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another night in hell...
Posted: Monday, January 20, 2020 9:38 PM
Joined: 4/23/2019
Posts: 406

I hate evenings. I can't keep DH asleep for the night.  He gets up agitated and paces up and down the stairs and in and out of the bedroom.  He talks to me the whole time, telling me I am lazy for being in bed, etc.  Last night he carried around the big flashlight looking under the bed, in the hampers, under the dressers, etc.  He would stand at the bottom of the stairs and turn the light on and then off and on and off etc.  I finally got up and shut the bedroom door so I could hopefully get some sleep.  Didn't take long before he kept opening the bedroom door and sticking his head in, then finally just opened it all the way and turned the bedroom lights on.  Tonight I asked if he wanted to go to bed and he said yes, so upstairs we went.  I helped him take his shoes off and he then put them right back on.  I gave up and came downstairs and of course he followed me.  He tells me he wants to go home.  I tell him he is home.  The melatonin isn't helping to keep him asleep.  It wouldn't be so bad if he wouldn't be so darn mean.  

Anyone have any tips or tricks to get your loved ones to sleep and stay asleep?

Posted: Monday, January 20, 2020 10:07 PM
Joined: 10/31/2019
Posts: 92

hi jdmg1,

i just logged on to see if i could find answers for exactly what youre going through. i hate nights too. we saw the doctor last week, and she gave us some seroquel, but it doesnt help. he's up just as much, but unsteady on his feet. he complained how lousy he felt the next day. so i halved the dose.... just not sure. i think it makes things worse. he tells me, "i'm not going to that place again. it's not working for me and i'm not going back", talking about his bedroom.  i'm so tired. i help him to the bathroom all through the night. i'm wasted the next day.

does your husband take any kind of sleeping aid?' does he sleep during the day?

i am sorry you're going through this, i know how hard it is.

Posted: Monday, January 20, 2020 10:16 PM
Joined: 4/23/2019
Posts: 406

I am so sorry you are experiencing the same issue.  My DH has always said he has a high tolerance when it comes to drugs.  Boy, I sure believe him.  I have given him 10 mg's, but he wet the bed when I did that.  The 5 mg get him to sleep, but won't keep him there.  He fights everything I try to do for him.  Tonight I left him where he was in the living room and told him I was headed to bed.  I have been sick for going on three weeks without much improvement, because I cannot get a goon nights rest.  I do believe I am going to leave my son to deal with DH this weekend and take a room at the Hampton Inn for a solid nights sleep. lol
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 12:34 AM
Joined: 1/11/2020
Posts: 192

My DH was given Melatonin while he was recently in the hospital.  They took him off of the Melatonin and other "sedating" meds and he staid awake the next day.

I tried Melatonin 2 nights.  He didn't stay asleep and slept even more the next day.  I didn't give it to him last night, and he's asleep right now.  Maybe the Melatonin has "trained" his body when to sleep - here's hoping.

Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 2:43 AM
Joined: 5/7/2018
Posts: 437

My DH's neurologist prescribed trazadone for sleep. He took two pills a night (50mg each). I also bought a CBD oil at a dispensary that was made for sleep. Trazadone is not addicting and is prescribed for insomnia. It worked really well for my DH. He rarely got up during the night. I didn't always give him the CBD oil, but I always gave him the trazadone. You might ask your doctor for it. It's worth a try. It sure helped my DH with sleep.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 4:58 AM
Joined: 4/2/2018
Posts: 3265

If I'm not mistaken, there were posts about people using weighted blankets, and I think they helped with sleep. I could be wrong, but do a search for it. I think Jamie might have been one who used it, but again could be wrong. Could be another option.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 7:05 AM
Joined: 1/11/2020
Posts: 192

I think I'll try to get trazadone for my DH - but if it makes him sleep during the day, it won't be a success.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 7:29 AM
Joined: 1/11/2020
Posts: 192

I just did Google searches:  

trazadone - not comfortable with

weighted blanket - sounds good

Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 7:30 AM
Joined: 6/3/2019
Posts: 5

