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Alzheimer's and understanding
Mleast
Posted: Saturday, February 16, 2019 11:37 AM
Joined: 2/9/2019
Posts: 4


Hi everyone! I just joined, I felt I needed some people in my life to understand what I am going through. It is hard being younger with Alzheimers, I found that when I was diagnosed and was no longer able to work, the people I thought were my friends disappeared. So I have become a diagnosis not a person any longer and I sit here most days alone and it is so lonely. We are in the process of getting a companion and I look forward to that. I am still functioning pretty well. I have good days, bad days, happy days and sad days. My husband takes good care of me right now and is my best and only friend. so I hoped joining a support group would ease the loneliness. Listening to others and knowing your not alone. Thank you for listening to my story and I look forward to support and hearing you.
Smilesyourway
Posted: Saturday, February 16, 2019 2:58 PM
Joined: 1/11/2019
Posts: 70


Welcome, welcome.  Your story is my story and many others you will find out.  I was diagnosed 18 months ago.  The hardest 18 months of my life, losing relationships, going through the depression and anxiety as well as fear or your own mortality.  We understand.  I spent most of those months researching, getting meds adjusted and getting my paperwork in order for my family.  I had to stop working 6 months ago which in all honestly helped greatly.  The stress of work was instantly gone. 

Yes every day is a new day.  Will it be good will it be a bad day.  My husband is my rock currently too.  I'm sorry you are having to go through this too.  Hugs and peace.  Share or ask any questions that come to mind.  There are many out here that have answers or have experienced the same things. 

Hugs,

Smiles

 


Mleast
Posted: Saturday, February 16, 2019 3:54 PM
Joined: 2/9/2019
Posts: 4


Thank you so much! We are very similar and it is a comfort to me that I am not alone after all. Hugs and peace to you as well.
Iris L.
Posted: Saturday, February 16, 2019 3:59 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 16187


Welcome Mleast.  As Smiles says, being abandoned by friends is common.  I was abandoned by my closest friends when I talked about my memory loss.  Nowadays, with other friends and with new friends and other people that I meet, I don't mention memory loss.  

 

If anything comes up, I blame it on systemic lupus.  Other PWDs (persons with dementia) have had a different experience in disclosing their dementia.  I think disclosing should be on a "need to know" basis.

 

I also relieved a lot of loneliness by posting on these boards and visiting the chat rooms.  I attend local senior groups and local support groups.  I attend a Memory Club.  Socialization is important, and we have to find new ways of socializing.

 

Iriis L.


Mimi S.
Posted: Sunday, February 17, 2019 12:35 PM
Joined: 11/29/2011
Posts: 7035


Welcome to our world Mleast. I'm so glad you found our site.

Being diagnosed before age 65 is not common and so locally it is usuall difficult to find a soul mate. That is the beauty of this site.

You might want to get in touch with your local Alz. Assoc. (Call our help line 1-800-272-3900. ) Call during normal business hours. The office is apt to be closed this Monday because of Presidents Day Holiday.

Do ask about the DC Spring Forum. It's a great place to meet others in Early Stage and many of them will be Younger Onset. Also, getting involved with your local Assoc can be good for you and the local.


Dave4Now
Posted: Thursday, February 21, 2019 4:35 AM
Joined: 11/21/2018
Posts: 5


The good thing is you recognize you need help and you came here to find it. Being Proactive to keep yourself going is important. 

I got 'officially' diagnosed in August, but we knew something wasn't going right for about 2 years prior. So my official Diagnosis was at 49 but I was aware of the problems and looking for help since I was 47. 

My friends haven't abandoned me, but they just can't comprehend it. 

The surprise for me is how poorly my family has been at being supportive. They don't want to acknowledge it. They don't ask how I'm doing, they don't ask how I'm feeling. It's so awkward when my parents don't say anything about what I am dealing with, and then when I visit them their neighbors ask me how I'm feeling. My parents lost a child 40+ years ago, and clearly they aren't able to deal with the thought of losing (mentally) another one. 

My wife is as supportive as can be. But I can already see that my mood swings are overwhelming her. 

But finding others that understand, sympathize... and hopefully show you that they are worse off and you ain't doing so bad (LOL --- read that as dark sense of humor) is what helps us get thru today to see what tomorrow holds. 


Smilesyourway
Posted: Thursday, February 21, 2019 1:41 PM
Joined: 1/11/2019
Posts: 70


Hey Dave, welcome welcome. I know exactly what you are saying when you say your LO's don't ask or acknowledge the disease.  I went through the same thing and it was difficult because being newly diagnosed can be the time you struggle most.  It's the official time.....it's the grieving time, the depression, My family wasn't saying anything.  I finally talked with my psychologist and we decided to have a famiy meet.  A meet that with her as facilitator I could say how I felt and what I needed.  They were able to ask questions and share as well.  It was a huge success and happened right at my dining table where we were all comfortable (after she left we ran for a beer and wine).  I learned that they too were going through the entire grieving process as well.  Maybe something like that would help you as well.  Losing one child and the possibility of another has to be overwhelming for your parents.  I am 59 and have White Matter Disease of the brain, hence vascular dementia.  Stress is HUGE...........it has to go.  Stress causes anxiety, anxiety can cause depression and walla your symptoms have worsened.  We look forward to sharing out here. 

Hey very cool about your Mensa status. 

Smiles


Mleast
Posted: Thursday, February 21, 2019 3:18 PM
Joined: 2/9/2019
Posts: 4


Thank you, I appreciate the imput. Yes we do have to seek out socializing.
Mleast
Posted: Thursday, February 21, 2019 3:21 PM
Joined: 2/9/2019
Posts: 4


Thank you. My mom denies it. My brother died at 52 and she won't accept another loss. My husband as well is my rock, He has put up with every fit, tear and frustration. Take care of yourself.