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Won't wear depends
Internal Administrator
Posted: Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:57 PM
Joined: 1/14/2015
Posts: 40463


Originally posted by: nasus

Mom has been in an ALF for about 18 months. She is lucid and ambulatory and can dress and feed herself.

While she had problems with stool incontinence prior to entering the ALF, the episodes are becoming increasingly frequent. She had an episode in my car last week and never even blinked - did not ask to be taken to the bathroom, no apology, nothing.

I spoke with the ALF staff today and they reported that she refuses to wear Depends. Her underwear has been taken away and she just wears her slacks. Yuk. They are thinking about putting linoleum in her room and she ruined a chair. She almost appears to be getting perverse pleasure in putting the staff in the position of having to clean up after her.

They suggested threatening to take her TV out of her room (she loves her TV) until she complies. I am not sure about that. She is very stubborn.

Am sure I am not the first to encounter this problem and am looking for suggestions.
Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:57 PM
Originally posted by: FLwife

Carolina Songbird response was really right. Our LOs do not want to be dirty even if they are stubborn. One important point that I have learned and you are learning, the basic nature of the person continues and you have a stubborn one. Punishment is wrong and will not result in an improvement. This is not a place that understands this disease no matter what they tell you. I also suggest that you take a look at the various brands of "diapers" (never use this word - they are "underwear")as the fit varies. She may dislike the "baggy-butt" that some have. Take a look at the Teva brand and get the right size - her dignity is important.
quote:
Originally posted by Carolina Songbird:
Nasus, you may want to post this on the Caregivers forum as well, where it will get instant replies, I am sure.

If the caregivers there think threatening removal of privileges will fix the problem, she's in the wrong place. She isn't being this way on purpose. Her brain can no longer process the signal that she needs to urinate or figure out how to do that in an acceptable manner. Some people are able to handle this by putting regular panties over the Depends. There are just so many things wrong with this situation my mind boggles.

Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:57 PM
Originally posted by: Johanna C.

Great idea Christy. Also, just a heads up, this is a thread from 2009, so some of the responses are from that year.

Johanna C.
Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:57 PM
Originally posted by: Christy1117

I had trouble with grandma not wanting to wear them. I found that getting the ones that are not adjustable so they look more like underwear and not calling them diapers helped a lot. i call them disposable underwear. It seems to work she is in stage 5-6 and still lucid and mobile. she likes to leave the house not much of a talker anymore.
Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:58 PM
Originally posted by: SherylS

My DH used to have a lot of diarrhea but I now have him take an Imodium tablet every day and I've switched him to Lactose Free milk. He's had not more problems.
Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:58 PM
Originally posted by: SnowyLynne

I think depends or Assurance from WalMart are the best thing to cross the pike,but that's how i feel.I'd rather wear them if need be & did for 10 yrs.just so I didn't have to be housebound..........
Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:58 PM
Originally posted by: Cecilia, aka, Ces

nasus:

My mother, God rest her soul, was like that, refusing to wear depends or any other incontinence pull-ons. But that didn't stop me and my sister(her caregivers), from putting them on her. Boy, did she ever resisted wearing them and when she would soil them, she'd toss them aside or hide them in the closet.
Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:58 PM
Originally posted by: Carolina Songbird

Nasus, you may want to post this on the Caregivers forum as well, where it will get instant replies, I am sure.

If the caregivers there think threatening removal of privileges will fix the problem, she's in the wrong place. She isn't being this way on purpose. Her brain can no longer process the signal that she needs to urinate or figure out how to do that in an acceptable manner. Some people are able to handle this by putting regular panties over the Depends. There are just so many things wrong with this situation my mind boggles.
Anonymous
Posted: Thursday, January 5, 2012 2:58 PM
Originally posted by: SnowyLynne

Sounds like you need a better place for her.........
 
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