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Posted: Sunday, April 14, 2019 8:26 AM
Joined: 3/21/2019
Posts: 21

Last night Mom complains of toothache. Had her take Tylenol before bed. Will need to get her to dentist if continues to bother her. Along with late early stage dementia Mom (90 yo) has a kyphosis. Difficult for her to keep head up. 

Sister took Mom for cleaning several months ago. Very po'd with dentist office. Difficult to clean due to kyphosis. They complained. Mom not doing good job cleaning. Last filling they put in came out. Wanted to schedule additional fillings. Mom quite anxious of course. Mom's 90. We decided that unless Mom complains we are done with dentists and specifically that office. Mom unhappy, regular guy at practice retired. Now she has a toothache.

Need to figure out who to call Monday morning. Got a list on-line of local dentists. Know who not to call. Guess I'll just start calling and explain situation. Any suggestions on how best to handle.

Posted: Sunday, April 14, 2019 5:42 PM
Joined: 4/1/2014
Posts: 4783

Wish I had helpful advice. I worked at a dentist office and took mother for years to see the dentist every 3 months-but there came a time when mother could no longer comply so we had to stop. I feel bad about "neglecting" her mouth health, but what can I do?

I think you have a good plan and hopefully a dentist with geriatric experience can be found. Good luck!

Posted: Sunday, April 14, 2019 6:21 PM
Joined: 10/24/2018
Posts: 244

Hi Misty-- oof not a good situation! This is going to sound loony to you, but check online or on autism forums to see if any dentists in your area have a specialty for people with sensory issues. This might be primarily autistic youngsters, but my Mom displays many sensory behaviors that my autistic son did as a baby, toddler, and right through to adulthood. (He's nearly 29, and last 4th of July Went To See Fireworks!!). Any such specialist will be way more open to taking the time to be sure your mom is prepared and comfortable with each little step of the visit. 

My MIL had a toothache at 92 which resulted in an extraction. This was botched in a way that sent her to the ER where she nearly died of suffocation due to a crazy ER dr who refused to reach into her mouth to pull out a blood clot which was entirely blocking her airway. A nurse stepped in (terminally exasperated no doubt), and pulled out a clot the size of the palm of her hand.  !!!! Life saved. Dentist who'd said blithely, oh no, she need not stop her blood thinner for this extraction(!!!).... came in to the hospital on a weekend, dern tootin he'd better, and added several sutures to the ONE he'd used originally. 

I think she had another stroke while in hospital that time too. 

You don't want this story. 

Pretty sure we'd already decided, no more dentists for Granny unless pain presented. Mom, otoh, asks to go bc she knows she should! At 91! I have an excellent place I go, where they "got" my kids immediately. They'll "get" Mom too, esp as my particular dentist just recently took his own MIL into his home with dementia. 

Anyway, best of luck tomorrow! Meanwhile, maybe a little Numbzit or Anbesol- whatever is used on teething babies? Or clove oil. That stuff works!

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