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Does the president election have anything to do with the attitude change on this website?
Michael Ellenbogen
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 6:58 AM
Joined: 11/30/2011
Posts: 2483


I have seen a change not only on this site but all over in people’s attitudes in the last few months. While I may not be happy with the results with the election that does not change that the person elected is our president. I am so proud to live in this country and would not have it any other way. I am a immigrant. I came here legally at age 5 and now a US citizen. I have had the luxury to travel all over the world and every time I come back I could kiss the ground here because it is the best place by far to be. I hear so many people complain about how bad things are. They really should visit other countries. They attitude will change. And for those who really don’t like it her  no one is forcing you to stay here. Sure we have problems and issues but we are still a great place. We need to come together on so many ways so we can improve all our lives and especially those with dementia as al this negativity is hurting all our progress. Let’s all take a breath and be nicer to each other.  


julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 7:19 AM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


I have to admit that yes it has affected me what happened in this election.. I have to admit that I am full of anxiety that I have not had in years because of what is going on in this country.. I do not have the perspective of having gone to other countries and only have my personal experience to build on. I understand that others feel that we must work together to bring about the best for this country but in reality many of us are too far gone for that.. Until someone steps forward to make it better it will unfortunately remain that we are worried and upset. You have to keep in mind that many of us are wondering and dreading the fact that the other party wants to take away our health insurance and how that will affect everyone..
julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 7:51 AM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


My anxiety attacks are making my athsema worse too.. which makes my anxiety attacks worse.
abeautifulwaytolive
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 9:19 AM
Joined: 8/17/2015
Posts: 86


Politics, particularly now, when so many who are living with dementia and are disabled may be cut off of their health insurance, is an upsetting subject.  Most members of this forum work really hard in order to not bring politics into the forum.

However, you would obviously see little wrong since you are a white male. That is what we call privilege... you should google "white privilege" and check it out.

My mom did a great thing for us: she took us all over the world.  I have seen first hand that most developed countries are similar, if not more advanced, than ours. Third world countries are also not nearly as bad as our news makes them out to be.  All over the world, people are people. They all love their children and they all want to be safe. Seeing the way people are in other countries, and seeing the news in other countries, showed me in a way that no one telling me could do justice to: that we are not as advanced as other developed countries. My mom taught us that there are just some things that you have to see for yourself.

So yes, some of you (particularly wealthy white men), have the luxury of turning a blind eye. That is what we call "privilege " in this country. In fact that's the very epitome of privilege.  But the rest of us have to live with what this new administration is doing.  In that, we are hurting, scared, and trying very hard to see the best in others, and hope that someone will remove him from office quickly, before he destroys our beautiful country.  

But this is why we don't talk about politics on here.

 


Lane Simonian
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 10:09 AM
Joined: 12/12/2011
Posts: 4565


For quite a few people there has been a negative health effect from this election: insomnia, stress, anxiety, and helplessness among others.  The fear of losing health insurance, the fear of being deported, the fear of being subject to physical or verbal attack because of ones ethnicity or religion are real and pervasive fears.  And unfortunately, I think that some people now feel the license to attack vulnerable populations taking their lead from the president despite some rare occasions of better rhetoric.   Treating people with kindness and respect seems to be going by the wayside.
julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 10:15 AM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


My therapist has told me that he has many clients that are terrified of getting deported and they can not focus on anything else.. People are afraid! Very afraid.. Not to mention that half of the Hispanic population in the town we shop at every weekend is up and missing.. They used to be well represented when we were shopping before but now the store is full of white people. I just shake my head because I can not believe the cruelty that is going on.
jfkoc
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 10:41 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 17275


 I will use whatever  I might have to open as many doors possible to effect as much change as I can.

 


julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 10:45 AM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


I would hope that looking around that there are many things to be sad about in this country. There are many things going wrong all at once here in this country.. I see that there are many people in other countries where things are bad for the people but this is bad for us at this time too.. I hope you can see that.
Unforgiven
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 10:49 AM
Joined: 1/28/2013
Posts: 2551


I think that all of us, no matter what our ethnicity or gender are nervous about the effects that repeal of the ACA will have on us.  I live in the Rust Belt, in Wisconsin where the one silver lining in the cloud is that we can't fear the loss of Medicaid expansion, because our Governor never expanded it in the first place.

