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Spouse or Partner Caregiver Forum
Just need to talk to my friends(22)
Twink -how nice of you to think of your co-worker in such a kind way. Probably getting away from work a little bit will help. Just think of it as a mini vacation. I know when I worked I always looked forward to three day weekends and vacations and I loved my job. Sometimes when I get back into the secretarial and reporting mode like doing taxes or business letters, I kind of miss it. But not enough to want to go back after 20 years off.
I'll look at Walmart for Tiger Balm. My neck is all right tonight but somehow I must have twisted my hip and when I first get it I can hardly walk but then it gets better. I used Theragesic and ice on my neck and back both today.
I'm glad today wasn't too awfully bad. We miss them but know they're better off than we are.
I just looked it up and Sheena is right in the middle of where a female GP should be at the shoulder - 25-29" and she's 27.
You all should have heard all the barking when I let them out and Ricky was mowing. A brush hog is noisy and it was driving them nuts. He left his big orange tractor here - he'll be back in the morning and Stormy still is barking at it - knows it's not supposed to be there. He has one pretty rig - bet it cost a cool $100,000 if not more. His tractor is a new Kubota just like the one John has who'll bring up the hay tomorrow. I think he told me it cost somewhere around $75,000. I'll love to have one of those with a cab but at my age a new tractor isn't practical.
He didn't get all of the west pasture finished. Said some of the berry vines were so big and tough they stopped the tractor - but he didn't push it. He said he'd spray those. It'll take a big dose of something very strong to get rid of them. But, what he got finished really looks nice. I just hate weeds and they're everywhere this year.
Sandy - Thank you, I'm better this afternoon. I hope you like your new washer. Every time I use mine (Maytag) I tell it that I hate it. We used to have a Maytag that I loved. It kept getting things wrong with it and the repairman said it would cost more to have it fixed than a new one would cost - so got another new Maytag. If I'd known then what I know how, I'd have had it fixed anyway. It take sooo long to do a load - guess that's what aggravates me the most. Maybe the GE will be much better. Sandy, Charles took Memantine from the VA. Don't know anything about the cost.
Sandra - please repost. Anxious to see pictures and always like to hear about Australia. I always wanted to go to Australia and New Zealand.
Diane - you'll love having a lawn service. We don't have anything to edge but he mow and weedeats and that's enough. I never did like to mow much but Charles enjoyed it.
Last year our vet gave me the name of a company that has wheeled creepfeeders. The 4' size which will hold about 2T (not sure) runs about $1500. I'd love to have one so I could move it around. It gets so muddy in front of it where the calves have to stand to eat. Maybe I can make it with this one until I quit.
Leanne - I have the sacks of creep in the back of the pickup and the back of the creeper is against a fence so I back up to it, climb up in the PU on a stool and drag the sacks to the creepfeeder, open it and it, really tip it over into the feeder. I've had the guys start to put the end of the sack that opens toward the back of the PU and that helps. It's not really hard to do, sometimes I put an extra sack down and put the one I'm going to empty on top of it - that's easier, too.
I think I may have figured out how to fix the feeder. I think if I wire the fence to the feeder in many places and then put a t-post in the corner, they can't move it around. Anyway, I'm going to try that. We always used to put in a t-post but this fence moved around really easily so didn't do it this time. I'll have to be sure to get it in so I can pull it if I want to move the feeder. I'm not sure about lowering or raising the bar. I think it's the bigger calves that are trying to get in that are moving it around - may lower it s bit more. The fence was just the creeper fence and I think I jerked on it too hard to move it - should use my noggin a bit more or maybe a lot more. Anyway, I was in the PU and too lazy to go back for the CW.
So, you had coffee with Dale. I'm glad for you. He sounds like a good man and it sounds like you enjoy being around him. I hope, too, the one year anniversary won't be too awfully bad. How time does fly.
I hope the fires are beginning to diminish. I know the smoke yesterday evening scared me. I'd be a nervous wreck if there was smoke around all the time. Glad the cattle are out of harm's way.
This evening I put Charlene in the stall and pen and let Christy, Dolly and the boys out. Jasper is still courting and I opened the gate so he could get in. He was just standing there so I went over to the gate and petted him and told him that the gate was open and all he had to do was go in. I think he understood me because he turned around and went right in. Christy's interested now so I'll have to write down her time to calve early next June.
I'm glad you're going to get cooler weather. This is Oklahoma's transition month. At the first of this month we have almost 13 hours of sun, average high of 90 or 91 and by the end of the month we're down to 12 hours of sun with an average high in the 70s. I'm ready for it. The sun was really hot today.
