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Living the good life.(1)
Jim Broede
Posted: Saturday, December 8, 2018 10:49 PM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 5462


How do I get through old age? Without being preoccupied. With dying. Yes, I know. It’s better being focused on living. And not be focused on the possibility of dropping dead. At any given moment. That used to be easy. When I was younger. In my 50s and  60s. I was still able to rationalize. ‘Oh, well, I probably have 20 or 30 years left. No need to worry. I’ll be okay.’  But now I know. That statistically. Lots of people don’t make it out of their 80s. Alive, that is. Don’t know many 90-year-olds. They are relatively few and far between. And I’m not so certain that I want to be 90. If I’m a little too decrepit. Anyway, I’m occasionally haunted by the feeling of running out of time. Like to shove that thought aside. By taking life. One day at a time.  Not getting too far ahead. By fretting about the future. But in my low moments. Late at night. When I’m tired. I do. Suppose that goes for other octogenarians. As they fumble through remaining life. Maybe I should be more thankful. That I’m creeping, relatively unscathed, into the waning years of old age. Still active. Mentally and physically and emotionally. With plans to go live with my Italian amore. In Sardinia. Later this winter. Hopefully, I’ll still be around for a few more winters. Living the good life. --Jim


jfkoc
Posted: Sunday, December 9, 2018 8:59 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 19075


Your posts have reflected your concern with dying for some time.

Death. Interesting topic and one that I now think of now too.

I never thought of it until some time after my husband died. Is that because  I am older? Is it because it was suggested that since I have not been able to "place" my husband's ashes that I consider where I want to land since I do want us to be together.

My thoughts seem to be particularly strong when I get into bed Sunday nights and realize that another week is gone. 

I do not feel that I am wasting time since I pretty much pass the week doing what I want but..

I hope others will share some of their thoughts about death. Not afterlife but death.


ruthmendez
Posted: Sunday, December 9, 2018 2:07 PM
Joined: 9/8/2017
Posts: 2315


jfkoc wrote:

...

I hope others will share some of their thoughts about death. Not afterlife but death.

The truth.  For a while I was thinking, hopefully nothing happens to me while dad is still around.  Lately, I don't really care anymore, as long as it's not an instant death.  Prefer some preplanning time.  I'm not depressed or anything, I just think I'm ok with passing on.  I don't have anyone to worry about leaving behind other than dad.

I've known quite a few people who have died young of cancer, despite treatments and all.  The last person almost made it to 50, after a year of treatments.  The cancer still spread.  

I wonder, would I want to go through chemo? Or just let go?  I kinda don't want to go through the works and just focus on passing on my responsibilities or work.

Also, I don't want to make it to 90. 

 

 


Jim Broede
Posted: Saturday, December 15, 2018 11:40 PM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 5462


jfkoc wrote:

Your posts have reflected your concern with dying for some time.

Death. Interesting topic and one that I now think of now too.

I never thought of it until some time after my husband died. Is that because  I am older? Is it because it was suggested that since I have not been able to "place" my husband's ashes that I consider where I want to land since I do want us to be together.

My thoughts seem to be particularly strong when I get into bed Sunday nights and realize that another week is gone. 

I do not feel that I am wasting time since I pretty much pass the week doing what I want but..

I hope others will share some of their thoughts about death. Not afterlife but death.


Have you thought about mixing your ashes with your husband's ashes? Placing them in a beautiful urn. So that you can be buried. Together. Forever. I may do the same. Mix my ashes with Jeanne's ashes. Seems like the romantic thing to do. I keep Jeanne's ashes right here. With me. Better that. Than scattering them. --Jim


jfkoc
Posted: Monday, December 17, 2018 9:11 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 19075


No, never thought to mix ashes but we will be buried together. Most likely Arlington