But the answer is not to pull apart and take sides.  If Michael can gain the ear of the President and speak about the challenges of dementia, particularly at a young age before Medicare has been reached, then I say go for it.  Many people have not been unemployed or underemployed from the ages of 50 to 65, when a health insurance plan is simply too expensive to pay for on one's own.  This has to be explained to those who never went through it.


julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 10:56 AM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


I agree that if Michael can talk with Trump that would be a good thing but one thing he needs to remember is that Trump is a yes man who will say yes to anything someone in a meeting with him says but then changes his mind when the next person talks to him about the same subject.. You can not win with someone like this.. I could have put this better.. What  I mean is that he has a need to be liked by people he is meeting with and will say what you want to hear.. I feel sorry for him because as president you can not do that because it is not a popularity contest being president.. Just ask Obama who was unpopular with a good portion of this country for the 8 years he was in.
julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 11:08 AM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


I want to thank you Michael for posting this because I was holding onto this for months and it is hard to live in fear for that long without it taking it's toll.
Unforgiven
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 12:00 PM
Joined: 1/28/2013
Posts: 2551


My biggest worry about Donald Trump is that he may not be strong enough to stand uo to Paul Ryan and the rest of the GOP Congress the recent election swept in. As a person, Trump does seem to be easily influenced, for example announcing that the ACA would not be repealed without a replacement ready at hand.  The problem is Congress, who are asked to produce a racehorse and end up giving us a five-legged camel that spits.

Please do not get me started on what is wrong with our entire system of healthcare delivery, but I got much better care when I was without insurance and paid out of pocket for my preventive care.  In fact, the last time the true art of medicine was given to me was over thirty years ago in the office of an internist who had his own solo practice.  They all work for corporations now and haven't the time to spend on any patient.


julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 12:12 PM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


I have fought my way out of thinking that all Trump voters voted for him due to race but it was a hard fight.. I understand at this point that he spoke to them in a way that they had not heard in a long time and are not evil people who are racist to their core.. I find it hard to believe though that some of what he said about muslim's did not turn them off as it did me.. I find it hard to believe that they heard about what he plans for Mexicans who are here illegally did not make them want to turn up their noses at him. I knew for instance that when he said the bad ones and the ones who are criminals he was talking about every undocumented Mexican because they just by being here are breaking the law.. That he meant to deport all Mexicans here illegally. It did not take a rocket scientist to know that.


alz+
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 12:29 PM
Joined: 9/12/2013
Posts: 3526


I don't understand the tension from whatever cause that seems like some people have an Enemies List. 

Maybe the post-election uncertainty adds to board eruptions, but then again I only remember the last one involving my own faux pas a month ago. What I learned from that is I become territorial and one day felt I was supposed to tell someone else how to be more congenial or something. It was a mistake on a few levels, not my job to police anyone else.

What would end the tension regardless of cause? Is there tension? 

Glad Michael asked about this. 

Lack of health insurance breaks millions of people a year, a legitimate visceral fear. Fake news and the lack of response from leadership towards the angry folks who feel unconstrained now about their racist activity is causing a lot of distress.

Rudeness between members just doesn't belong here no matter the real or perceived provocation.



julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 12:35 PM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


Alz, what you need to remember is that fear at this level of humanity gets put everywhere. No one meant to bring it here but when you live with it all day everyday it is going to be deposited everywhere. It is unfortunate but it is human nature and can not be denied at this level. I am not making excuses for it coming out of me but I am trying to explain how difficult it is to ignore when it is this bad. We are in for trying times and to leave it at the door is impossible when something is mentioned about Michael going to meet with to a huge degree the one you are living in fear of.
jfkoc
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 12:59 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 17275


Going back to Michael's question, I answer no. I do not think that the presidential election caused an attitude change on this site. 


julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 1:06 PM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


All I am going to say is it changed me and I can not help but bring that change with me into this site.
abeautifulwaytolive
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 1:22 PM
Joined: 8/17/2015
Posts: 86


The country is divided between those who listen to fake news and see nothing wrong with what is going on, and those who do see everything that is wrong with what is going on. 

Most people in this forum make a tremendous effort to alter what they say and post in order to leave politics out of this forum.   Indeed, it is one thing if caregivers want to talk about it in our forums, but should realize that it has a greater and more devastating affect on those living with dementia who cannot brush it off as easily and are directly impacted by the changes.  