Hopefully, tomorrow we'll get the hay up and most of the rest of the mowing done. I think I'll have him mow one round around the fenceline where I'm going to have the new fence put in so it'll be easier for them. I have him here and he's willing to do what I want so might as well do it. He's also going to mow on both sides of the lane down to the road. There's so many weeds it doesn't even look like anyone lives up here. He seems like a very nice man. He said his dad used to do work for daddy - that was when he was a little boy. I guess he's probably In his 50s.
Better go and find something for supper. It'll be time for bed before long. Hope all of you sleep well. Does anyone know what's going on with California Dana?
Well, everything's done, paid for and everyone's gone!
John and Larry got the hay up but John had to leave for a while and Larry misunderstood what he had told him and put 20-30 bales of hay in the wrong place and a few of the ones that stood in water for a while mixed in two rows of the good hay. John will come back this weekend and move the 20-30 bales. But, it's off the meadow and it looks pretty. Now I can let the girls down there to graze without having to eat among the weeds. They'll have to come back up to get water though. Also worried about the newest baby going down there.
Ricky got the mowing finished - looks so good, like it used to when Charles did it. He got all the berryvines he could - some were too big. He said he'd spray for me next spring. Also mowed along the fenceline where I'm going to have the new fence put in. I'm so glad all of that's done. I was almost afraid to ask how much but it wasn't nearly as much as I thought.
Funny, both of them have Kubota tractors and big white trucks, just alike. If I was 20 or even 10 years younger I'd think about one of those tractors but I like the one I have if it ever gets home.
Stormy and Sheena bark, even Susie. If I'm in the house with the TV on and the AC on and windows closed I can't hear them but they're big, booming barks.
I'm tired, even though I haven't done much. I'm going to get up really early in the morning and work on that creepfeeder. Still have to get three or four new hayrings before winter and another bunk feeder. Have you all had enough farm talk? Sorry.
It's hot outside but there's a good breeze from the south and if you're in the shade, it isn't too bad.
I wish I could find a place to order Always Save canned catfood so I wouldn't have to go into town to get it - but there's still milk, produce and ice cream to buy so guess once every two weeks isn't too bad. Still have to go for feed and I'll need another 50 lbs. of milk replacer - it's over $70 a sack.
Hope you all are having a good day. Be back later.
Hi again - for the last time today,
Sharon, we need to see a picture of your big, green frog. During July when we had so much rain there were little frogs all over the yard - don't see many now so don't know what happened to them. I love to hear the frogs at night but lately seems I'm in the house at night. That bug thing I got is really working though - have to empty it at least once a week and there are always some live ones in there.
I think I'm as tired as if I'd worked all day - guess the stress of having someone around and going out and telling them what to do. I'm sore from my waist down and my calves ache. I'd like to sit in a tub of hot or warm water but with my knee I don't know if I'd ever be able to get out - that would be awful to have to call someone to get me out of the bathtub.
I took a nap on the divan this afternoon after everyone was gone. Everything looks so nice. The cows had been foraging in the loafing area every evening so bet they were surprised that all the weeds were gone. I think I've seen the new baby this morning and this afternoon, too. Maybe tomorrow I'll be able to get out in the CW and see him for sure. I want to try to get the feeder fixed in the morning - if I'm not too sore.
Sandymac - your pictures were so pretty. Just loved the flowers. We have honeysuckle blooming now and passion flowers - mother always called them wild apricots. Both are blooming on the fence down toward the entryway and on the south fence of our yard. A while back someone was interested in seeing what a passion flower looked like. I took a picture of one this afternoon so will post it. There's several of them coming up where Bryon has mowed but there's also the dried up pods so think I'll plant some of them on the north fence.
Joan or Leanne haven't posted yet tonight so hope both of them are okay. I'll post the picture and see you all tomorrow. Sleep tight!
Gosh, so many posts to catch up and see what everyone's doing. I did post on my tablet after you posted, Leanne, but hit the wrong key and lost it and just didn't have the energy to redo it.
You're the one who got things accomplished yesterday. It's been years since I've dug a posthole - I guess the last time was when Charles and I put in a new gate because it was too muddy to get through the existing one. I'm glad you got the pen finished. How in the heck do you hang a 10 ft. gate by yourself? Those were some of the biggest arguments Ray and I had, except putting tinting on car windows. We put the things to hang them on in the post and then had to get the hinges over them so it took some doing.
Sharon, I'm glad you found this wonderful place to come and visit - that's mostly what this thread is about. Glad your husband is enjoying it, too.
Joan - hope you enjoy your visit with Harv today and have a safe trip. It's pretty cool here in the mornings but by 10 a.m. it's beginning to get hot. Weather's supposed to change next week.
