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The toll on your spouse
Posted: Tuesday, February 8, 2022 4:30 PM
Joined: 4/23/2021
Posts: 1

I recently took the test where they analyze your spinal fluid. I'm definitely heading down the road of Alzheimer's disease. I don't want to burden my wife with caring for me to the end. I'm in otherwise excellent health so it's likely I'll die from Alzheimer's rather than something else. Are there specific indications in the course of the disease of when a person with the disease is incapable of commiting suicide?
Posted: Tuesday, February 8, 2022 8:08 PM
Joined: 10/30/2020
Posts: 34

Suicide really isn't the answer.  Besides it is extremely selfish and hard on your loved ones, wife, children, grandchildren all will really suffer if you do that.  DON'T DO IT.


  I have it too and am taking Aricept and Donepezil to do everything possible to prolong my clarity.  The road ahead is uncertain for sure, yet is great to live with family and friends as long as possible.  the diagnosis so is not an immediate death sentence.  With current medical assistance we could at least another 20 years, maybe more.  Instead of thinking or panning a future suicide I suggest you talk with your Primary care physician, possibly a mental health professional. even your Pastor or Priest.  All are very willing to help.  The 24/7 ALZ help line is awesome.  They really know there stuff.  1-800-272-3900   YES IT IS FREE AND EXTREMELY CONFIDENTIAL

Simply talking to others on this site even live chat is a huge benefit and HELP!!!!!!

YOUR SPOUSE AND FAMILY WANT TO BE THERE FOR YOU.  BEING STRONG IS ASKING THEM FOR HELP.  PLEASE DON'T TRY TO HIDE THIS.  You have lots going for you for sure.  Take a deep breath or 2-3 then blow out all those bad thoughts out and away..

I am really glad you are in great physical health.  That really is a gift and wonderful Blessing .  I would gladly continue this,  just let me know .  I will watch this site, for further thoughts.  TAKE CARE  EllisA

Iris L.
Posted: Wednesday, February 9, 2022 1:40 AM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 18715

Welcome lightseeker.  I felt very bad like you at one time.  I was told by the head geriatrician at an Alzheimer's Disease Research Center, "you have to accept that you have Alzheimer's!"  I fell into a deep depression.  I got out of the depression thanks to the other patients on this message board.  They lead me to fight for my life.  I resolved that, if I did have dementia, I was not going down like a victim!  I resolved to do WHATEVER IT TOOK for myself.  I was not going to sit in a corner and wait to die.  I was not going to be a burden on my family.  I would do whatever it takes to maintain my independence.


I have been in problematic health for over three decades.  No one knows how long we will live.  But we can have some input into the quality of our lives.  This is what I believe, and this is what I am doing for myself.  Living with dementia is extremely difficult.  Most people, including close friends and family, don't understand anything about dementia and don't want anything to do with it.  We patients have to figure out a lot for ourselves.  And try to find supportive people to be in our lives.  There is a lot that we can do for ourselves.


For me, suicide is not the answer.  I hope to live until my natural death.  This has been discussed and there are many threads.  Patients who might be eligible for assisted suicide have to have a life expectancy of less than six months.  I cannot comment on any other type of plan.


The diagnosis of Alzheimer's Disease is a rule out diagnosis, after all other possible medical or psychiatric or other caused of memory loss have been searched for and treated.  There are many dementia mimics.  There must be a significant decline over time.  Abnormal spinal fluid alone is not enough to make a diagnosis of Alzheimer's Disease, IMO.


I agree talking with a Care Consultant on the Helpline can be a great support to you.  They are knowledgeable and available 24 hours a day, and there is no charge.  I hope you can connect with them soon!  Please keep posting.  There are not many patients posting now, but those who do post want to help.


Iris L