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contented dementia
Posted: Friday, May 26, 2017 7:10 PM
Joined: 9/12/2013
Posts: 3608

found a copy of Contented Dementia this week so sat down in old massage chair to browse while it rolled out the knots in my back.

I had underlined much of it when I did my reading binge after diagnosis and liked what he was saying. Here is the difference between when I read it back then and now:

One of the main methods in the plan is to NEVER ARGUE with the person. There are very detailed instructions on how to behave in order to make the person with  dementia feel more normal and less likely to become upset. 

So I am reading that section and he goes over "never argue", "trying to make conversation", and how "to get their attention" etc. and really studying this and getting very mentally exhausted.

Then I realized for 20 pages I thought he was telling people WITH dementia how to get their caregiver to cooperate better! Ha! I was thinking "I will try this with Keeper" or "I will remember this for when I speak to my son," and it all made sense!

So I am sitting there with the rollers going up and down the sides of my spine and laughing to myself and thinking what is good for people with dementia is good in general with anybody.

Keeper says I am "very bright" lately, very cheerful, enthusiastic even if screwing things up. My friend who I walked with today said I seemed "radiant". This condition is not a nightmare for me, maybe it will be one day but for now I do feel like I am free of many former constraints and living out a childhood I never had.

love and courage

Posted: Friday, May 26, 2017 7:22 PM
Joined: 12/2/2015
Posts: 1018

Alz+, I think you have found the secret for you to have some happiness and contentment. Good for you, and I mean it. I don't think I can do it, but I will continue to try. I am getting worse with the passing of every month. I don't see things change day to day, but on a month to month I can really see the difference. I need to forget all of this and focus on the here and now, and make the best of it. Bill.