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Brother(1)
ssb60
Posted: Sunday, June 10, 2018 1:34 AM
Joined: 11/13/2016
Posts: 14


I posted awhile ago about brother. 61 yo, 9/11 first responder at Pentagon, PTSD, Bi-polar. I've been trying for months to apply for early social security benefits for him and don't seem to have the energy. At this point, I almost feel like, why bother. His decline has been so rapid. In a year went from living on his own to 24/7 memory care. WTH??? Where will he be in 6 mos when, perhaps, social security will come thru??? 
Earlier there was an issue with his meds. He was combative so risperidone was increased and also other meds added. Too much meds and he went downhill fast. Honestly thought he would be dead at any time. He lost 30 lbs in a month. Meds were reduced and he stabilized, tho, he's started to decline again. His communication is limited, but I can usually figure out what he's trying to say. He seems to have delusions, but he doesn't seem too distressed by them.  

He still remembers me. New thing is that he cries when he sees me and is so thankful that I'm there. Tonight he said, thank God you're here, I thought you died!!!! I saw him couple of times today. I've started telling him that even tho I leave, I will always come back. 

I'm just venting. I know everyone here understands and is dealing. Today was hard and I feel really vulnerable. I changed his soiled clothes, cleaned him up, cut his toenails and dressed him. It doesn't bother me other than remembering that at one time he was a 20+ years fireman, search and rescue volunteer, independent, vibrant man. That breaks my heart. Thank you.


Horse Lover
Posted: Sunday, June 10, 2018 5:18 PM
Joined: 11/4/2017
Posts: 124


I'm so sorry that you are going through all of this and that he is going through it too.  Always feel free to come here.  I'm listening and I know others are listening too.  Bless you for being his guardian angel.
MissHer
Posted: Sunday, June 10, 2018 9:39 PM
Joined: 11/13/2014
Posts: 2186


I'm also so sorry! The disease sucks and it's so heartbreaking. I feel for everyone fighting the battle. You sure can come to the Caregiver Board here and join us caregivers.
eaglemom
Posted: Monday, June 11, 2018 11:14 PM
Joined: 3/7/2012
Posts: 2375


This is why we're here, to help you help your brother. It is so difficult to see those whom we love change. With the rapid changes your seeing, that has to be frightening, to the both of you.

Your doing the right thing & I'm sorry your going through this.

eagle


leilani
Posted: Wednesday, June 20, 2018 12:17 PM
Joined: 8/6/2016
Posts: 323


ssb60 wrote:
I posted awhile ago about brother. 61 yo, 9/11 first responder at Pentagon, PTSD, Bi-polar. I've been trying for months to apply for early social security benefits for him and don't seem to have the energy. At this point, I almost feel like, why bother. His decline has been so rapid. In a year went from living on his own to 24/7 memory care. WTH??? Where will he be in 6 mos when, perhaps, social security will come thru??? 
 
Earlier there was an issue with his meds. He was combative so risperidone was increased and also other meds added. Too much meds and he went downhill fast. Honestly thought he would be dead at any time. He lost 30 lbs in a month. Meds were reduced and he stabilized, tho, he's started to decline again. His communication is limited, but I can usually figure out what he's trying to say. He seems to have delusions, but he doesn't seem too distressed by them.  

He still remembers me. New thing is that he cries when he sees me and is so thankful that I'm there. Tonight he said, thank God you're here, I thought you died!!!! I saw him couple of times today. I've started telling him that even tho I leave, I will always come back. 

I'm just venting. I know everyone here understands and is dealing. Today was hard and I feel really vulnerable. I changed his soiled clothes, cleaned him up, cut his toenails and dressed him. It doesn't bother me other than remembering that at one time he was a 20+ years fireman, search and rescue volunteer, independent, vibrant man. That breaks my heart. Thank you.

(((hugs)))
My LO, who is my older sister is the same age. She was once an Assistant Professor who taught Transportation. It breaks my heart that she isn't able to express herself verbally anymore. I'm heart broken that she is becoming an infant and there isn't anything I can do to change it.