, “Thank you.  Please pull forward.”   Mark pulled in the stall, the doors closed and the water started rushing.  When he got home he was laughing, “Gail, in all my life and all the car washes I have done, I have never been given a free wash.  I swear it was your Dad.”   And oddly, that wouldn’t surprise me.  “Mark, Dad’s just paying you back for taking his car to that car wash on his birthday.”  I offered.   

“But why me, Gail?  Why isn’t he doing this stuff to you?” Mark asked. 

“Because Dad knows you’re going to tell me.  Next time, just ask him if he’s alright.  Tell him that Gail just needs to know he’s ok.”  I requested.   

Honestly, I wish Dad would come to me.  I wish I could experience some personal sign that tells me he is doing ok.  Who knows, maybe that will happen someday when the time is right.  But for now, I was grateful that Dad was still creating smiles and chuckles.  He certainly always loved to pull his pranks.     

         

 


abc123
Posted: Sunday, August 19, 2018 3:41 PM
Joined: 6/12/2016
Posts: 1844


Sometimes when I’m alone and the house is quiet and still, I hear my husband call out my name . It’s always clear as a bell and it’s his voice. It’s very comforting.

He’s been gone 5 years and 4 months now. The morning he died there were three pair of cardinals in the river birch tree in our front yard. He and I enjoyed bird watching together and we had also raised love birds. I still enjoy the birds in our yard but they have a special meaning to me now.

Other things happen in the house. Lights being turned on or off. The coffee pot being turned on or off. My husband drank coffee everyday. The shower door being closed or opened. My favorite thing is when I can smell the aroma of coffee in the house and I haven’t made any coffee for days. And sometimes there is this wonderful feeling of love and peace in the house. It’s hard to explain but I feel very safe and content. The entire house feels safe like it’s covered by a blanket of protection. Sometimes I’m aware of it during the day and sometimes I’m aware of it at night and I’ll go outside and the feeling is outside too. And I sit outside in the dark and it’s peaceful. Sometimes I talk to God, sometimes i’ll Talk to my husband. The way it feels is wonderful. It’s all good things at the same time and I feel it physically and emotionally and my spirit is full and there’s so much peace. Just sitting there in the dark being still and soundless. It’s as if the darkness is the blanket that covers me with everything that I need. And I’m so gratful to be aware of this. These are new blessings to me. When my husband first died, I was scared of the dark. I was scared to be alone. I was even scared to go outside in my own yard during the day. I can remember being so frieghtened to take the dogs out, I carried my pistol in the yard at night. I knew at the time that God was with me but I just couldn’t let go of my fear. I would only leave the house when it was absolutely necessary because it felt like John was still home and he needed me. What if he needed me and I wasn’t there. I knew he was going to die soon, that it would be any day any moment. The doctors had told me and the hospice director told me. And in my infinite ignorance I thought I was prepared for his death. I was so stupid. My precious husband died on his own terms, his own way, the way he did everything else. And it shocked me to my core. His death kicked me in my stomach hard, kicked me so hard I couldn’t breathe. The moment I walked out of our bedroom, the exact moment I left the room my precious husband left this life. In one flash of a whisper he was gone. My best friend, my lover, my partner, the person who made me happy and sad and furious, the person who knew me so well and so true was gone and it scared the hell out of me. I had all of these feelings that I did not anticipate because I knew he was terminal. I’ve got to be the stupidest woman on earth. The very dumbest. How could I have been such an a** to think that I could handle his death gracefully?  It’s been five years and four months since he died and I’m still learning and growing and missing him. I’m learning how to grieve for him and for us and for our marriage. I’ve come to realize that I could have never, ever been totally prepared for his death. I am learning to deal with guilt, both real and imagined guilt. I have come to value and appreciate the fact that I was blessed with being his caregiver. I value and adore every time that he turns on a light or turns off the coffee maker and calls my name. I am so blessed by my Heavenly Father. I look forward to sitting in the dark these days. And I sometimes wonder what else God has in store for me.


Rockym
Posted: Sunday, August 19, 2018 11:07 PM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


His Daughter, those are some great stories!  Did you write a book about your family and alz?  I love to write, but never could sit to put together my experiences.  I tend to learn about whatever I am dealing with and then share it verbally (or online) and then I move on.  I used to belong to an online cancer group and that was a place to learn and share.  I'm 7 years out now so I don't go back to that site too much anymore except to touch base with a friend or two.  Caregiving is still so fresh for me, so the topic sort of demands that I continue.

I haven't heard or seen anything from mom for a few days... maybe she is giving me a break.

abc, what a beautiful story.  The number 3 comes up often doesn't it?  My favorite number is 333 and multiples such as 6's and 9's.  Also, the birds seem to have a spiritual meaning for so many of us.  I never liked birds when I was young.  They scared me, they were loud and there were other things too.  Now I regularly buy seed and have a feeder in my backyard.  I almost feel like I owe these birds for whatever I thought all those years :--).

