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How do you celebrate your Holidays?
bull dog
Posted: Friday, December 25, 2020 6:20 PM
Joined: 4/1/2018
Posts: 101


Because my husband has declined so much, I find it is best for me to not to even try to enjoy a Holiday. I  don't think that listening to Christmas music with random screaming in the back ground would set the Holiday mood. I just try to disconnect from the insanity and socialize on social media with family and friends. I do not tell my husband  when we are having a Holiday,or Birthday,or Anniversary because he is not able to remember it and his reaction to is just to disappointing for me. What ever works out the easiest that is what I do these days.
Pathfinder52
Posted: Friday, December 25, 2020 6:45 PM
Joined: 7/7/2013
Posts: 439


Holidays in our house, especially this year, are just like any other day of the year.

Today, and on Thanksgiving this year, I spent more on my choices for dinner and we ate our larger meal mid-day rather than in the evening (but that's also because of the NFL games on TV).  

Hubby eats what I put in front of him, watches the football game (his team lost today), and asks me from time to time whether we're going to see the kids.  I explain, we're not, largely because of COVID-19.  This explanation satisfies his curiosity.

Lately, he's been wanting me to remind him to call his mother for Christmas.  
I remind him that HE is 89 years old and casually ask, "How old would that make your mom?"

Fortunately, he can still do the math and he quickly realizes that no one in his family is still alive, and no one expects him to "phone home" this year.

It's mostly just another Friday in our house -- it is 14 degrees outside and we have no place we need to go (thank goodness!).

Have a splendid holiday, no matter how you spend it!

--p


bull dog
Posted: Friday, December 25, 2020 7:17 PM
Joined: 4/1/2018
Posts: 101


Yes Pathfinder, Everyday is treated  like another day for me also. We have a lot of routine to keep up. My husband also asks me about his mother sometimes and I do the same thing and remind him how old he is.It seems an easier way to say it.
Ed1937
Posted: Friday, December 25, 2020 7:19 PM
Joined: 4/2/2018
Posts: 3833


Thanksgiving and today were spent in our house with no guests. One of our daughters made a great meal for us, and delivered it to our door. Other than that, it was just like yesterday and any other day.
Rick4407
Posted: Friday, December 25, 2020 7:33 PM
Joined: 4/4/2018
Posts: 206


Hello Bull & Paula,  My day was as yours, just a normal Friday like every other one.  The only bright spot was we are also having terribly cold weather and my DW said "It was cold as flugens!". She repeated it on my request and I searched for what "flugens" was.  

Its an expression of "excessive" whatever.   She said her grandmother used to say it.  Adding their two ages together we're getting back well into the 1800's.  It was used a lot in the south.  Just a tidbit of knowledge from 100 + years ago in rural Mississippi.  One of several that have popped out in the last 2 years.   I've never lived in the south so I find these old regional expressions interesting.   The things that are being unlocked from her childhood are occasional bright spots.


David J
Posted: Saturday, December 26, 2020 11:27 AM
Joined: 2/15/2020
Posts: 209


I am still trying to make special days special for DW. After this holiday season, including a birthday and anniversary celebrations, I am giving up. To her, it’s all too confusing. She refused to open her presents, and when I opened them for her, there was no recognition that they were for her or who they were from. 

So holidays will become jus another day from now on 


Marie58
Posted: Saturday, December 26, 2020 12:07 PM
Joined: 12/31/2018
Posts: 481


In a word...crying. This has been the saddest holiday ever for me. DH hasn't recognized holidays, anniversaries, birthdays, etc for well over a year. He's been in MC for almost 4 months now. Our kids, grandkids and I were able to visit him and give him some gifts in person since we have all had, and recovered from, Covid. As expected, he didn't understand anything but sure did enjoy the cookies! 

On a brighter note, I have focused more on the real meaning of Christmas. Jesus is my Savior and He was born as a baby and died on the cross for anyone who believes. I take comfort knowing that DH is also a Christian and he and I will be together again in Heaven some day!

Blessings everyone!


bull dog
Posted: Saturday, December 26, 2020 3:13 PM
Joined: 4/1/2018
Posts: 101


I so much appreciate all of your responses. It is very helpful to know that others out there understand what it is like to have, what feels like a abnormal Holiday, Birthday, Anniversary, etc because of the condition that our loved ones are in. It can feel depressing, lonely, or just strange to go through a Holiday, Birthday, Anniversary, etc without the normal response and normal activities that we have had in the past with our loved ones. I remind myself that it is just the way it has to be at this time under these circumstances. These days I just celebrate what we are still able to do.