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Wants to go home
Internal Administrator
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Joined: 1/14/2015
Posts: 40463


Originally posted by: Fluffy

The last few days hubby says he has to go home and he keeps asking where the little boy went. This usually happens toward late afternoon. Seems after he has supper he gets better. But couple times at bedtime he says he thinks he has
to go home. Says he doesn't sleep here. With thr boy I just say went home. But bedtime has become problem some nights.
Anyone have any suggestions on how to get him to go to bed. This morning it was 4 AM before I got in bed and I left him sitting in chair. He did eventually go to bed because it was mussed up this morning. Then he was up before me. Tonight he was more xonfused than usual and kind of sluring his words. Could this have been caused by the lack of skleep? I coaxed him to bed and he got in with his clothes on. First time for that. Said he was just resting and didn't want to go to sleep yet. Coaxed him to get undressed and in bed., He was talking to himself as usual but in less than 5 min. quiet.
I'm thinking he was just tired. Any other opinions?
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: Fluffy

Hello Starling
No husband can't get out of the house at night. I had keyed deadbolts installed on the doors. Did that over a year ago when he would wander. First 2 times he was just up the block and I called him home. Last time I couldn't find him and had the pilice looking for him. I finally found him in an apartment complex on the corner.But he doesn't wander now. He's a little more feeble being 93 and had broken hip in Mar. Gets around house ok but is unsteady on feet (balance problems)so he stays put.
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: Starling

I've got no good suggestions. My husband got placed because he needed to "go home" so badly he got out of the house and headed for who knows where. It was no longer safe to keep him home.

Can your husband get out of the house while you are sleeping? Because like it or not we all need to sleep. It was what I feared most the last night he was home.
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: Carolina Songbird

It sounds like sundowning. I would give his doctor a heads up and see if anything can be done. Some ADLOs benefit from a very mild sleeping pill (or just another med, like an anti-depressant like Trazodone that tends to make people sleepy) or melatonin.

You're right, fatigue will worsen his mental state -- and yours, too!
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: Starling

fluffy, from everything you have said, here and in other threads, your husband is early in the last stages of the disease. Easily Stage 6 and possibly Stage 7. Most patients never get to Stage 7 before they die, so that is what is really on your plate.

My husband is there too. Possibly he has gone into Stage 7 even though he can still walk. One nurse at the nursing home told me he is going to be one of the patients who walk right up to the end.

Have you considered getting your husband a hospice evaluation. With dementia it is possible for hospice to go on for years, but you will get extra help dealing with him, and also some place to go for face to face advice. With the history of a hip replacement, he has more than one thing wrong with him and getting him on hospice will be easier.

They have a lot of experience dealing with pain and suffering and keeping the patient out of pain.
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: cissy55

Our mother does the same thing - wanting to go home. A caregiver lives with her but she calls starting early evening and before meds did not sleep. As it is we do not want to call daily (like we used to) or go over except (with the exception of weekends) because of the turmoil it will cause her. We also are considering having her placed in an ALF soon. Are we making the right decision?
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: quarterhosslady

Just a thought. Have you tried giving him benedril. It usually put Pat to sleep. We have having the same kind of issues here. Good luck.
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: meeko11

I would be very leery about using banadryl with the elderly. http://www.healthcentral.com/a.../news-290406-98.html
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: JAB

Hi, fluffy. That does sound like sundowning. There are good articles on how to cope with sundowning at:
http://alzheimers.boomja.com/A...undowning-31322.html
I particularly like Edyth Ann Knox's article.


And there's also an article on dealing with sleep disturbances which might give you some good ideas:
http://alzheimers.boomja.com/A...turbances-61711.html

Meeko11 is quite right, any med that contains diphenhydramine (Benadryl) -- including most over-the-counter sleep aids -- should not be given to dementia patients. Benadryl counteracts what drugs such as Aricept, Exelon, and Razadyne/galantamine do in the brain.

If you want to try something outside-the-box, we've been talking about a possible treatment for helping with insomnia and agitation that you could discuss with the doctor:
http://alzheimers.infopop.cc/e...=309307664#309307664
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: Mimi S.

Hi Cissy 55,
Welcome to our boards. Your query seems to have gotten lost among the other problems being addressed.

You might want to start a new thread by pulling down "start a new discussion'. Put a topic in the small box and what you want to say in the larger box.

I am biased and am a person 82 years of age and with AD. I strongly feel that if you can afford it, Assisted Living is the best. Do look for a place with a dementia unit. Take your time. Use find to search for links to ALF.

http://alzheimers.infopop.cc/e...75102261/m/293306053
When I was looking for a place for myself, a relative in the business wrote the above for me.

Take our time. Once you think you've found the place, pop in unannounced. What's going on. And check both the Assisted living and the dementia unit.
Under what conditions would they ask someone to leave.
Is there a resident council? May you sit in on a meeting? (A negative answer to sitting in is not necessarily bad. Residents may not feel free to speak with a stranger present.)
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:20 PM
Originally posted by: ipoe

My DH wants to go home all the time , too. Every day, sometimes several times. It may be in the morning or any time of day..but when he goes to bed, he sleeps well for about 9 hours or so. Dr. said not to give him anything like tylenol p.m. even..As long as he sleeps well, they are reluctant to give him anything for anxiety. because of me, they gave him something once and he had such a reaction to it, that he ran off 2 times, but didn't get far, and by the time i got to him, his mood had changed completely for the better..right now, for instance, he is getting irratated because i won't take him "home". No amount of distraction satisfies him. after the distraction, he still wants to go Home.i am taking 10MG or Lexapro and it does help to keep me from breaking into tears at the drop of a hat..I know that people watch you to see how you handle diversity and that determines your true character, but it pushes my patience to the absolulte limit! I am going to get a day off tomorrow..one of his Sons is going to come and stay while i go shopping in a nearby city with my Sister..I can't wait..
 
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