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I remember when
toni2
Posted: Thursday, August 5, 2021 12:03 AM
Joined: 10/19/2017
Posts: 350


I am having a hard time sleeping tonight. Next week it will be 2 years since I lost my love. I was thinking of him so I got out my phone and played our song. Unchained melody by the Righteous Brothers. As it played I remembered us dancing and him singing softly the words of the song. Somehow I felt closer to him.
ladyzetta
Posted: Thursday, August 5, 2021 1:49 PM
Joined: 2/16/2017
Posts: 1709


Dear Toni,

Those are sweet memories to have. My DH passed away 3 years ago and I still be as quite as I can when I get up to go to the bathroom at night. Trying not to wake him up. He is still with me and that I am thankful for. Your DH will always be with you. Maybe try sleeping with that song playing.  Take Care of Yourself,  Hugs to You, Zetta 


toni2
Posted: Thursday, August 5, 2021 4:19 PM
Joined: 10/19/2017
Posts: 350


Thank you for your kind words. I did get some sleep but not as much as usual. I wouldn't want my DH back where he is in pain and I know I will see him once again. 

This year has been very hard for me because my son had covid and was in the hospital 77 days on life support. He is home now but he has a long struggle to get back to normal. Thank God for a wonderful wife who takes great care of him.

Thanks for your hugs and I'm sending hugs right back to you.

Toni


manuzito
Posted: Saturday, August 7, 2021 8:43 PM
Joined: 7/8/2018
Posts: 39


Toni, sorry to hear about your son.  Good wishes for his continuous recovery.

On the 14th of this month will be 7 months since my DH left us.  We married on the 14th and he died on the 14th day.  We would’ve been celebrating our 52nd anniversary, instead I’ll be going to his grave to spend sometime with him.

I miss him terribly and I also think of him as if he hasn’t left.  He was legally blind and was fully dependent on my care.  

I bought him a talking watch and he accidentally set the alarm at 2:16 pm to ring everyday.  I still visualize him placing the watch close to his ear and smiling saying that the watch worked.  

I’ve placed the watch next to his portrait and when the alarm comes at 2:16 pm every afternoon I look at his portrait and have the feeling that he’s telling me that he’s around.   Sometimes I cry and sometimes I just talk to him.

I don’t know if I will ever be the same person when I’m living without my other half.  It hurts so much. 

Unchained Melody is one of my favorites song.

 


toni2
Posted: Sunday, August 8, 2021 6:15 AM
Joined: 10/19/2017
Posts: 350


I am so sorry for your loss. I now am getting wonderful memories of things we did together. Last night I had a dream about my DH and I taking our children on a walk over the fields again. That was our favorite thing to do after church on Sunday. We would pick berries and eat them until we couldn't eat any more. We would take the path down through the woods to town and then walk the road back up the hill to our home. It was about a 7 or 8 mile walk but it was so much more than that. Our children remember those days too.

We were married 63 years and all but three months would have been 64 years. 


ladyzetta
Posted: Sunday, August 8, 2021 3:55 PM
Joined: 2/16/2017
Posts: 1709


Toni,     Those are beautiful memories. Thank You for sharing. Hugs Zetta
toni2
Posted: Sunday, December 19, 2021 7:06 AM
Joined: 10/19/2017
Posts: 350


This will be the 3rd Christmas with my dear husband. I miss him still but I can still hear him cry out in pain because he had broken both of his legs and they never healed so I wouldn't want him back here again. 

So far over 12 members of my family have had covid and all survived but one. 

I remember when life was easier and I don't think we will ever have that again. I thank God every day for all He has done and what He will do. This year I will be moving out of my 4 bedroom home and moving in with my daughter in her home. That will be a big change for me but I will survive. 

Praise God!


toni2
Posted: Thursday, April 14, 2022 8:06 AM
Joined: 10/19/2017
Posts: 350


I remember when my husband and I built this house. We did it ourselves together. I learned more at that time about building then I thought I would ever know or be able to do. 

Now in 2 months I will leave this all behind and move to my daughter's home. I have another loss to go through but this time I look forward to the freedom of not having to take care of the house. I don't want to be a burden to anyone. When something needs fixed, I don't have to worry how I will pay for it. I will have my own section of the house so I can be alone or if I'm lonely I will be with them.

For all who have lost someone I pray you will have comfort and peace.

