Joined: 9/8/2017
Posts: 2325
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My father’s decline
during 2017 was drastic. But since early
2018, when he became non-ambulatory, his changes have been subtle. His latest subtle change is his cooperation when
I’m brushing his teeth. It’s…a battle
now. I try to be patient, but I want to finish
him up so I can shower and finish the day.
Relax on my bed. Of course, more
diaper changes will follow.
Anyway, lately I’ve
been purchasing these more frequently: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00805NCG6/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o09_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
He bites down hard on
these over and over (munch munch munch), and the foam is not lasting much
anymore. The tip of the foam tears off
and the popsicle stick inside is exposed.
I replace the mouth rest so he doesn’t end up biting into the popsicle
stick, causing a splinter.
“Open your mouth…that’s
good!...No NO, leave your mouth open….okay….NO…okay…don’t bite….okay….STOP!”
And he doesn’t stop chit chatting, while barely opening his mouth…..I try not to shove the mouth rest into his mouth. And when I succeed inserting
the mouth rest, twist, the mouth rest gets destroyed again. Then I try to use the other end, but it
widens his mouth more and he gets pissed off at me….
“Sabes que?! Ya
estoy harto!” translate “You know what?! I’ve had enough!”
or
“Me vas a matar!” translate “You’re going to kill me!”
And then he pushes my hands away as he’s very pissed off. We still
finish the brushing after a few arguments, and I manage to freshen his mouth. But, I know someday that will
end. I guess I’m just trying to keep up
with his hygiene as long as possible.
***
Dad finally got discharged from
Hospice. There was a slight confusion on
my part, I guess. At first, the plan was
to discharge, then the care manager called and said no discharge. So, I assumed another 3 months. However, the Doc stopped by the Friday before
last Friday, checked him, told me one more week for them to monitor his blood
pressure with the added prescription, and then home health per my request.
That’s okay. I mean, like, Medicare was getting charged
arms and legs. For a non-dying dad. I mean, he still flirts for God’s sake! Even with me.
So, the Doc said, “….to be
brutally honest, what we’re doing for him (referring to the added
prescription) isn’t going to make it better for him but it’s not going to
make it worse for him either...that’s just how it is…did you stop the treatment
for the prostate?”
I said yes. And I asked him what the recent lab results
showed of my father’s PSA level? Or did it get checked?
He said it doesn’t matter. And,
“And your dad is not like this (demonstrating
with his arm extended out in front of himself, hand flat, horizontally sweeping downward indicating a decline).
He’s going like this (arm
extended out, hand moving horizontally flat across). And that can go for a
loooonnnng time.”
I had a several drinks that evening.
I hope dad doesn’t outlive me.
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