I'm glad you have peace now and that after many years you can still have messages from your husband.  When you say "And I’m so grateful to be aware of this," I know what you mean.  When I was younger these incidences scared me too.  As I got older I began to realize that there was nothing to be scared of and that it was a gift.  I raised my kids to see the beauty in these coincidences and to not let it freak them out.  They are both very sensitive and also see and hear things, but they aren't scared.  Teaching them to enjoy the experience when it occurs was important to me.


His Daughter
Posted: Monday, August 20, 2018 11:09 AM
Joined: 6/25/2014
Posts: 2270


Rockym,  yes I wrote the entire time my dad was sick.  It was the best thing I ever did.  It's brutally honest about every aspect of dealing with this disease as I was writing for ME, so I didn't hide anything.  Honestly, writing kept me sane!  It was a fabulous outlet for everything Dad and I went through.  And yes, it certainly includes my experience with my MIA siblings & dad's girlfriend who was hosing him for money.  It's not pretty, but it's honest.  It often reads like a soap opera. LOL  He died in Dec 2015, and I finished the final chapter at the end of January 2016.   

Enjoy your mom visits!  I still haven't personally had any visits from my Dad.  In some ways I wish I would.  I still miss him.  But I'm certainly glad that struggle is over for him.  


BethL
Posted: Friday, August 31, 2018 8:44 AM
Joined: 3/25/2015
Posts: 884


I received a phone call that my mom had passed away around 5:00 a.m. on a Sunday morning last November. My husband and I were at the nursing home by 8:30 a.m. to clean out her room. The body had already been removed. All was quiet, until, suddenly, a radio in her room started blaring loud traditional church music. I said, "Hi Mom."
Wgonzo
Posted: Friday, August 31, 2018 9:58 AM
Joined: 1/8/2016
Posts: 365


I believe our loved ones are always in the know of what's going on with us. When my dad passed in 2010 we were taken off guard. And, we all had visits from him in one way or another. He always came to me in my dreams.

When my mom started to go down this AD road I didn't dream with him the whole time. My feeling was he was watching over her. Last year when I had to put hospice in place and the months were passing I had a brief dream with my dad. I just asked him "how much longer will she go on & when will she pass" His answer was "when she's ready." That was it.

Since mom has passed I have felt a sense of peace and calm. She was very ready. But, it didn't stop me from wanting to hear from her in some form. Days, weeks & months have passed and I haven't gotten that communication from her that I would with my dad. Then one day not too long ago I was sleeping and in a state of sleep I saw her sitting on my bed & she was telling me I had to get up. But, it was the way I saw her........watching over me. Personally I know they are there. I just wish I could have a conversation with her like before this disease took over........

 

 


Rockym
Posted: Sunday, September 2, 2018 9:18 AM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


Wow, so many good stories.  So here is another that happened last week.  I've been looking for my mother's identification card and then realized her old driver's license, passport and insurance card were also missing.  Because these documents are sort of specific, I knew they must all be together somewhere.  Each day I looked in files and various places.  My mom used to call it "the hunt."  Before her illness and moving near me, I would talk to her on the phone often.  She was always misplacing things and tell me she was "on the hunt."

When I couldn't find these things after about a week, I laughed and said something to myself about being on the hunt.  I sort of spoke to my mom and said that I really wanted to find the items and move on.  I swear, within a minute, I pulled out another file folder and there they all were.  My next words were thanks mom.

About an hour later I received the mail and there was some paperwork where I needed to call to square away a bill.  The first thing they asked me about was ALL the information that was on her insurance card.  It seems that mom decided it was important for me to have the information when I found it and not a week earlier.

I haven't had as many experiences as I did in the beginning.  I feel like I am starting to mourn a bit more now.  I have so many things to finish in regard to clearing out my childhood home and then selling it.  It's been a little over 3 months since her funeral and all the energy I had is slowing down.  Feeling sad this week,


Goodtogo
Posted: Tuesday, September 11, 2018 6:24 PM
Joined: 11/27/2017
Posts: 49


Rockym, thank you so much!  After reading your post I realized that somewhere along my journey I stopped smelling the flowers and looking beyond the obvious and started looking.

The morning after my mom passed, an injured deer was in my neighbors yard and I took a few photos thinking it was surreal.  

I realized over the last several weeks a white butterfly has been hanging around, again thought it was odd, but didn’t really give it much thought. Two weeks ago a blue and black butterfly was hanging around the sitting area for while and I decided to take a picture.  A week later another butterfly but orange was hanging around in addition to the white butterfly still appearing weekly.  I have never seen in all the years living here butterflies.

