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can I rant?
a_step@a_time
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 2:10 AM
Joined: 11/21/2015
Posts: 237


Delete this if annoying a Lil off topic subject.  Been while since I been online.  Ohhh dear, our banks here are charging fees for bulk paper statement mailers.  This means for me and other aging people around me, if do online banking only is more risk of forgetting login and password and such.  Then to write down, a risk to be taken advantage of for brain ill type person.  Is there no one lobbying for ill people on this topic?????   Ohhh so stressful and monies already depleted by life needs.  I hate being ill and no support system.
The_Sun_Still_Rises
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 5:12 AM
Joined: 7/24/2015
Posts: 3020


You don't have log in you bank online...you can simply call over the phone and get your information.  My mom was a bit skeptical this, but I had encourage her and do for her a number of times before she understood how do this.  But I explained that waiting for your statement is old, because you will have done transactions since then...and that this is the only way get up date information.  Now she likes it, and she can simply call whenever the urge strikes her try balance her checkbook. 

<3


a_step@a_time
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 8:14 AM
Joined: 11/21/2015
Posts: 237


 Sorry for repeat post my system message said 'time out', 'try again'.

  So is call all automated?

Can bank clerk print anything to balance statement?  I won't remember what was completed and running balance.  In fact I probably would forget to call in. Sounds stressful. More stuff to remember to get done. .... Out of sight, out of mind.  Then I would forget when to transfer monies into the account to pay bills.  Argh


a_step@a_time
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 8:41 AM
Joined: 11/21/2015
Posts: 237


Even if bank offered option to get statement quarterly or biannually would be helpful for non busy banking.  Credit union would be smart to offer options.
alz+
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 9:00 AM
Joined: 9/12/2013
Posts: 3608


IF IT IS A LARGE BANK can you call customer service?

I do not like using phones and I understand what you are saying. I still have saved passwords and id so it is one click to get on - BUT then they changed the online format to something I will never get used to. Finding my way around the new format takes me so much time I stopped checking in.

we also use a small local bank and they know everyone who banks there and would gladly send me paper if I asked.

I spoke to several national company customer service people when I was first diagnosed and suggested they instruct the CS folks in how to handle a call from people with lower abilities. Explained there are millions of us so they should be prepared. They seemed receptive but - that is what they are trained to do, appear receptive.

Also wonder about telling anyone in finances "I have Alzheimer's" ...
I am much less trusting the more my dementia advances.

The other aspect I see is that you would be much less stressed if you have someone you trust handle your finances. I can still pay bills online but my son is now doing everything else (I am not wealthy with massive amounts of paperwork but what there is he handles easily).

If I want a paper statement of what he is doing he mails it to me.

Maybe other people will say how they got rid of the responsibility?
when people are living alone - who do they trust? 

In importance with driving a car, financial relief from responsibility is something to think about.  You will feel much  more relaxed when you find someone to even print the statements out for you, but do you think it would help you to have someone else in charge of bills and deposits etc?

How are you doing otherwise?

(great topic - can't recall anyone else bringing this up)


julielarson
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 9:37 AM
Joined: 9/30/2015
Posts: 1155


Welcome back a_step_@ atime. you have been missed.
The_Sun_Still_Rises
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 10:22 AM
Joined: 7/24/2015
Posts: 3020


a_step@a_time wrote:

 Sorry for repeat post my system message said 'time out', 'try again'.

  So is call all automated?

Can bank clerk print anything to balance statement?  I won't remember what was completed and running balance.  In fact I probably would forget to call in. Sounds stressful. More stuff to remember to get done. .... Out of sight, out of mind.  Then I would forget when to transfer monies into the account to pay bills.  Argh

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Np the posts, this place glitches all the time....perils of so many being online at once. 

The calls ARE all automated, unless you click for speak someone.  With ours, you tell them what you want - you balance, and you either type or say your number, then you type or say you password....and then they tell you balance.  Then you can get you recent activity, with even pending things....so you can know which of your transactions have gone through. 

I LOVE it....my daughter and I use all time before go store,  just for MAKE SURE.  

And YES, when you go inside bank you can get a print out you recent activity.  It not quite as cool as the one they send you. 

We have a bank with FREE accounts, no minimum balance, but the side effect is no paper.  I refuse do online banking....as I was a bit of a geek in Silicon Valley when the internet was just getting in that, and there just no way make it safe. 

Hope that helps.

<3



Jo C.
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 11:30 AM
Joined: 12/9/2011
Posts: 12157


Hello step, I understand your wanting to have monthly bank statements on paper; you are not the only person who feels this way; many people continue to want that and some like being able to easily look backward and forward at their banking history and do not want to or cannot do that online.

Having the bank charge for such statements is unfortunate; however, if you contact your bank manager and explain your situation with Alzhiemer's and your inability to use the computer; and that you cannot afford to pay for your statements, they more than likely have the ability to waive the charge for the statements.  Your bank manager should be able to do this for you.

