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New Here...just wanted to share my story
Posted: Monday, December 10, 2012 1:23 AM
Joined: 12/10/2012
Posts: 1

I hope Im in the right place if not point me to it please. I lost my grandmother in 2007 to Alzheimer. She was my life. My grandmother was the one that raised me, so I took this pretty bad. For a couple of years, I thoughht this was my fault. Now I know its not and nothing I could do will change it. But it still hurts everyday. I just want something to vent myself to and have feedback. I miss my granny more than words can describe. I have a memorial tattoo for her. So thats my story.

Posted: Monday, December 10, 2012 11:57 AM
Joined: 3/11/2012
Posts: 433

Hi aliciakaye,


Welcome! Yes, you are in exactly the right place. Thank you for sharing your story. It sounds like you miss your grandmother terribly. You must have had a very special relationship with her.


I lost my precious, beautiful mother to this dreadful disease in June of this year. I had the best mother/daughter relationship in the world with her! I was her only daughter and the baby of the family so we had a very close relationship. My brothers always said I was spoiled and now that I am older, I guess I have to agree. It's funny how you don't see something so obvious that everyone else can see! I miss her SO much - more and more every day.


Thank you again for sharing your story. Please continue to come and share with us. I have found this board to be very comforting and the people on here to be very caring.



Posted: Monday, December 10, 2012 2:29 PM
Joined: 12/2/2011
Posts: 726

Thank you for sharing your story with us.  Your grandmother must have been a wonderful woman to have been so loved.


I lost both of my parents in the past several months.  I miss them terribly.  I am beginning to wonder if this feeling will ever go away. I hope that it fades to a dull ache and then to happy memories.  I am sure that it is different for everyone.


I am glad that you forgive yourself for anything that happened along your grandmother's long journey.  AD is a horrible disease.  It causes so much stress and disruption for such a long time.  Remember that whatever happened in your situation was because of the disease and nothing that you did or didn't do would have prevented that.


Your grandmother would want you to enjoy your life.  If you feel that you are not able to move on and enjoy your life, then please reach out for help.  You can call the Alzheimer's Assoc. 24/7 Helpline at 800-272-3900.  They can help you find support in your area.  For now, welcome and I am glad you found us.

Posted: Monday, December 10, 2012 3:30 PM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 3097

Yep, you belong here with us.  I've thought about getting a tattoo in memory of my mom, but I haven't figured out how I want it to look yet. 


This disease is brutal on everybody, and even the end can be peaceful but we are left wondering of our LO understood everything we were saying to them or if they had something to say to us and couldn't because they were past being able to talk?  I'm pretty sure my mom understood me...well, that's what I'm going to believe.


Keep coming back to this club nobody wants to join.  Doesn't matter when your LO died, it hurts forever, I think.

dj okay
Posted: Monday, December 10, 2012 7:49 PM
Joined: 11/29/2011
Posts: 1840

Welcome, Alicia!


I think that losing the one that raised you is one of the hardest things we face in this life.  Losing them to dementia is even harder.  At least it seemed that way to me.  I lost my sweet mother in August this year and I still miss her every day.


You have found a good place to vent and work through your grief and sorrow.  It seems sort of sad to say welcome to such a group, but you are in good company.

Be gentle with yourself.  Everyone grieves at a different speed.  It just is...what it is.