Toni


Jo C.
Posted: Thursday, April 14, 2022 4:16 PM
Joined: 12/9/2011
Posts: 13113


Dearest Toni, warmest of thoughts and warmest of best wishes are being sent your way along with a soft hug . . .

J.


toni2
Posted: Thursday, April 14, 2022 4:50 PM
Joined: 10/19/2017
Posts: 350


Thank you for your kindness.
TessC
Posted: Friday, April 22, 2022 3:02 PM
Joined: 4/1/2014
Posts: 5213


Good luck in your move Toni. I can see you making  good memories in your new home with your daughter and her family. The house you built with your dear husband will now be a home for another family to enjoy and make memories in. Life insists on moving forward and it's good that you are willing to move forward too. I wish you the very best!
SQBEAR50
Posted: Saturday, April 30, 2022 6:05 PM
Joined: 2/25/2017
Posts: 286


So excited for you as you start a new chapter in your life Toni. Living your life!

Nicole


Jo C.
Posted: Saturday, May 21, 2022 12:41 AM
Joined: 12/9/2011
Posts: 13113


Toni, I have been thinking of you and wondering how you are doing; if you read this and have time, it would be good to hear from you.

J.


toni2
Posted: Tuesday, July 5, 2022 2:27 PM
Joined: 10/19/2017
Posts: 350


Hi J

I am okay. They are moving me on Friday. I have everything packed and sitting around except what I need every day. I know it will be very different but at this point in my life the doctor doesn't want me to live alone. My heart is in the beginning stage of heart failure and my lung diffusion capacity is at 25 % of what it should be. I trust God is in control of my life and I don't worry. 

Please tell everyone I said hello. I miss being on here but it's too much for me right now.

Toni


Jo C.
Posted: Tuesday, July 5, 2022 9:27 PM
Joined: 12/9/2011
Posts: 13113


Dearest Toni, it is so good to hear from you.  I will hold you in my heart and prayer as you make your big move.    May it be a wonderful positive and bring new warmth into your days.  You are a lovely person, you deserve the very best.

I can understand how tired you are feeling.  In the future, when things settle down, it will be good to hear from you whenever you feel up to writing a bit.

J.

 


toni2
Posted: Wednesday, July 20, 2022 9:18 AM
Joined: 10/19/2017
Posts: 350


Well, the move went smooth. I am putting things where I need them, I'm sure things will be moved till I find the right place for everything. God is good! 

Toni


Joydean
Posted: Wednesday, July 20, 2022 9:57 PM
Joined: 10/10/2021
Posts: 778


Toni, so glad the move went well. It does seem to take time to find just the right home spot for things ( like treasures I call them). You are right,  God is so very good! Enjoy being with your daughter and family!

Your song, Unchained melody  has always been our favorite song. We still listen to it and occasionally I can get him to just stand up and I hold him, no dancing anymore. 


Jo C.
Posted: Thursday, July 21, 2022 6:33 AM
Joined: 12/9/2011
Posts: 13113


It is good news that the move went smoothly; I sure do understand your continuing to find the right places for everything.  I remember after moving doing just that, changing some things around from space to space a few times until it felt right.

Lovely that you have relief from having those house maintenance and upkeep burdens relieved.  New memories will soon be made in your new home.   I feel as you do; God is great.  I never forget to say "thank you" in gratitude each day for all the blessings that have been in life and also for the beloved dear times throughout said life that have made such wonderful memories to be heartfelt recalled.   Sharing some of your memories with us has been touching to read. 

I smile at your husband's watch placed  next to his picture and the alarm the watch played every day at 2:16; truly, very sweet and poignant and the love lives on, never lost.

We will continue to enjoy hearing from you when you feel up to writing and once again, I send warmest thoughts and a soft hug your way,

J.


toni2
Posted: Thursday, July 21, 2022 9:40 AM
Joined: 10/19/2017
Posts: 350


Good morning, everyone. I have found that it is the little things that stick with us when our loved ones are not here anymore, it is good to have the little things. I wondered why I had such a hard time giving away the little things DH had kept and now I know it was because it was a part of him. I brought a few of those things with me.

My daughter told me that she had wanted to move both of us over with them before he broke both his legs but didn't have time to get ready for us. He would have liked that for a while, but he kept saying he wanted to go home, and he was home, but it wasn't his childhood home. That is what he wanted.

I am so thankful for all my friends and family who are taking such good care of me. I have invitations from 2 friends for lunch when I'm up to it. 

I think of you all and pray that you are doing well.