Of course there is the 800 number for Customer Service but that entails a wait on hold as well as perhaps having to go from the rep to a supervisor who would be the decision maker.  You can always choose to make this contact if you need to or wish to.

Hang in there, just one more time we have to step up and advocate for ourselves.  If at first you do not get the result you want, make a contact to the department/person you have not yet spoken to.  Also, if you wish, you can also request for an "alert" to be placed on your account where you will be contacted if someone tries to access it who is not authorized or if there is unusual activity.  That can be helpful in preventing fraud or theft. 

Best wishes for getting those fees waived,

J.


Iris L.
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 3:26 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 17580


Welcome back, step.  I receive bank statements but I don't even read them.  I check my balances on the telephone.  What I have done is to try to get all my bills paid for the beginning of each month, so I don't have to worry about balances.  I know how much checks are written, so I can make sure that that amount is in the checking account.  


One thing that helped me a LOT with bills is to have automatic debit for my utility bills and insurance bill.  My mortgage recently was paid in full in December 2006, so I don't have to write out a mortgage check.  I still pay my HOA dues.


I have a system where I place my incoming invoices in a notebook with a pocket for each month.  For example, all my March invoices are in pocket, so this coming Friday, I will write out the checks and have them in the mail ready for receipt by the first of March.  Usually I do this at the beginning of the week, but since February is a short month, I will prepare on the preceeding Friday.  The main point is to gather invoices when they come in the mail, and place them in ONE PLACE so I will be able to find them at bill-paying time.  I also keep a supply of stamps ready.


I try to limit bill paying for one or two days a month.  Years ago, I called all my bills and told them to make the due dates for at least two weeks after the first of the month, because my check comes in on the first.


I have automatic deposit for my income.  Do you have automatic deposit?


I tried to get a professional geriatric care manager to help me with my bills because I was missing dates.  But she was of no help.


I would suggest that you NOT tell anyone at the bank that you have a cognitive or memory problem.  Even if you know someone personally, and get to trust him or her, the banks rotate their employees all the time, so your trusted person will eventually move to another branch.


I am like you in not having a care partner.  I have to do everything myself.  I have found that professionals who promote themselves as being there to help seniors are basically clueless about what needs to be done and how to do it.  That is why I am making my own plans.  


I had posted a thread earlier about solos who are taking the cognitive impairment or dementia journey alone.  A few responded who are not truly solo, because they do have someone who will take over in a pinch.


I hope you will continue to post.  Sometimes there is a glitch.  I copy all of my longer posts before I click "Post" because I have had them disappear, and I couldn't remember all that I had written.  But in overall, receiving constructive support from members will help you, as it has helped me in the far past.  


Iris L.


a_step@a_time
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 10:03 PM
Joined: 11/21/2015
Posts: 237


 Thanks for all the feedback and concern.  I will try and call for more info.  Maybe if my account has a set amount the fee can get waived.  Better to at least try. Phone calls so much to remember.  Automatic deposit does help.

  I am missing my deceased family members.  Not having a significant other takes a toll too. Trying to stay out of depression.  At least some brain decline seems to have slowed down. Or maybe just different as it is more challenging to read and focus.  It has helped me to adhere to rosacea food sensitivities.  My new issue seems to be anxiety with life changing so quickly for my slow brain.  That in turn impacts my need to focus and concentrate on anything and everything. It helps when I avoid sick people.  As each flu and cold take a hit on my immune system.  However my vision is affected by steroids (estrogen hormone therapy). I do miss everyone on here and love to read your progress. Thank you again!


a_step@a_time
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 10:21 PM
Joined: 11/21/2015
Posts: 237


Oh iris I see you paid your mortgage off. I sooo jealous. Money too tight for me to own right now.  Stress of home ownership can be much.  Found out my rent going up again this year. Grrrr

..  I like idea of calling to make bills due same time so sit at once to pay them.  I try to avoid telling bank of dementia but they can tell something not right with me.   Strange others think I'm normal but in denial. They just think I'm stupid when reality is that I have college degree. I hate those kind of assuming people!


Iris L.
Posted: Monday, February 20, 2017 10:32 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 17580


Step, the FIRST advice I was given years ago when I was diagnosed as having systemic lupus was "ACCOMMODATE YOUR ILLNESS!"  This is so important, for all of us.  We need to do whatever it takes to make our lives easier.  Accommodating doesn't mean giving up, it means making our lives better.  I used to read TONS of material--now I can't.  I still read, but I must choose and prioritize what I read.  Everything I do is harder for me, but I just figure out how to do it easier, and then do it.  I don't know if you are like me, but I don't have a cadre of tax-payer funded workers to do anything for me.  I DO EVERYTHING FOR MYSELF, BY MYSELF!  