Where the guy mowed looks great. I drove up in the pasture this morning to see the new baby - saw her from a distance but saw everyone else and it looked so nice. He's mowed around most of the fences, all he could mow in the west pasture, in front of the house, in the cattle's loafing area and behind the barn and most importantly down the road on both sides to the county line. I'm considering calling and asking for a quote to see how much he'd charge to do the rest of it. I had it all mowed last year and it was so nice, for me and the girls. I was going to spray everything this spring but couldn't do it because of all the rain. Maybe if I get it done this year, I can get it sprayed next year. Ricky doesn't bale hay so that wouldn't get in the way. I think there's still about 75 acres to mow because I won't have the meadow mowed and the west pasture is done and he's mowed around the fences. I'm glad that's done because it will be so much easier for the men to put in the new fence. I'll think about it a while.
Bonnie - I'm so sorry for what Bill had to go through - and you, too. I hope there wasn't too much pain for him. However they go, it's hard but that was just too much. After daddy's surgery he was on a ventilator and it was so hard for him but so hard for us also to have it removed. I'll never forget that. Also I know how hard it is to have to wait for the funeral - is it because there are people coming from a distance? Don't worry about what his kids say - you've done what you needed to do and that's enough. I wouldn't answer the e-mails either. That is just too hard on you with all the rest. We had Charles' service four days after he passed away to give time for his relatives to make arrangements to come and that was long enough. We're all here with you now and will be at the service beside you. All of you were with me and I know how much that helped.
Diane - didn't see the picture of the hay ring. Ours are old and metal and pretty bent up. They have plastic ones now but they're so expensive. I think I can make it with three new ones. The cows don't get in but the babies do. They get in and cuddle up in the hay and sometimes play when the hay gets low in them. I remember when Charles and I were feeding. He's go get the hay with the tractor and I'd stay where the rings were. If it was cold and sunny I'd crawl up into the ring (by that time the hay was pretty low in them,) and lay in the sun until he came back. We had a dog named Lady then and she'd get in with me.
For some reason this posted and I can't scroll down to see what to answer so I'm going to post it and then post another one. Sorry.
Hate when that happens.
Sandra - How wonderful it would be to have a white tree like your pink one. We have lots of dogwoods here and on Honor Heights Drive, the street that goes up to the VAMC and on down into Honor Heights Park, there used to be a house with white and pink dogwoods - how beautiful they were. How long do the blooms last on your tree?
I think Remedy will get rid of the blackberry vines. They're huge but they're way on the west side of that pasture. They were beginning to encroach some into the meadow so he mowed them too, and I'll have them sprayed. It will really take a good dose of it to get rid of them. They'll take over if you let them and I see pastures around where they have.
I bet you did enjoy the soccer game - hope they win and I know you'll be there to cheer them on.
Diane - loved the picture of your bulldog. My friend, Karen and her husband have three they have rescued. They're all together now and she's so happy.
Leanne - I think it's good you're going to take a couple of days off - you've been working way too hard. Your hip needs a rest to get ready to chase bulls.
I'm glad you and Dale are enjoying being together. I think for almost anyone there will be that twinge of guilt but you know Don and what he'd want. I'm sure he'd want you to be happy and not alone. You said he knew Dale and thought a lot of him so think about that when you're together.
You said you were going to dig your potatoes. That seems strange to me - we always dug our potatoes on my birthday, June 21st, but of course your growing season is much shorter than ours. Do you have a cellar or somewhere you can keep them and the onions to use during the winter? Daddy always put ours in the cellar and we'd have potatoes, even if they were a bit sweet, until new potatoes were planted were ready to grabble. That was one thing he and I always did together, dig potatoes, and I really miss that. We'd also chop cotton and corn and could go for hours without talking. He was a very quiet person, very easy going until he was really riled up.
I think I got that creepfeeder fixed. I put 350 lbs. in so we'll see what happens. It has rods on the fence that fit down into kind of u-bolt type things on the feeder- those were what were broken off. I did use the CW this morning and pulled the fence around to meet the feeder and double wired it in four places tightened with the fencing tool and then chained it so it's together tightly now. Then I put a t-post in one corner of the fence so it can't be moved and wired it. Man, that ground was hard from little hooves being on it all the time. We have another older double feeder - one fence is broken but I could use the other side. There's a little bit of feed in there and it looks molded so I'm going to have to try to figure out some way to get it out - I'm surely not going to get down in there.