My husband takes 50mg of trazadone each night. It works great. Prior to that, we were in the same situation. He was getting up in the middle of the night and shaving or getting dressed. Trazadone is not addictive and it wears off. He is able to get up during the night to use the bathroom and he goes right back to sleep. He is not sleeping during the day. I suggest you ask your physician about it.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 7:42 AM
Joined: 9/5/2017
Posts: 653

My husband takes 50 mg Trazodone as well as 100 mg Seroquel.  He's been on Seroquel for over 3 years, started out with the low dosage.  Trazodone was started a couple of months ago and has helped tremendously.
Rescue mom
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 8:12 AM
Joined: 10/12/2018
Posts: 1593

Talk to your doctor, quick. There are many Rx drugs that will help him, and therefore you, sleep. You tried melatonin, good for you, but it does not always work for everybody.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 9:07 AM
Joined: 7/24/2017
Posts: 8

Another vote for Trazadone.  My DH takes 50mg at bedtime and 100mg of Zoloff.  Sleeps from around 10pm to 8am most nights.  Usually up only once or twice for a bathroom run.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 9:13 AM
Joined: 4/23/2019
Posts: 406

Okay, the status thus far:  DH never took melatonin for more than 4 days.  Does not work for him.  I called the doc and they sent in a script for trazadone.  I pray on everything holy that this works.  Last night he was up all night turning on and off lights (not sure why the fascination with light switches) and keeping not only me awake but also our 23 year old son who is a welder.  This insanity has got to come to an end.

I am trying to get an appointment with a neuropsychiatrist.  

I am also wanting to get in touch with some type of social worker who can hopefully help.  

I will invest in a weighted blanket, but don't hold out much hope with that.  Just because DH fights through everything.  His tenacity served him well all his life, but at this point in time it is wrecking havoc for me and my son.  

Wish us luck

Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 9:19 AM
Joined: 12/27/2017
Posts: 321

When my DH was in stage 6, he, too, was getting up in the night 5+ times and pacing through the house. He started on 25 mg. Seroquel.  For him, it was a magic pill.  I gave it to him an hour before he went to bed and voila.  Except for getting up to go to the bathroom, he pretty much slept through the night.  DH is now in stage 7 and takes 37 mg. of Seroquel.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 10:26 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 18849

I do wish you luck. I see no way that one person can take care of another with no sleep.

Melatonin did not work for me neither did Valerian. Sometimes Magnesium helps.

Trazadone seems to be the go to for persons with AD. 

Please keep us in the loop...

Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 11:07 AM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 12034


 Charles took Trazadone at night for years and really never had a problem sleeping.  It's certainly worth a try.

Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 11:11 AM
Joined: 6/20/2016
Posts: 2394

The two top things that precipitate placement are incontinence and the lack of sleep for the caregiver.

"Natural" remedies won't even touch this.

Try the sedative medications.  If those don't work, you may want to look into getting on some waiting lists for facilities.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 11:18 AM
Joined: 5/7/2018
Posts: 437

Ed, I was the one who posted about weighted blankets. They are for anxiety and help you sleep. I stopped using mine because it made me too hot. I am someone who needs to be almost cold to go to sleep.


Trazadone never made my husband sleepy during the day.

Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 11:21 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 18849

I agree with is the time to get your Plan B in place. You may never turn to it but you will be prepared.
Eric L
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 3:06 PM
Joined: 12/5/2014
Posts: 1290

We didn't have to resort to sleep aids that often with MIL. Usually, once she was out, she was out. Towards the end, hospice did give a prescription for trazadone (I think) to use as needed.

One thing I will say.. if it makes someone sleep through the night, does it really matter if they also sleep more during the day? Essentially, the drug is prescribed really to aid the caregiver. The number one concern in this matter should be if it works and keeps them asleep at night so you can sleep at night.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 8:08 PM
Joined: 12/26/2018
Posts: 34

What I did on those days was,,,,when he slept day or night i attempted to sleep.  We used lorazapram  haldol and finally morphine to try to calm him down and sleep. We did that the last 2 nights until he passed this morning at 3:45am. 



Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 8:16 PM
Joined: 3/26/2018
Posts: 106

Oh Julie, I’m so sorry for your loss.  May he rest peacefully in the arms of angels.  Hugs to you.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 9:57 PM
Joined: 6/3/2016
Posts: 91

Hi jdmg,

I have the same problem as you do. My DH won’t go to bed before midnight & since he can’t get undressed or use the bathroom by himself I have to stay up too. He takes 50mg Trazodone every night & it does no good. He starts talking in his sleep about 3am & then gets up at 3:30, walks all over the house, turns lights on & off, is argumentative & combative . Last night I was at my wit’s end so instead of Trazodone, I gave him some ZZQuil. It’s over the counter it worked like a charm. Don’t know if I should have done that but he slept like a baby until 9 this morning & got up in a great mood & had a good day.

Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 10:17 PM
Joined: 4/23/2019
Posts: 406

As of right now DH has been sleeping deeply since about 7:30.  But, he was up all last night pacing and fighting off the three men that came through the windows and tied his legs up with a was such a long night.  I am going to go to sleep while I can.  I have been fooled before about thinking he will sleep through the night.  I will post tomorrow on how we fared.  Thank you everyone.
Posted: Tuesday, January 21, 2020 10:40 PM
Joined: 10/4/2019
Posts: 46

Ivcarlvr. My DH was also put on Trazadone recently. Started with 50mg at bedtime-did nothing. Went to 100mg-still no help. Went to 150mg and he has slept from to 10:00pm to 6:00am three nights in a row. Hopefully, this is our ticket to rest. He was uncontrollable at night before.
Posted: Wednesday, January 22, 2020 7:48 AM
Joined: 1/11/2020
Posts: 192

Thank you for the responses - Last night Bob slept - is this a cycle?

Also, I noticed yesterday, he sleeps or speaks unintelligibly til about 10 am then he's awake til about 4:30 pm then goes to bed about 8 pm  OR maybe it was just yesterday because I gave him a breating treatment via nebulizer - I'll do that today.

I checked the versions of Memantine - it IS available in an oral suspension, so I will talk to the provider and see if I can get it changed.

Posted: Wednesday, January 22, 2020 11:08 AM
Joined: 1/11/2020
Posts: 192

at 10 am his BP was 90/60  was getting ready to take him to PCP as walk-in, but 10:20am 100/54   10:33am 98/52  10:42am  140/78  11:21am  132/98   has appt with PCP tomorrow, so will mention sleep patterns then.

Posted: Wednesday, January 22, 2020 11:15 AM
Joined: 4/23/2019
Posts: 406

The trazadone seemed to have worked.  Although, tonight will be the real test.  After all last night he was going on 24 hours of no sleep.  He got up a couple of times to go to the bathroom and came right back to bed and went back to sleep.  We got up at 7.  I made us coffee and breakfast and then I went back to bed until almost 11.  I am still recovering from the creeping crud.  We are both is much better moods today!  I called city hall and left a message with the person handling retirement paperwork.  It is time to get DH retired.  It would have been initiated much sooner if I wasn't so darn sick.  

I spoke with the pharmacist about trazadone, and he said it is an old drug that is very reliable.  It can also be taken at 400mg's.  Lord, I pray we never reach that level.  But, he did well on the 25 mg.  

Posted: Wednesday, January 22, 2020 11:42 AM
Joined: 4/2/2018
Posts: 3265

I'm glad you seem to have found something that actually works! Great!!
Posted: Friday, January 24, 2020 4:03 AM
Joined: 1/11/2020
Posts: 192

I mentioned sleep patterns to PCP; she requested that I ask Geriatrics manage that.  I sent message to Geriatrics; responded to try Melatonin.  I gave 5 mg Melatonin about 8 pm.  Bob fell asleep (peacefully) in recliner, awoke about 1 hr later.  I tried for about 1 hr to get him to go to bed; finally went to bed.  At 12:20 got up to go potty (had to use urinal).  Back to bed at 1:30;  up again at 2:34 finally went to bed and sleep at 3:30 - now I can't sleep.

Well I did get a good bike ride today.  AND Mom is going to send me for a massage, and she'll stay with Bob while I go (a birthday gift).

Posted: Friday, January 24, 2020 7:10 AM
Joined: 3/15/2018
Posts: 616

Hurrah! I’m so glad it worked! Another passage taken.