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Mom COMPLETELY dressed herself today!!!!!!!!
quote:Originally posted by connie jane:I too am pleased for you. My Mom is 79 and has lived in Memory Care for two years. I live two states away and have tried to meet her needs long distance because she has so many friends and family in the county she was born in and has lived in all her life. For a whole year before Mother moved to Memory Care, I called her my "pajama girl" because she didn't dress anymore, felt bad a lot of the time and stayed in bed all the time.She needed to be upright more, eat better food, let someone else shop and cook, be around more people and have someone else to lock the door at night. My three brothers who live in the same town as her "let" me do almost everything long distance. They wouldn't clean or throw out bad food. I did that every 6-9 weeks when I came to see her for a week.Now, as I said she lives in Memory Care. When it doesn't matter to her to be in her "home", I will bring her to nursing care where I live and can see her every day.Several keys to Mother's dressing herself:1. She only has black pull-on slacks which always look nice with her black tie shoes and only black diabetic (loose) socks.2. She has only has about 12 outfits in her closet. I change them out seasonally when I visit.3. I bought her men's jockey life muscle shirts. They have a higher neck, higher arm holes, and are thicker soft cotton. She loves the feel, stays warmer, and hardly ever puts on a bra anymore--when she does it is front-opening. 4. I have to de-clutter her apartment with each visit. I don't throw away anything important but she is "my mother the squirrel". I clean out the tiny fridge and the table tops and drawers when I visit. She can't find things in clutter--there isn't any point in her trying. On the first night of my visit, I get up after she has gone to sleep. Work for a couple of hours and the next morning she LOVES that I have "cleaned off the table top". I wish I were closer. Lots of challenges to long distance primary care giving. I know how fortunate I am that she is happy in Memory Care and they are truly wonderful. We must have come through that golden window of opportunity--Mother doesn't remember or miss the home that my Dad and she bought and lived in for fifty-five years. Three or four times a week I ask her if she would like to come for a visit and stay a day/week/year. If she ever says yes, I think I will be there before morning. Okay, I have rambled but I want to tell any who may benefit: SIMPLIFY Don't ask, do. Discussion or arguing is not really an option. Granted, I feel that I may go to hell for all the lies I have told--but I tell my Mother what makes her happy. We talk once in the morning, and once at night. I supply most information but remind myself to let her get her say in--and sometimes it is really not making any sense and we move on. She never gave up on me. Thanks.
quote:Originally posted by daughter/caregiver/teacher:OK....listen up. Since mom has come to live with me, I have ALWAYS had to help her dress AND get undressed...ESPECIALLY the bra. She has NEVER made ANY attempt to try to take her bra off when getting dressed for bed. HOWEVER.....for the last two nights, SHE has initiated getting "ready" for bed herself. She goes into her bedroom (without asking where it is!!) turns the light on (without asking where it is!), finds her PJs (without asking where they are), and last night she COMPLETELY undressed herself ..EVEN BRA!!! and put her own PJS on...comes back into the living room..walking NORMALLY (no more itsy, bitsy steps!!!)... WOW!! Isaid...WOW!1 MOM!!! You did all of that on YOUR OWN!!! You are getting SO MUCH BETTER!!! SHe smiled and says "I think I am getting better!" I said, "WOW>>>Doesn't that make you feel SO GOOD???" She says, "yes, it makes me feel like I am accomplishing something!" HOW ABOUT THAT YOU ALL?????????????????