The little calf is staying with her mom but the problem is when they go to the meadow, they have to go through the NE pasture, around the barn and through a gate to go into the meadow. Invariably two or three calves will miss the gate and be in the wrong pasture. I still have a couple of gates to close before I can let them in and I may wait until it's cooler next week. There are trees on the west side of the meadow but no shade until just after noon. I can open one gate and try to make sure all the calves go through the other one. Really helps to have at least two people to move cattle or a good dog. Susie just likes to go over and give them sugar and not sure about the other two yet.
Joan - forgot to mention that I hope you have a good time at the anniversary party - how wonderful - 50 years together.
I'm going to wait until late this afternoon to do something with that other feeder. This morning Penny's baby was back at the lot wanting in so I have Dolly's two boys, Charlene and Penny's baby in the barn. I keep creep and barn mix in the manger and that's where they stay. Dolly and Christy are out front grazing or probably in the shade by now - almost noon.
My back, really my left hip is some better. Putting the t-post in didn't bother it - stood on a stool. It doesn't seem to hurt as much when I'm up and around - sitting bothers it and, Leanne, unlike you, I have plenty of padding - attached.
I'm almost out of catfood so will have to get into town in the morning or Saturday to get that. I ordered some things from WM this morning.
Oh, I haven't talked to my sister since the good conversation we had a few days ago and Sarah not for a day or so. She goes back to the doctor tomorrow. Hope things are better with both of them.
Be back later. Rest and enjoy the day. Bonnie, thinking of you - try to rest.
Sandy - the places where the man brushhogged looks really nice - makes the rest look bad. We have a lot of snow on the mountain. I don't know if you all are familiar with it but it grows waist high with green and white variegated leaves and has clusters of seed pods on it. When they ripen, they explode and spread the seeds everywhere. You can get some in your hand and kind of squeeze your hand and can feel them explode. These are mostly now in the east pasture. Many years ago they were really bad in the NE pasture and Charles brushhogged them. The tractor and he were yellow from pollen when he finished. I guess he got them at the right time because we haven't had many until this year. I'm going to think about it a bit and may have him finish the rest of the pastures. I hate for the cows to have to graze through the weeds even though there's lots of open grass. The pink eye is bad in some herds this year from weeds, etc. So far, so good here. We've had it in the past and it blinds the cattle.
I just got back from town - got up before daylight and got everyone fed and into town before 8 a.m. - had to wait for the feedstore to open. I had to buy another sorting stick - I've lost two in the pastures. Got the catfood and a few groceries, diesel for the PU and had my change of beneficiaries changed on my life insurance policy.
My niece who has MS and I had a very nice, long visit on the phone last evening. She'll get my sister's part of the farm when we lose her and I'm going to leave my part to her, too. She and I won't have any trouble co-owning and after I'm gone, she won't sell the farm. She was raised here for many years so loves it too. She'll probably lease to our vet. There won't be a problem with leasing when she's ready.
Her MS is progressing. She's falling a lot now and was on the front porch with her walker and fell off with it. Her last MRI showed some lesions or spots on the other side of her brain. She's only 53 and such a smart person - always been so strong and ablebodied. It's so sad that this has happened to her. They keep trying new drugs to see if they'll help - maybe one of them will. She and her mother could be such a help to each other if things were different. I had called her to tell her I was changing my beneficiary to her and she told me that I was not to worry about anything as far as the farm goes with her part when her mother passes away. So, we both felt better after the talk.
I haven't talked today with Sarah - I'll wait until she gets home from her doctor's appointment.
I think I'll probably have a nap this afternoon. I got up this morning even before Stormy and he's asleep now.
Hope everyone is well today. I'm feeling better - hip seems pretty much back to normal. Early in the morning I'll work on the other creepfeeder - too hot today.
Diane - I so hope your husband does well in the clinical trial and they find something that helps. So, he'll continue on his present medications plus the additional ones from the trial. I'm glad he was able to get into the program.
Bonnie- the suctioning sounds awfully bad and to have had his hands tied. When Charles was at home during the last few days Hospice brought a suction machine but I never used it - I know he wouldn't have cooperated. I think the nurse tried one time but realized it wouldn't work for him. But, we have to try to see if something will work - so don't regret it too much.
I'm sorry it's going to be such a long month for you. Just to get it behind you will help. I know I did pretty well (with the help of all the wonderful people on this forum) until the funeral and during but after it was over and I was alone it was very hard. I hope the month isn't too bad for you. Hopefully, you have some kind of medication to take to help you through. At least try to get as much rest as you can. I'm glad the boys are not causing trouble - don't worry about the girls.
Better go and see what needs to be done. I need to change the bed and wash the linens and maybe a few dishes - maybe tomorrow.