Between your u post and the ongoing appearance of butterflies I finally got the message.  Wow, thanks everyone 

 

 


anib
Posted: Monday, September 24, 2018 12:57 PM
Joined: 7/29/2014
Posts: 217


What a great post, and great stories. 

I had my own experiences with my Mom showing up, at my house.  I had told my sister about it and just got laughed at. (they thought I was going off the deep end)

My point being, I do believe in spirits, and a lot do not.  So its great to hear all the wonderful experiences that you all have shared.

In all we have been through it's a good thing to know we were not forgotten.

I think it is a privilege for the visits and I do believe they just want to show us that they are okay.

May we all keep having wonderful signs and sightings!

Thanks for putting a smile on my face today!


Rockym
Posted: Wednesday, September 26, 2018 6:20 PM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


I'm glad to hear so many others have had these experiences too.  I've sort of slowed down this last month as I think the change of mom being gone has started to sink in.  I also know I have a lot of things to do so I can move on, but I've had some intense episodes of anxiety that have kept me from even making a phone call at times.  I'm pushing though, but this is always rough when I go from massive muli-tasker to inching along.

As this month has passed, I haven't had as many instances of feeling mom around.  The one thing that has occurred with some frequency is that I kept having dragonflies hanging around.  When I was out at the pool, there were purple ones hovering near me and then as the weather changed, there have been orange ones.  I didn't think much about it, but the other day I opened my garage door and another orange dragonfly came in.  It buzzed to the left and then to the right and then took off out the door it came in.  So today I looked up dragonflies and death and here is what it said:

This aspect of its life symbolizes transformation and renewal, and is even associated with spiritual renewal and self realization. In Native American legends, the dragonfly is a symbol of resurrection, and renewal after hardship. The dragonfly is a carefree insect that symbolizes free spirit, swiftness, and activity.

In almost every part of the world, the Dragonfly symbolizes change, transformation, adaptability, and self-realization. The change that is often referred to has its source in mental and emotional maturity and understanding the deeper meaning of life.

So, wow... the words above sound like they are describing mom and me.  I miss her.

  


Skittles412
Posted: Tuesday, October 2, 2018 1:11 PM
Joined: 5/14/2018
Posts: 259


So I went out to dinner with my twin and my sister last night. We were sitting there and suddenly I get this waft of Shalamar (perfume) and it gets stronger and stronger. Neither of my siblings can smell it, just me.  The smell stayed with me for a half hour or so.  That was my mom's favorite perfume.  I feel so happy that she dropped by to let me know she is with me. It makes me feel good.

That is it.... thanks for listening

-Kat


jfkoc
Posted: Tuesday, October 2, 2018 3:00 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 20125


There is no mistaking Shalimar!
Rockym
Posted: Tuesday, October 2, 2018 9:32 PM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


Oh Kat, I am so happy she checked in.  When I read your post I started to tear up.

A couple of days ago I was driving and was feeling overwhelmed.  I asked my mom and dad to help me out and perhaps lighten this load for me.  I was talking out loud and it's a good thing we all have speaker phones, etc. because I would have looked completely batty if someone saw me.

Anyway, after I voiced my feelings I heard the radio playing Hotel California.  My parents bought their home in California in 1969 and I have to go back there next week.  Hearing this at that moment made me feel both good and a little uncomfortable at the same time.

So I called up the Captain
"Please bring me my wine."
He said, "We haven't had that spirit here since nineteen sixty nine."
And still those voices are calling from far away
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say

Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place (Such a lovely place)
Such a lovely face
They livin' it up at the Hotel California
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise)
Bring your alibis

Last thing I remember
I was running for the door
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before
"Relax," said the night man
"We are programmed to receive
You can check-out any time you like
But you can never leave!"


Skittles412
Posted: Wednesday, October 3, 2018 9:44 AM
Joined: 5/14/2018
Posts: 259


You're right jfkoc, Shalimar has a very distinct smell. Although I don't particularly care for the smell, in this moment I totally LOVED it!!   

Rocky I love that story.  I love reading about these signs.  It brings me peace. I'm so happy for you and me for getting our signs.  Here's to many, many more!!!

xoxoxoxox -Kat


MPSunshine
Posted: Thursday, October 4, 2018 5:13 AM
Joined: 5/21/2016
Posts: 2010


The yellow dress.

 

A couple of nights ago I had a dream, some might call it a “visitation” from my mom. The dream was caused, perhaps, like in Scrooge’s story, by “too much rich food,” since I had veered off my diet that night and engaged with tamales from my southwest past, beef tamales, topped with cheese. I also had a dose of melatonin, which has the remarkable side effect of sometimes stimulating “vivid dreams.” Whatever the cause, the dream I had was remarkably healing, and it was the sort of dream I wanted to hold onto, to the point I didn’t particularly want to arise that morning, so immersed was I with the particulars of the dream, the dream feeling, the nuances within the dream.