My mom saw this forum as a safe haven from facebook, where the news feed was continuously about the devastating changes this administration was making. 

I agree with Julie, it is very hard to ignore the politics going on in the world when people post about it and will not let it go even when the moderators close the threads down.

There are those who will evoke and enjoy their privilege of not having to see or think about those who are hurt by the policy changes, just as there will be those who care about those being hurt.  The country is divided over this, and when we bring it here, those who voted for this disaster and those who didn't will become evident and it will divide the forum as it has the country.  

This last election has changed us all, and Julie is right. This election has changed us as a people and as a country. Authentic people are who they are everywhere. They don't change their values to suit others.


julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 2:09 PM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


We do not like being lied to and Trump does this all of the time.
jfkoc
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 2:27 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 17275


The threads were closed and posts were deleted because someone was being attacked not because people were talking about healthcare and the advocacy thereof.  

I have been asked by many PWD to share information about what is going on and how one can take action. I try to  be clear about the content of any thread I start.  Actually the content of most threads is made clear by the topic. We  can then avoid the subjects we do not want to be involved in. 

Healthcare in our country affects us all. Can't we just talk about it together and not get divided into groups. Let's work together, PWD and CG and let's not exclude those who are neither. Surely the more advocates we have the better chance we have  to achieve the goal of good healthcare. 

 


julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 2:34 PM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


Michael is going to talk to the man who said he would cover everyone with healthcare and it was expected that we would all get on board with him going and talking to this same man who would not know the truth if it fell on him.. Why go and talk to him? He is going to tell Michael what he thinks he wants to hear and it will be a lie.. That is all that man does.. I understand that people want things to get done for the dementias but until we get someone in there that can be trusted nothing will get done. It does not matter if his father died of dementia either because Trump does not care for anyone that is not himself.
julielarson
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 3:44 PM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


To those of you who are using marijuana for dementia keep this in mind, because we have a man who Trump put in as attorney general who is against all marijuana you could lose your ability to use it for yourself or for the person you care for. Remember that when you think of this new regime.
Iris L.
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 4:19 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 16104


To answer Michael's question, I don't think the election has anything to do with the change on this board.  The changes began long before the election.  When I joined this board eight years ago, we were cautioned not to discuss politics or religion, because it could destroy the board.  That is still the case today.  I am deeply troubled by what I am reading in this thread.   People have different political opinions.  IMO, I don't think we can discuss politics without offending a number of members and starting arguments.


Iris L.


Mimi S.
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 6:54 PM
Joined: 11/29/2011
Posts: 7036


Iris,

 

I agree although Michael's aim was to speak with the President.

 

When we attend the Al. Forum in DC, the topic of party affiliation is not relevant. In fact, in our prep sessions, we are taught to stick to the subject: Advocacy for AD.
Iris L.
Posted: Wednesday, March 15, 2017 9:01 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 16104


I am totally in favor of Michael speaking with the President.  


Iris L.
alz+
Posted: Thursday, March 16, 2017 7:10 AM
Joined: 9/12/2013
Posts: 3526


Wishing Michael - and all of us - great success in getting to speak to Trump or anyone who can provide some relief to those who need it.

This is wonderful. Since Trump's dad had ALZ it might make more of an impact. I know the other candidate spoke of finding a way to support families caring for disabled children or parents. The fear of going broke over a long decline creates real life misery, forces people to make awful decisions.

I hope Michael and others include the need for help now in addition to more funding for research and drug remedies.

Hope we get a photo of them discussing this!


llee08032
Posted: Thursday, March 16, 2017 8:20 AM
Joined: 5/20/2014
Posts: 4406


The shock of the election results is wearing off and reality is setting in. 

However, the rude, disrespectful and provocative attitude and behavior on this board all started way before the election. One should not feel pressured to always have to defend what they post or have it pointed out to them in a way that is demeaning. To be made to feel like they are responsible for all the wrongs done to PWD. The hair splitting and policing of posts by self designated authority persons on the board is changing the tone and atmosphere from supportive to competitive and one up man ship. 

The majority of us here on the board are baby boomers who set the trails blazing for all kinds of changes and advocacy around the world. Consequently, were always told and reminded about what is wrong with the system, dementia care, the treatment of PWD, how to live well, the stigma etc. None of us disagree with this. But it's the way in which we are told and scolded. Like were ignorant to all the injustices. Baby boomers are not idiots and we did not just come out of a cocoon somewhere. Trust me if anyone "get's it" we do. 

