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For the good of everyone.
Jim Broede
Posted: Friday, May 4, 2018 9:35 AM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 5462


 

I wonder. If I talk and write too much. If I’d be better off. Taking an extended vow of silence. That may be doing a favor. For my friends and associates. For strangers, too. Come to think of it. For everyone. Why is it? That I have a need/compulsion to talk and write. Daily. Can’t remember when I last spent a full day. In total and absolute silence. If no one is around, I talk to myself. Or to my cat, Marcello. As a youngster, I tended to be timid. Silence came more easily. But gradually. I became more bold and effusive. I learned to talk. Then to write. And never stopped. I suspect. That I even talk in my sleep. Could be. That I have a motor in my mouth. I have a nickname. Big Mouth. In multiple languages. I flirt with the notion of becoming a monk. Entering a monastery. And taking a vow of silence. Don’t know if I could do it. But it may be worth a try. I suspect. That many of you. Would encourage me. To take such an awesome step. For the good of everyone. --Jim

 


ruthmendez
Posted: Friday, May 4, 2018 10:35 AM
Joined: 9/8/2017
Posts: 2329


I'm not sure that's a good idea....my mom was taught to keep her mouth shut or not talk too much.  My mom was a talker, but because of this training by her aunt (she was raised by her aunt), and because of other bad things in life, she became depressed, angry.  She was not a happy woman.

I wonder what kind of woman she would have been if she did not suffer depression.  It's never good to keep things inside.  It did her damage. Permanent damage.

 


ruthmendez
Posted: Friday, May 4, 2018 10:50 AM
Joined: 9/8/2017
Posts: 2329


Then again, my father's caregiver talks too much....things I don't care about, her marriage, stuff like that....but I did tell her once to shut up.  That was when my father was having his anger bouts... But then again, sometimes I can handle her nonstop talking.  She can be funny sometimes.  She's even beat up her husband once, defending her kids.  She's a strong woman.  She's alright.

 

 


chrisp1653
Posted: Friday, May 4, 2018 11:29 AM
Joined: 1/23/2017
Posts: 1286


I suspect that this is more of a musing than a threat, but just in case, I'll throw in my thought. Don't stop writing. I've read the words of the ones who think that you have usurped this venue, but it just ain't so. If history has shown anything, it has shown that silencing a voice is like sweeping something under the rug. Sure, there have been plenty of times that I haven't agreed with your position on something, but so what ? What rule book says that we all have to agree on everything ? This is a big table here, and if those seated at it start leaving, it won't be long before there will be just an empty room with a big table.

You know, Jim, I never have figured out what benefit anyone gets from a vow of silence.

Chris


Andrew60
Posted: Friday, May 4, 2018 4:52 PM
Joined: 7/17/2017
Posts: 342


Maybe a short break will help stimulate your creative juices. Try reading some new authors or commentators, such as Michelle Malkin, George Will, Mona Charen, Thomas Sowell.

Enjoy!


jfkoc
Posted: Friday, May 4, 2018 5:53 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 19632


A lot of degrading goes on on this forum... more that I am aware of in 10+ years on these  forums. More arguing and negativity too.
Is it really OK if a name is only implied.

 

edited in...No, there was a women a little over a year ago who was particularly nasty to some members, both caregivers and PWD.   She supposedly took her life but seems to be posting on facebook.


Andrew60
Posted: Friday, May 4, 2018 7:22 PM
Joined: 7/17/2017
Posts: 342


JFKOC - The woman you referred to actually was a big help to me in 2016 when I first joined. I liked the fact she did not sugarcoat the disease, and was kind of in your face with her posts. She also was the first one who responded to my very first post. I would be shocked if she was still alive, but stranger things have happened.


Andrew60
Posted: Friday, May 4, 2018 9:45 PM
Joined: 7/17/2017
Posts: 342


Tiger - As I said on my previous post, I really learned from her, and she always took the time to respond with lengthy and informative posts, based on her first hand experiences. I miss her.
MissHer
Posted: Friday, May 4, 2018 10:38 PM
Joined: 11/13/2014
Posts: 2365


I saw her in a news report from Austin last August, so my guess is that she (SUN)is still around.  If you want to see the news report, I'm sure I can find the member who linked it to me. She probably still has it. So jkfoc is right and I for one will defend her.

