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Magic Words from the APS Social Worker
Iris L.
Posted: Sunday, February 26, 2012 5:53 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 16444

After a referral from an Alzheimer's Association Care Consultant, I had a visit from Adult Protective Services.  The social worker who visited me gave me some advice that has helped me, when I can remember it.  He told me two things.  1.  I have to learn to let go of things.  2.  I have to give up multitasking.   


Both advices are crucial for my functioning.  In the five years I have been complaining of trouble functioning, not a single professional, including the twenty-five doctors I have consulted, have given me this advice.  But I find it is necessary for me to get anything done around my home or for myself.   


I have been upset recently because it seems that my functioning is declining.  Part of the decline is due to physical factors but I need to be aware of cognitive factors that I can exhibit some control over. 


Iris L. 

Posted: Sunday, February 26, 2012 6:38 PM
Joined: 12/8/2011
Posts: 33

Thanks for sharing this Iris....I am still beating myself up about things I can't let go of and for not being able to multitask anymore....but it's just okay isn't it? it is what it is......It's a relief to just let go.....thanks!!

PS Glad you are here!

Iris L.
Posted: Sunday, February 26, 2012 8:01 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 16444

That's what I have to keep telling myself, Tonya.  It's okay.   


Today I did two loads of laundry in the laundry room.  I had to coach myself through every step.  Something that seems so simple has become a project.  


I lost four quarters in one of the dryers--that alone could have derailed this chore.  But I was able to let it go, and continue until I finished.  But I still have to match my socks and put them away.


 Everything is so hard now.


Iris L. 

Posted: Sunday, February 26, 2012 8:43 PM
Joined: 12/5/2011
Posts: 795


You are a survivor!  You show me daily how to get through one thing then go to another.

You remind me ONE task at a time.  It's OK.  I am still working on that every day.  I can't believe how hard some tasks have become.  I am forced to take them on step at a time.

Yesterday, was a good day.

Today was NOT a good day.  My mind raced and I couldn't keep thoughts together so I took a nap.  I feel a little better with the exception of a headache.

I will now take some ibuprofen for the headache.

Thanks for everything, Iris.

Peace and Hope,


Posted: Monday, February 27, 2012 4:34 PM
Joined: 11/29/2011
Posts: 514

Iris, Tonya, & Lisa,

What great words of advice!  We don't have to be multi-taskers!  I think we can give each other (and everyone else here) a free pass!

It's just GREAT to have each other!

Posted: Monday, February 27, 2012 6:19 PM
Joined: 1/3/2012
Posts: 189

There are 3 ways of doing things you use to do, and get the satiafaction of the achevement. Doing it like you use to, doing it diferently, not doing it. The first two are acomlish the same gold. Hay a cregiver is ma maid, just don't call one that LOL; Set up automadic payments with your bank, lots of non memory empaired people do; and have the made do the laundry. Caregiver come free with Sicial Security. I say if upper income people do this whay not me. It's all on your atadude.

Not Spoiled!

Mimi S.
Posted: Monday, February 27, 2012 6:58 PM
Joined: 11/29/2011
Posts: 7035

Hi all,


Yep, one thing at a time. And if I start thinking about what else has to be done, I jot it done, then I can let go of it.

And what can we do to simplify our life? Will the world really come to an end if we wear our slacks or shirt a second day?


Iris, I hope your new person works out.  You are a very special person and your worker has to understand that. You've probably forgotten more in the past five years than I ever knew.


 And you still have much to offer. Have you ever had any luck finding someone in the AD chat room?

Iris L.
Posted: Monday, February 27, 2012 10:55 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 16444

Thank you all for the words of encouragement.  It's rare for me to find encouragement.  The people in my life give me conflicting messages.  I need to block the negative words and platitudes. 


I visit the chat room often in the evenings.  There used to be several patients who visited the chat room.  Now it's all caregivers.  I appreciate their company but I don't want to overstay my welcome.  I feel I need to give them their space. 


Iris L. 

Mimi S.
Posted: Wednesday, February 29, 2012 6:50 PM
Joined: 11/29/2011
Posts: 7035

Iris, try posting a notice on the boards (both EO and regular). Pick a time that's convenient for you, but also possible for us Easterners. Give us a few days notice, and post a few times. See who shows up.
 I'll try.