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Elder Attorney vs Advanced Directive?
Posted: Monday, October 31, 2022 6:42 PM
Joined: 10/31/2022
Posts: 15

My DW has EO at 52.  I would like to make sure things are in order while she is still able to.  She is willing to sign an Advanced Directive with a notary public that I got from her primary doctor.  Is that the same thing as what an Elder Attorney would do to give me power of attorney? 

I'm very happy that there is so much useful information on this site.

Michael Ellenbogen
Posted: Tuesday, November 8, 2022 11:55 AM
Joined: 11/30/2011
Posts: 4456

A lot has to do with what her wishes are. If she wants to die before this disease takes her out she needs a special AD.

Posted: Saturday, December 3, 2022 10:29 PM
Joined: 12/15/2021
Posts: 45

Hi Suka9,  My DW has EO FTD since age 54, she's 59 now.  I sent you an invite if you want to exchange thoughts. I'm also in a male spousal support group for caregivers as well, been very helpful.  As for me, I opted to go with a DPOA, includes AMD, moved onto obtaining Guardianship as well. These past 5 years have been stressful and challenging and will be placing DW in Assisted Living Facility this month.  Good luck to you and feel free to reach out.
Posted: Wednesday, December 7, 2022 5:08 PM
Joined: 7/17/2020
Posts: 325

Shortly after my wife was diagnosed, we contacted a lawyer and set up the following:

Durable Power of Attorney - DPOA - Giving me control of her resources in the event that she was shown to be medically unable to control them on her own. 

Medical Directive - A legal document that contains instructions to be followed regarding a person’s health care decisions if they should become incapacitated. If a person becomes incapacitated, they may not be able to make and communicate their own decisions about medical treatment.      

Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act – HIPAA - Authorizes who has access to your personal health information. 

We both set up Wills and established a Revokable Trust.

Posted: Wednesday, December 21, 2022 3:08 PM
Joined: 12/17/2017
Posts: 57

Hi Suka9:

I encourage you to find an elder law attorney in your area, but an advance directive is as the others have rightly said. Arrowhead gave a good overview of the kinds of things a good elder law attorney will prepare. A durable power of attorney can cover a wide range of things, including financial affairs and medical decisions. In addition to these documents, an elder law attorney will be able to help you set up your affairs and give you legal advice if at some point funds fall short and you need to arrange for Medicaid (Medicare does not cover long term care, for example). Even if your situation is such that your LO may not need Medicaid coverage for some number of years, the advice you get should help you in the event they do. I was surprised by some of the recommendations I received, but all of them ended up working in my DWs favor---and mine.

The elder law attorney I consulted prepared new wills for both of us, along with advance directives, the powers-of-attorney (in my state, a separate one is required for medical decisions), and so on.

You should know that any fees you spend for an elder law attorney can be deducted from any assets you will be required to spend down if Medicaid is needed. Medicaid is a very tricky last-resort solution, with a lot of pitfalls and my attorney showed me scenarios where poor planning became very costly. Best wishes on this difficult and sometimes frustrating part of the journey. 

Posted: Tuesday, January 3, 2023 10:21 PM
Joined: 9/15/2022
Posts: 12

Hi, my wife is 57 and she's been disagnosed with EO AD last year. However I suspect it's been going on for much longer, probably 5-6 years, just not taken seriously. 

I'd like to connect and talk if possible. I need to understand better my options with Assisted Care as I'm still working and need to work for a while.

Hope to be in touch.


Posted: Tuesday, January 3, 2023 10:35 PM
Joined: 9/15/2022
Posts: 12

Hi, what the difference between General POA and Durable POA? Can somebody please recommend an Elder Attorney in Atlanta, GA?
Jo C.
Posted: Wednesday, January 4, 2023 3:49 AM
Joined: 12/9/2011
Posts: 13593

Hello Feel Sad.  There is a lot of information that can be found on Google regarding the difference between a General Power of Attorney versus a Durable Power of Attorney.

Overall; a General Power of Attorney ends  the moment a person becomes incapacitated.  The Durable Power of Attorney stays in place even when there is incapacitation, and is effective until the person making the DPOA has died or has revoked the power of attorney they had previously granted.  This is a general overview; it is always best to obtain one's advice from an actual attorney.

I would like to suggest that you go to the top of this page to the prompt, "Message Boards."  Click on that.  You will find the prompt for the, "Spousal and Partner" Forum.  Click on that. It will lead you to the very robust Forum that is very welcoming with much support and experiential wisdom.   Members there have a variety of different onsets of different types of dementia.  Some have Loved Ones (LOs) with early onset, some later onset; some have been on the Forum for a long time and have much good input on a very broad array of topics; you can Post anything you wish and you will get responses and support.




Posted: Wednesday, January 4, 2023 5:50 PM
Joined: 10/31/2022
Posts: 15

Thank you for all the comments.  I have pursued an elder attorney and will be getting DPOA soon!
Posted: Wednesday, January 4, 2023 9:13 PM
Joined: 9/15/2022
Posts: 12

Thank you, Jo C, will follow your advice.