And she did cause all kinds of trouble for the CG's and some of the PWD's. 


jfkoc
Posted: Saturday, May 5, 2018 9:04 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 19632


She was undoubtedly helpful to some. Her feigned death need not take away from that.
Jim Broede
Posted: Saturday, May 5, 2018 10:08 AM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 5462


chrisp1653 wrote:

I suspect that this is more of a musing than a threat, but just in case, I'll throw in my thought. Don't stop writing. I've read the words of the ones who think that you have usurped this venue, but it just ain't so. If history has shown anything, it has shown that silencing a voice is like sweeping something under the rug. Sure, there have been plenty of times that I haven't agreed with your position on something, but so what ? What rule book says that we all have to agree on everything ? This is a big table here, and if those seated at it start leaving, it won't be long before there will be just an empty room with a big table.

You know, Jim, I never have figured out what benefit anyone gets from a vow of silence.

Chris


Try it, Chrisp. For a day or two or three. Maybe even a week. Might be enlightening. I like to experiment. With all sorts of things. With different approaches to life. Keep an open mind. --Jim


Jim Broede
Posted: Saturday, May 5, 2018 10:44 AM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 5462


My preliminary research  shows that taking a vow of silence has incalculable benefits. Develops will power, helps check tendency towards impulsive speech, encourages the practitioner to observe truth, control anger, and channel emotions. --Jim
Andrew60
Posted: Saturday, May 5, 2018 11:44 AM
Joined: 7/17/2017
Posts: 342


JFKOC - Is it definte she is still alive, or rumors? As much as I liked exchanging posts with her, I know she did cause some stressful issues with others, but for me, always helpful.

I believe your first post in this thread in regards to her was not meant to be mean spirited, as I know you are not that way. Your posts have also been helpful and informative for me!


jfkoc
Posted: Saturday, May 5, 2018 8:07 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 19632


It was not meant to be mean spirited. I did not think anyone would even make the connection.

Her blog continued for a time but some thought her daughter might be writing. Most written after her "death" were removed.

http://www.kaaltv.com/news/horses-mini-horeses-rescue-autism-ranch-/4576414/

This, I believe, is the first time the subject has been broached on any of the boards out of respect for the good things she did.


ruthmendez
Posted: Saturday, May 5, 2018 9:09 PM
Joined: 9/8/2017
Posts: 2329


Since y'all talking about this n all, it got me all intrigued!  I don't know anything about this story, but I have a question....how did it get announced she took her own life....who said it?  Her daughter?  She posted the announcement here or something???

Or did the deceased post it herself?  Joking...but nah, seriously....how was it announced???


Andrew60
Posted: Saturday, May 5, 2018 9:38 PM
Joined: 7/17/2017
Posts: 342


If I remember correctly, it was her daughter who posted about her mothers death. Her daughter was also a frequent poster on this forum.
ruthmendez
Posted: Saturday, May 5, 2018 9:46 PM
Joined: 9/8/2017
Posts: 2329


Thx Andrew.  I was curious about that....it didn't make sense to me...

 


jfkoc
Posted: Sunday, May 6, 2018 10:10 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 19632


You can search around 3/20/17 and see if anything is left. Many posts and threads were self deleted or deleted by the moderator.

I and others saved posts because of the threats and libelous statements that were made.


llee08032
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 8:16 AM
Joined: 5/20/2014
Posts: 4408


I re-posted link and article on YOAD board. People who were harassed and attacked by this woman deserve to know she faked her own death. Who does that? It was a terrible time on the board IMO. I wonder if more persons were driven away than were helped? She allegedly couldn't speak well any more. Obviously she has gotten past that. My gut say's she becomes an expert on different illnesses and causes and then moves on to something else. She's a shrewd sociopath. Fortunately, she has moved on.... and yes we have moved on. 
jfkoc
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 9:12 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 19632


Per request this is her current blog.

https://zenandtheartofautism.wordpress.com/2018/05/05/what-it-looks-like-when-autistics-raise-autistic-children/

What could have been the reason behind all that went on. Very sad in many ways.


