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Posted: Friday, September 6, 2019 7:41 AM
Joined: 5/8/2018
Posts: 50

The delusion my DH had upon waking this morning was to me beyond unbelievable. He got up around 4am., wandered over to the bathroom I was right behind him. I knew his Abena brief was soaked because he had slept about 3 hours without getting up.  I asked him to please sit on the toilet so I could change it and his PJ’s.  He looked right through me accusing me of burning babies. I have never seen that look on his face before.  Telling me he could not believe the blue eyed muffin he married and loved for so long would do that. I was going to be judged and would burn in hell.  I stood there  frozen and honestly frightened.  After about an hour I persuaded him to go back in bed, even though he was still wet along with the pad that’s on the bed.  I covered him and said I love you. He sat up and hissed in my face and threw the covers off...he said I was burying him.  I left the bedroom sobbing.  This dear gentle giant has never ever spoken to me in a nasty tone or has he ever raised a hand at me.  As I’m writing this I’m still shaking and my heart hurts.  I had to many of you have it so must rougher then me and when I read your posts my heart hurts for you. I pray tonight is a better night.
Posted: Friday, September 6, 2019 10:53 AM
Joined: 4/2/2018
Posts: 2766

This is beyond terrible! Sorry you are dealing with this. An abrupt change always leaves me wondering if there might be a UTI. It might be worth checking it out, and having it done with a culture. I know UTIs are less of a problem with men, but it is still worth considering.
Posted: Friday, September 6, 2019 11:30 AM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 11662

Mimi, I know how frightening that must have been.  I think it may happen with many alz. patients.  It did happen with Charles a couple of times - no warning, just out of the blue and in a little while it was over.  I don't know why it happens - wish we did so we could do something to control it.  Maybe, hopefully, this will resolve soon and he'll be back to his normal self.  Stay away from him until it's over.  I remember once I spent a couple of hours in the PU out of the house - - another time he came up behind my chair and put a belt around my neck.  I thought he was kidding so said "what are you going to do, choke me? and he said yes.  It was over in just a minute and he was back to normal.  We have to expect the unexpected - and I know it's hard.
Posted: Friday, September 6, 2019 12:51 PM
Joined: 12/31/2018
Posts: 389

Mimi2, I'm so sorry this is happening. I can hear the shock in your post. I would feel the same way as my DH has also been very loving and gentle, and anything like that would be so out of character for him as well. Stay safe! Praying for you both!
Jo C.
Posted: Friday, September 6, 2019 1:50 PM
Joined: 12/9/2011
Posts: 10762

What a stunning shock for you; I am truly sorry.   Ed may be on to something.  I would have your DH checked for one of those "silent" urinary tract infections; they can cause significant changes in behavior.

Also, if he takes a med to help sleep at night, he may have been a bit "med hung over" in confusion which may be new.

If this goes away, what a relief; but if it persists or repeats itself, it would warrant a trip to your DHs dementia specialist.

Let us know how it is going, we will be thinking of you.


Dreamer Lost
Posted: Friday, September 6, 2019 1:59 PM
Joined: 3/7/2019
Posts: 448

Omg! Mimi, I am so sorry this happened to you.  My DH has also never raised his voice or made remarks such as that so know it is the disease talking and not your LO.  Maybe he heard something on the news or tv or had a nightmare and is transferring it to you. Maybe a UTI. Please talk with his physician and  stay safe and take care of yourself.
Posted: Friday, September 6, 2019 5:20 PM
Joined: 5/8/2018
Posts: 50 oh scary in just a second he could have snapped your neck.  

Thankfully, today he had an appointment with his PCP. I emailed the doctor in advance with not only this episode but with other changes that have been occurring.  The doctor took a urine sample and said he’ll have a urinalysis and a culture run as well.  

Jo C...he doesn’t take any sleep meds other then Melatonin 3mg.  Thank you all! 

Posted: Friday, September 6, 2019 11:48 PM
Joined: 5/7/2018
Posts: 425

He may have had a nightmare and mixed you up in it. Many people have nightmares with melatonin. My husband has delusions like that but he usually doesn't know who I am. I am usually someone he doesn't know or someone out to hurt him. Often, out of the blue, he will ask me why I would do that to him. I have no idea what "that" is, and when I ask, he says, "You know." He also says he told me things or that we had conversations we never had. He is better on risperodone, which is an anti psychotic. He takes two trazadones for sleep at night. They do help keep him asleep. We are not at the incontinent stage yet. Maybe ask his doctor for the trazmadone. Remember he can't help these things. It is the disease talking. If I took to heart all the things my DH says to me, I would be suicidal.