When we are talked down to like children on this board that is stigma. 

We don't need to be told about our caste in society or  told to google what it mean to be "privileged." We're the one's who coined the phrase "privileged" and brought it to light in seeking justice. We are called "boomers" for good reason. We boomed and rocked the world more than any ohter generation. Lest not forget that.

Myparents couldn't afford a car or a telephone. We ate fried macaroni all the time. God blessed this child who got her own. I am the matriarch of my family and the first to goto college and university. I am not ashamed to say that many of my family members were and are illiterate. 

Michael is still booming and rocking! I don't understand how this makes some persons jealous. I don't understand this know-it-all-ism here on the board. I don't understand why some of us are being looked down on and treated like our heads screw off. 

None of us on the board are less than the other. I am tired of being scolded and disrespected and seeing ohters treated likewise. I know sh-- too! We all know sh--. 



llee08032
Posted: Thursday, March 16, 2017 8:24 AM
Joined: 5/20/2014
Posts: 4406


Editing were to we're.
julielarson
Posted: Thursday, March 16, 2017 8:41 AM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


I have said my piece and am moving on.. I will not be talking about this anymore on this board. Thank you to all who have seen what I said and heard me..
jfkoc
Posted: Thursday, March 16, 2017 11:25 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 17275


julie...I too hear you 

 

Beautiful...I do not see how this can be a safe place when there are continual attacks of other members. Have drunk the kool aid? 
I assume you have me in the "have drunk" column. If so I would welcome the opportunity to discuss my views with you. I will not do it here but would certainly accept invitation to do so privately. I think we probably have more things in common than not and it would be nice to get to know you better.

julielarson
Posted: Thursday, March 16, 2017 11:36 AM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


I do not know if they drank the koolaid but I do know for the most part they are good people who are trying to make the best out of a bad situation.. That is my take on it anyway.
ALZConnected Moderator
Posted: Thursday, March 16, 2017 11:38 AM
Joined: 8/17/2011
Posts: 156


 To ensure that ALZConnected remains a positive and supportive environment, the Alzheimer’s Association reserves the right to remove any post or thread that is deemed unsupportive or unconstructive to the community. When posting on this thread please adhere to the user-guidelines below. Violation of these guidelines may result in Moderator action to lock or delete the thread.

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Andy59
Posted: Thursday, March 16, 2017 1:57 PM
Joined: 12/30/2016
Posts: 75


I don't post often on this forum, but I do read the threads everyday, and I have not noticed a change.

Personally, I'm happy that a non politician won.


Rennbird
Posted: Thursday, March 16, 2017 9:47 PM
Joined: 2/23/2017
Posts: 50


Dementia is the equal opportunity disease.  You could say that Ronald Reagan was a recipient of white male privilege but it made no difference to the dementia rats that ate up his brain.  We are all in this together and we are where we are.  Read some American history.  It will cheer you up.  Nothing changes through the generations.  Human nature is often not at its best but that does not mean we should give up.
llee08032
Posted: Friday, March 17, 2017 10:22 AM
Joined: 5/20/2014
Posts: 4406


Veryhappy to see that this thread did not ahve to get locked down. It's nice to express ourselves w/o anyone getting hurt or feeling like their opinion is not as important as the next person. We all count. 

Advice, information sharing, being supportive  and educating others is all about the tone, the delivery and the presentation. It's not about making others to feel that theyare inferior, ignorant  or stupid. Preachingtochiorwhen  the choir already knows the information doesn't work. Telling, scolding and pointing out what one thinks is flawed in the others thinking is a big turn off. 

I've read American Hx as I'm sure others here have also. I was a voracious reader of everything before dx. One of our distinguished members on the board here may even be an educator of American Hx (I think)? I respectfully disagree that not mcuh has changed.

I strongly intuit, and I think there is someone on the board with multiple screen names? It makes me feel vulnerable and I would like to be wrong about this! Is it possible that someone could come to the board lurking and set up multiple accounts under different screen names? Please tell me if you think I amy just be paranoid? Were saturated with media talking about hacking these days. Perhaps I have just reason to be paranoid? Nevertheless, I don't think I would want to stay on the board if there are lurkers with mulile accounts trying to harass others. 

Am I wrong for thinking this way?