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My first post(2)
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:18 PM
Originally posted by: MimaVicky

Hi Marion, This is also my first post. You are not alone. It sounds like my husband is in the same stage as yours. When my husband starts the "this is not our home," I try to show him his favorite things and tell him a story about how he aquired the things and that seems to soothe him. When he says there are people here I take him through the house to show him we are alone or I'll say that there was someone here but they had to go. Also, I found a wonderful Senior DayCare (the club)to take him to. My husband enjoys the socializing. They do crafts, have lunch, sing alongs, and so on. He won't do any of that at home. These few hours that he spends at the Club also give me time to relax. I hope I have been helpful.
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:18 PM
Originally posted by: AlphaLeah

Sometimes a small dose of Celexa can help with agitation. Celexa is an SSRI (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor) that is used as an antidepressant and anti-anxiety medication.

If he is not on a similar medication, perhaps you could ask his doctor about something like this?

Clonazepam is an anti-anxiety medication but it is known to sometimes cause dysphoria - or a worsening of mood - once a given dose begins to wear off. Something also to ask his doctor about.

I'm so sorry. It's so very hard. I hate this disease.
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:18 PM
Originally posted by: Mark ORDCG

quote:
Originally posted by Marion E:
this is my first post. My husband is 71 and has AD. The AD is progressing rapidly now. He has been taking Namenda and Excelon since 2006 when the diagnosis was made. Just last week he started to get angry with me. I cannot convince him that he is home and he becomes upset when I won't take him "home". I have gone as far as driving a few towns away and coming back home. That settles him for a short time. He still knows our address but does not believe that our house is his home. This begins from early morning and is causing me so much stress and is exhausting me. Also, he is convinced that there are other people in the house. Not actually seeing them but saying "where did the people go ?". He mentions his Mother a lot and wants to visit her so I have to tell him that she passed away. I just wonder how much more I can take without breaking.

I have help from family; but, as you all know the day to day of this disease is so hard on us. I feel alone, afraid and frustrated.

I have been reading posts for months and all of you have helped me through other rough patches. I knew now was the time I had to write.

Thanks you for listening.

Marion


Marion,
My Mom went through very much the same scenario but worse she would sneak out of the house and run away; looking for her Mom (died in Poland) and her sisters, some of whom are here in the U.S. and one who's in Poland. Please continue to be patient. It sounds like you're doing a GREAT job but YES you're under a lot of stress. I used to think the day was 36 hours long when my Mom would keep repeating all of this from the time she woke up until bedtime. Perhaps a Adavan, Klonopin or one of the drugs that will just "take the edge off" would help him relax a bit and not be so highly wired. Mom is currently taking Adavan which makes her to be LESS ANXIOUS through the day but then again she's in a hospital bed at home, on Hospice and in the final stages of AD. The anti-anxiety meds do work and along continued care from you, could make life less horrible. Also remember, every action DOESN'T require a reaction from you. Sometimes less is more; not answering or just saying something to pacify the patient. Good luck and keep us informed as how you're both doing.
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:18 PM
Originally posted by: quarterhosslady

I have a friend that told me to sit down by my husband with an picture album and tell them where they are. It helps my husband and really calms him. today he came in and said lets get out of here. At least he is taking me along with him.
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:18 PM
Originally posted by: gloraya

Hi there. I am caring for my 72 YO husband who is end stage. We relocated last March 1 and he was doing pretty well. Then colon cancer struck again and we did radiation for 5 treatments to try to eliminate the pain. Well, the pain went away, along with the cancer, and I think a lot of the brain as well. He has no clue who I am and can do nothing for himself. I had to put him in a nursing home last year for two weeks while I had surgery and I will never, ever do that again. It was horrible. If I were not there to care for him he would probably be dead. I am caring for him at home. I gave up my career (I'm only mid 50s) to stay home and care for him. I have had him in adult daycare for the last three years. He did pretty well until recently. I just took him out two weeks ago and am doing it alone at home. I have assistance for 4 hours a day while I run around or just have them to talk to. As mentioned earlier, we just moved last year and I have had no time to go out and meet new friends. I guess you all will be my friends. I am feeling very alone and need someone to talk to since I don't get out to group meetings. My house is always messy and I'm always tired and haggard looking but my priority now is not me or my house -- it is him. I am doing all I can do to make his last days on this earth good ones so that when I go to bed I can rest knowing I have done all I can do for him. I hope I am doing the best thing. Thank you all for listening to me babble. Take care and I look forward to becoming friends with you all. Marion, you are doing a great job. Please don't quit or give up. Keep up the great work!
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:18 PM
Originally posted by: Mimi S.

Welcome Vicky and Gloraya,
Welcome to you both. We are so glad you found us. It does sound from what you've written that Gloraya's husband is further down the journey.

I would advise each of you to call and chat with your local chapter of the Aliz. Assoc. Hit chapter, below. Some chapters have a case worker who comes to the homes, does an assessment of what help is available.

Also ask about support groups for yourself.

Another great source of help is the local County Agency on the Aging:
http://www.n4a.org/about-n4a/?fa=aaa-title-VI

If the Aliz. chapter doesn't have people to visit and make an assessment, the Aging office most likely will. They are another source for help. They can put you in touch with agencies that provide respite.

And Gloraya, also ask about Hospice. They also will come and do an evaluation. They can be so much help to you as the end nears.

See you around.
Anonymous
Posted: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 5:18 PM
Originally posted by: gloraya

Mimi,

Thanks for the tips. Yes, my husband is end-stage. He was in hospice last year for a few months when he was given a few months to live (get this, from colon cancer but as you can see he has survived and is now cancer free). I found them to be somewhat helpful. I guess he was not as bad off as he should have been to have them here more often. I know his days are coming and when it gets to that time I will call hospice. It is even better since he is already on record with them. I am planning to get to a support group once I finish unpacking and getting all moved in -- hopefully the next month or so. Thanks again for your suggestions.
 
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