 

Without further ado, here is the dream!

 

My mom appeared in the old house, the one in which I grew up, the Cape Cod with the small rooms, where I had my own room but my brothers had to share and there was only one bathroom for the lot of us. Anyway, my mom was running upstairs, and that was the first disconnect because somehow it was me, the older me, who was telling her to be careful, and that I would be right there to help her up the stairs, but she was laughing and she was unaware of me, and she was beckoning me to follow her, but it was the younger me who was being beckoned and I was clearly a child, because when I followed on the steps I was clearly younger and smaller than her. And her hair was brown, short and softly curly as she used to wear it in those days, and she was wearing a pretty yellow dress. There was no sign of arthritis, a broken back, stroke or other of the ailments that would take her down the gravity gravelly path later.

 

Her and my dad’s room upstairs was the biggest room in the house and she put on music there, the light came in through the windows from three sides and there was a breeze bringing fresh air into the music-filled room as she got out scarves and said, “Let’s dance!” Somehow in the dream there was the presence of the others perhaps, but they didn’t figure prominently here. The quote from the dream was after for some reason I didn’t dance right away, or I was perplexed about something, or perhaps worried because how was it she was so young and so happy and hopefully she wouldn’t fall and something bad wouldn’t happen, and my mom said to me very strongly, the words that stayed with me, “You need to stop worrying! You worry too much!”

 

And that was the end of that dream, but surprisingly, I’ve been going back to it now for two days, and I keep recalling details, her youthful face, the freshness of the air, the laughter, the admonishment to lighten up. And even in the middle of a dull workday when perhaps I took something too seriously I could hear her voice in my mind telling me to stop worrying, and it was easier for me to return to a happy state or at least a neutral place where everything is all right and she is still here.


Skittles412
Posted: Thursday, October 4, 2018 9:49 AM
Joined: 5/14/2018
Posts: 259


That is beautiful MP. It seems your mom is trying to tell you that she is happy and healthy in her new home.  How relieving that must be for you. I'm so happy for you.

-Kat xoxoxo


Rockym
Posted: Friday, October 12, 2018 11:13 AM
Joined: 1/17/2016
Posts: 939


MP, that is a great dream.  It's amazing when we have such clear experiences in our dreams that we can feel them even after we wake up.

Kat, I'm glad you felt mom around.  I still have one bag of clothes left to give away, but until they no longer smell like my mom they will stay in the closet.

Also, I was trying to change something on my post from yesterday and thank goodness I cut and pasted it to a word doc.  While I was editing, it was deleted.  I will post it again since it was so meaningful to me.

 


KML
Posted: Tuesday, October 23, 2018 12:32 PM
Joined: 11/30/2011
Posts: 2105


I wish so much my parents would pay me a visit.  I have been asking them to, even if in just a dream.  Since their deaths, I've had a couple of dreams, but not happy ones. 

I'm feeling even more so their absences because the holiday season is coming and so much has been lost. I miss them so much and so many things left unsaid and one more hug would be wonderful.

 

 


KML
Posted: Tuesday, October 23, 2018 12:48 PM
Joined: 11/30/2011
Posts: 2105


I have read the posts about birds and thinking back to when my mother passed away, I do have a story about a hummingbird.  When my mom passed away, I would drive to the cemetery each day to check to see if her plaque was completed yet.  Each day it was a disappointment that it wasn't finished, her name was not etched in.  One day, I went and again I didn't see her name etched in yet, my head was bent down and I was crying, just missing her so much.  There was a buzzing above my head and I looked up and there was a hummingbird near me and when I lowered my eyes again, my mom's name was there on the plaque.  I guess I didn't see it right away, maybe because I was crying.  The hummingbird hovering over me drew my attention to my mom's name.  When I see a hummingbird now, I think of my mom.  White butterflies, too, she had a lot of those in her garden. 

So remembering these things does help keep her close to me, something I can see, something that brings me close to her.  Maybe this is by my mom's design.  I would like to think so.

When I ask my parents to come to me in a dream for a visit, I apologize to them for asking something of them, so maybe this is the best they can do for me, and it is something special, so I'll take it and appreciate it and learn from this lesson how precious relationships are and how everything is so temporary, at least physically.

 

 


ladyzetta
Posted: Tuesday, October 23, 2018 9:30 PM
Joined: 2/16/2017
Posts: 1505


Yes, The other day I was driving to town and my DH was in the car in the passenger seat. I always did the driving and he was always the passenger and he was there a few days ago. It felt so real.