For the years of caregiving, it's usually a very long stretch of time and we become immersed in it and it is intense and very often the caregiving does fill up our life. When it ends, we are at a loss of what to do now. We are used to a routine, we have a schedule that we follow in caring for our loved ones. When that is gone, it's natural to feel disoriented and a bit lost. This is a normal feeling.

I think bereavement services would be a very good thing. We have to talk to someone who will tell us, this is the process of grief, we might feel lost now, but in time, we'll be okay.

For a variety of reasons I felt lost after my parents passed away. When my mom passed, I didn't think I could stand that. I missed her so much and couldn't imagine a life without her. I still had my family, my husband, my daughter, my father, so all was not lost and I got used to it eventually. I still miss her, but for my mom, her passing was a blessing for her and now I just feel grateful I had the time with her that I did.

When my father passed away, I felt intense guilt of now having more time to myself. I felt guilty for the reason of having that extra time. I didn't know what to do with that extra time. I missed him, but I know now he had to go, he couldn't go on the way he was, his passing was a blessing for him, as well. This is all the effects of grief and loss. It will pass, it will soften and you will go on.

Getting help with this tough part is a good idea, just like in the process of taking care of a love one, we had to rely on others for certain things to help us, this too, we need a little helping hand with also

LLDaughter:

I'm very sorry for the passing of your mother.

After my dad passed away, I spent a lot of time with my daughter, she was diagnosed with cancer a week before my dad passed away. She's fine now. So for awhile, things were still pretty hectic and at the same time grieving for my dad, so I kind of was numb for quite a while.

My routine was very different, I still went to work full-time as I did before, but after work, I just went home instead of visiting my dad. Weekends, the same, my routine was different, I would always spend time with my dad on the weekends, and then that wasn't the routine anymore. It took a lot of time to adjust, and I know that many will say that it's great to have more time, but for us the more time is because we lost someone, so we go through those feelings, sometimes feeling guilty, sometimes feeling we don't know where to go, what to do. It's an adjustment. It took me a long time not to jump at the sound of the phone ringing at night. Every once in awhile even still, I still react to that though.

After awhile, I tried to catch up on things at home that I didn't have time to do, painting the inside, trying to clean up and organize. Still working on that. Then there was my parents' home to empty.

I started back in on doing a hobby that I enjoy. I read a lot, that helped to get lost in a good story and to not think about other things. I still had work to keep my busy.

I did struggle a lot with my father's passing and my daughter's situation and concentrating on that so soon after my dad passed. Kind of felt like hitting the ground running.

I did see a counselor after my father passed away and tried to work through that.