For years, I was riddled with anxiety.  Alan in Colorado, one of our emeritus members, who was himself a psychologist, would warn us that anxiety and stress reduce our cognition by HALF!  That was a wake-up call for me.  I realized that I had to reduce my anxiety, which at that time was with me 24/7!  I was given a simple but effective technique by a LCSW therapist.  She told me about deep breathing.  It sounds simple, but I used it every time I felt anxious, which was often.  After a while, the anxious feelings reduced.  I still use this technique.  


Using deep breathing is an immediate technique, and it allowed me to be able to use other techniques that may take longer to take effect, such as visualization, exercise, journaling and listening to music.  There are many techniques that you can use.  You can learn some from books, from the internet, or from a qualified therapist.  The important thing is, to find an anxiety-reducing technique that works for YOU.  


Also use other modalities to reduce stress, which means basically reducing your workload, reducing the tasks that you are responsible for.  If your finances are stressful, figure out how to simplify them.  Otherwise, you will continue to be stressed, because our culture today constantly invents new ways to make life more complicated.  I already know that I can't keep up.  That's why I enrolled in Senior Computer Class, so I can attempt to keep up with the modern world.  No one is looking out for us, Step, we have to do for ourselves.


I had a friend with chronic pulmonary disease who would not leave her home in the winter, in order to avoid colds and flu.  I have learned to do the same.  I do leave my home, but I take precautions to avoid colds and flu.  


You say your vision is affected by steriods, but it could also be affected by dementia.  Visual agnosia is a symptom of dementia.  An opthalmologist may be able to tell you if your vision problem is due to eye disease that affects older adults, such as glaucoma, macular degeneration or cataracts, or neurological disease, such as visual agnosia or a complication of diabetes or hypertension.  There are so many possibilities to be checked out.


The good thing is, usually nothing happens too quickly.  So we have time to look into what needs to be done, and then to do it.  Take time to decompress, do your stress-relief, and refresh yourself.  Make your life easier.  And look for support from your cyber-family here.

             {{{{{{{{ Step }}}}}}}}


Iris L.




    


The_Sun_Still_Rises
Posted: Tuesday, February 21, 2017 6:27 AM
Joined: 7/24/2015
Posts: 3020


a_step@a_time wrote:

 Thanks for all the feedback and concern.  I will try and call for more info.  Maybe if my account has a set amount the fee can get waived.  Better to at least try. Phone calls so much to remember.  Automatic deposit does help.

  I am missing my deceased family members.  Not having a significant other takes a toll too. Trying to stay out of depression.  At least some brain decline seems to have slowed down. Or maybe just different as it is more challenging to read and focus.  It has helped me to adhere to rosacea food sensitivities.  My new issue seems to be anxiety with life changing so quickly for my slow brain.  That in turn impacts my need to focus and concentrate on anything and everything. It helps when I avoid sick people.  As each flu and cold take a hit on my immune system.  However my vision is affected by steroids (estrogen hormone therapy). I do miss everyone on here and love to read your progress. Thank you again!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Omgoodness, YES, getting a cold sure does increase dementia symptoms!  And I hear you on not having a significant other, or even others, that can help you....same boat here.  It amounts for a LOT of extra stress when you have dementia and your brain is struggling do the things you need be doing...and literally EVERYTHING you do is work, hard work.  I have people around me, but they not helpful....so I am still have do EVERYTHING on my own.  I have auto-immune issues as well, we just tacked on a new one with my new tests, and so I am in process of making huge dietary changes.  My vision is also affected by my auto-immune, double vision, but I have glasses that have prisms in them correct it which helps.

You point out a very important aspect that impacts people with dementia, that just as we get coping skills deal with life, life keeps on changing...it nearly impossible for us keep up. 

I made a simple budget plan over a year ago and it walks me through each month what do, so I can stay pay my bills.  My disability is auto-deposited, so on the 3rd of month my phone reminds me call bank and check see that that happened.  Then I call the electric company, gas company, an cable company and pay those bills - all automated phone calls.  2 bills then come through later (house/car insurance, and cell phones)....so on the 10th month my phone again cues me call bank and check my balance make sure all this has happened and that I am still positive....whatever remains, I go the ATM drive thru and take out - and that my spending money for the month.  There never much, but that my food budget. 

That it the same each month...that I follow the exact same routine, helps.  I printed it out on a sheet and laminated it and hung it up. 

I have weekly sheets of tasks that have happen in the house, like changing air filter and lint traps, mowing and watering.

I have notebooks that walk me step by step through my morning and evening routines (complete with poems I read myself, help keep me going).  I have a notebook for my mom's routines, so that I don't forget what her lunch is. I have step by step for washing my hair. 

And I have OT Cue Cards, Picture Step By Step cards for things like brush my teeth or wipe butt, and for getting dressed.

For me, it helps have everything down in laminated lists and cards...less for me have keep in my head.  As long as I follow the instructions I wrote down, the house will click along as it supposed do.  Which in turn takes some stress off me. 

Hope that helps.  Don't forget that you have friends here who care about you.  Many wonderful new members joined as well.

<3