MissHer
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 10:29 AM
Joined: 11/13/2014
Posts: 2365


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0FBWVk62a6Q

its her


Andrew60
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 11:13 AM
Joined: 7/17/2017
Posts: 342


Thanks Miss Her.

There is one other on this forum who at times, has caused me to be suspicious as to their authenticity about being a former caretaker. But, its probably just my over imaginative and suspicious self.


MissHer
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 11:25 AM
Joined: 11/13/2014
Posts: 2365


Hmmm.. I haven't sensed that one yet. Why would anyone do that? Of course same thing as Sun/Faith I guess. Must have nothing else to do but go around on boards faking whatever. These people should get a life. (It's not me! I am care taking for my mom! )
ruthmendez
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 11:31 AM
Joined: 9/8/2017
Posts: 2329


Me neither, but I do suspect something a little fishy....but hey, I'm not all there myself...let me tell ya.

 


MissHer
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 11:37 AM
Joined: 11/13/2014
Posts: 2365


Right mind?! Me either, but that's obvious to everyone. So if I tell people that this is driving me crazy they could not tell the difference of the before and after. lol

How do you fix crazy when the therapists and shrinks don't even believe me? They just send me on my way with a clean bill of mental health. (depression) 


ruthmendez
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 1:14 PM
Joined: 9/8/2017
Posts: 2329


watched the video you provided, Deb.  She talks about a very interesting topic...

 Personally, whether she's truthful or not, dead or alive, she has been strongly affected by something.  I assume she's had first hand experience in caregiving for someone, or watched someone suffer and this has profoundly affected her.  She is struggling and is trying to survive or figuring how to live a meaningful life....but it shouldn't be done at the expense of hurting others...

We all get somewhat confused with the meaning of life....at least it does for me.


Jim Broede
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 1:31 PM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 5462


Let's be honest about it. We're all crazy. To a degree. Some more than others. I may be the leader of the crazy pack. I was born crazy. Some of you had to cultivate craziness. --Jim
ruthmendez
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 1:42 PM
Joined: 9/8/2017
Posts: 2329


hahah!  Yep, yep.  I don't mind being called crazy...I laugh at my crazies....(but I don't want to hurt anyone.....)
llee08032
Posted: Tuesday, May 8, 2018 6:38 AM
Joined: 5/20/2014
Posts: 4408


Does she have autism now?
jfkoc
Posted: Tuesday, May 8, 2018 8:32 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 19632


according to her current blog, her autistic grandchild is being reared by autistics
Caring4two
Posted: Tuesday, May 8, 2018 8:58 AM
Joined: 7/6/2014
Posts: 665


IIee08032 wrote:

My gut say's she becomes an expert on different illnesses and causes and then moves on to something else. She's a shrewd sociopath. Fortunately, she has moved on.... and yes we have moved on. 

Does she have autism now?

You hit the nail on the head. And yes, she claims to have autism now according to her blog. 


MissHer
Posted: Tuesday, May 8, 2018 9:04 AM
Joined: 11/13/2014
Posts: 2365


Caring4two wrote:

IIee08032 wrote:

My gut say's she becomes an expert on different illnesses and causes and then moves on to something else. She's a shrewd sociopath. Fortunately, she has moved on.... and yes we have moved on. 

Does she have autism now?

You hit the nail on the head. And yes, she claims to have autism now according to her blog. 

 I agree! I hate what she did to ( Mi .El. ) though. Mean and vicious. 


jfkoc
Posted: Sunday, May 13, 2018 4:04 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 19632


yes, moved on

"divide between the Actually Autistic Community and the very angry Neuro-Divergent Community, and how the later is harming the efforts of the former… "

from the blog...already a division to to rumble with


MissHer
Posted: Sunday, May 13, 2018 10:32 PM
Joined: 11/13/2014
Posts: 2365


Hmmm interesting, You can't leave a comment though.