As I walk upon this earthly ground

And see the world from all around

I ponder why you placed me here

Where there is so much, so much to fear

Am I to learn about defeat

To be knocked down from upon my feet

Am I to feel everyone's pain

If I am, am I to feel insane

Why Oh Lord is it so hard to connect

To speak from your heart and feel no respect

Where is the love that I know abounds

Where does it hide in this world on this ground

Life has been a struggle from the moment I came

You placed me here Lord, yet help me keep sane

What a dichotomy I see

In this strange love you have for me

I do not truly understand

But with Faith I will take your hand

And bravely do whatever I can

Added December 27, 2017...

Lord,

Thank you for the chance to live

To experience this world and all it has to give

Thank you for the pain 

I know it has it's place

It's how we learn about Grace

But love Lord, is your driving force

It is what steers our course

So I hold onto love, in a life full of strife

Knowing the course for my life...

Oh Bravo !

This is soooooo true for all of us, I think.

It makes me think of  2nd Corinthians 4: 7-9 , " But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, so that the surpassing greatness of the power will be of God and not from ourselves;  we are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing;  persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed. "

 By the way, lest you think I can quote scripture whenever I want, I had to dig some to find this.

 I will continue to look forward to your postings, Blue Skies, since you clearly have a keen insight, and a profound use of words.

 Thank you,

 Chris

Chris, thank you for the compliments.  I'll try not to let it go to my head  By the way, pretty good digging and thanks for sharing.

BlueSkies,

Thank you.

Your candle illuminates whether you are aware or not.

Tanya

I like the concept, BlueSkies. That your god/creator is so personal. That he’s only a letter away. Or for that matter, that you can speak directly to him. At any time. Especially if it’s an urgent matter. But usually, a letter will suffice. Better that  Because we underestimate how busy a god can be.  I suspect that he has trusted and efficient assistants. To help with the work overload. I’ve found him to be a regular guy. More easy-going and affable than portrayed in the Bible. Jovial. And anything but vindictive. He got a bad rap in the Old Testament. He says he’s trying to get on the same level as the person he’s talking to. Helps everyone relax. He says it’s all right to personalize the relationship.  To fine tune it. To suit one's self. He allows me flexibility. In my approach to him. I prefer a casual relationship. Like he’s one of the guys. One of the gang. But he has no objection to being magisterial. If that’s your preference. Oh, another thing. He has an amazing sense of humor. He encourages me to pursue my dream. To be a stand-up comic some day.. He laughs at my jokes. Not just to be polite. But because he truly thinks that I’m funny. In a weird sort of way. I truly love the guy. And he seems to love me. In fact, he seems to love everyone. Even his enemies. And disbelievers, too. Maybe that’s his greatest asset. He’s a true blue lover. One of a kind. Can't help but be drawn to him. He has my hearty endorsement. I give him rave reviews. --Jim

Yes Jim, he is very personal to me.  I have always loved him from as far back as I can remember.  I always felt as a child that he was my "real" father and that my father here on earth was very nice and loving, but was not the "real" deal.  Ha, I was a strange child, wasn't I. (My parents were not that religious so not sure where that came from.)

 He has gotten me through so many horrid trials with sanity intact.  I have felt his love and actual embrace many times in my life.  Always when I needed it the most.  I am sure some would think me delusional, but I prefer to think I am just more open than others and allow him in. 

And yes, I do know he has a wonderful sense of humor and has made me laugh many times at the situations he has put before me.  He makes himself known in so many different ways.  He is amazing and I agree has gotten a bad rap.  I hope for him that will change in time.  I do believe it will and think the change is beginning to happen right now. 

By the way, he thanks you for his rave reviews. 

 You have keen and carefully tailored insights, Blue Skies. And an open mind. And tolerance of others in the vast world of beliefs. Yes, I like your outlook on life.  It’s refreshing. And makes me smile. You have what it takes to get through troubled times. Faith. --Jim

I am smack dab in the middle of a busy day, but I second everything that Jim said. I mean, of course, what he said this time. Next time he might rub me the wrong way, so I have to be open to switching tracks if I need to.

But this time, spot on !

Off to do some shopping. Can I get you anything ?

Blue Skies, it amazes me how God has time for you, because lately I am keeping him so busy!  What a wonderful God we serve. 

 Today, I am weary again as LO is back to sleeping,  soooo much. I know it is good. But it does not feel good to me. As I read the other thread about therapy and drugs for the caregiver, I began to ask God if it was time for that.  I love to run things by him first and just about every time a solution shows up for me.  My stomach has been weird lately, almost nervous?   I began a vegetarian diet a couple months ago, so I am really trying to do nice things for my body, drugs do not come easy for me. But I am waiting to see what He has in mind.  

Blessings, sharon

Hi Sharon, Yes, what a wonderful God we serve!

Sharon, I to am weary.  I am weary from watching myself decline. I am weary of the struggle to get through each day.  I miss my friend Sun.  I think I will lay my head on God's shoulder tonight.  You can have the other shoulder.  Sending you lots of love and hugs.....

Well, that didn't take long...my stomach and upper back is all gas!

Refux, I got a pill, hoping I feel better.  

Blue Skies do you have any  family near?

I have my husband with me who is my love and my rock. I have two grown children who live far away, but we keep in contact.  I also keep in contact with a brother and sister sporadically. 

What about you?

For the full story go to the thread. "Alone with myself...." infusing.

I have my husband and two of my grown children at home. We just celebrate 44 years of a great life together..

Glad you have family connected to you. I have a couple friends that are like more than family that really encourage us.

I am so glad to see you posting. Your input is a real blessing to me, and to others.

Thanks always,

Chris

I wasn't very clear, was I ? But Jim pegged it correctly. Thanks to Jim for his bottomless well of musings, and to Blue Skies for being absolutely just what your screen name says. After a cloudy day dealing with worldly concerns, it's a pleasure to come here and get  a little Blue Skies !

Chris

Blue Skies , In My deep thinking today;  as a caregiver there are times I need an escape.  To be unaccountable, to be not followed, to be unneeded. Yesterday I went fishing, a half block away.   For 3 hours

.  I was thinking of you and my LO who have no escape. Sleep seems to be my LO's escape of choice, or is it a choice?  I so appreciate your insight as it forces me to see 2 sides instead of just my own.     I find your words comforting, as I know often we just want to see our side of the mirror and not the inside of us. You help me examine the inside. Thanks for that.  Sun 's was one of the first threads I read on this forum

This am I was up early and listened to "Beautiful Name" by Hillsong on utube, outside with the birds. Happy Easter to You!  We have such freedom to celebrate our lives, messy as they are that song says " he didn't want heaven without us, so he sent Jesus down".     This was today's escape along with Worship at church.

Blessings, sharon

Amen to that, Sharon . 'Nuff said !

Chris

Sharon,

 I believe sleep is a "choice" of escape at first, at least it is for me.  I do believe that eventually it will no longer be a choice, but don't know for sure because I'm not there yet.  It seems to make sense though.  

Anyway way, I am so glad you are finding your own ways to escape.  We all have to find our escapes however and wherever we can.

Oh and yes, thank you for the nice compliments. 

Hope you had a wonderful Easter Sharon. (Giving you a big hug

BlueSkies,

I really enjoyed reading your poem. I saw your reply to a poem I wrote where you indicated you had given up writing. I hope you have decided to write again because (A) it can be (is) therapeutic and (B) you are very good at it.

Once again ... I enjoyed your "thought provoking" poem.

One day (one step) at a time.

Regards,
Marc