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New Placement
Posted: Friday, May 29, 2020 8:02 PM
Joined: 5/29/2020
Posts: 1

Last weekend, I placed my Mom in a home.  I have been a mess ever since.  She was only diagnosed with Stage 1 approximately three months ago.  Then she had issues with her diabetes and multiple falls at home resulting in a broken arm the last time, then placement in a rehab center.  Family was caring 4 her but she decided she could no longer do so.  The profession of all of these events is a part of my grief. I thought that I would have more time with my Mom and I can see this is not going 2 happen.  It is like a death almost. Although she has been placed in a good home, she is still living with strangers.  She states that she is not happy.  I could go on and on.  Bottom line is that I feel like I am sinking emotionally.
Posted: Saturday, May 30, 2020 12:38 AM
Joined: 2/6/2018
Posts: 287

That is quite a roller coaster of events and emotions in a short period. If there are restrictions on visiting your Mom in the new home, that makes it even worse. I think there's a good chance both of you will feel better with time. And you may not be totally losing your Mom as soon as you think. Think of this as temporary and convey the same to her. "There's a lot going on right now and it's important for you to be somewhere safe and cared for until you recover more and the world settles down." In time, you can visit her in the facility, maybe do activities together, and even adjust her living arrangements if needed. Take it a day at a time. Meanwhile, this is grief for you and a loss as you said. Be gentle with yourself right now. You're not alone in your feelings.