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Notes and reminders are disappearing
Are you sure she can still read or understand what it says and
Why not put the notes and dry erase board somewhere else, where she won't easily find them?
Your mom may have lost the ability to understand the notes or to understand the reason why you wrote the note.
Notes did not work for my mom. Deep breath here... because I did not realize how far along she was. She would ask me to write down her appointments which of course I did. But she could no longer understand time or read a calendar. I would write post it notes on her door. She would lose them. I would put them on her bathroom mirror.
I finally realized that she could no longer be a partner in this part of her life. I would arrive at her place an hour before an appointment in case she was at an activity or still in her nightgown. This allowed me to get her dressed or gently remove her from the activity. Sometimes she would be waiting for me at the door of the facility two hours before the time I told her and then would call me in a huff complaining that I was late.
When she stopped showering ... again I never realized it was happening... I left notes reminding her to take a shower. What I never realized was that in her mind, she had been showering everyday and did not understand what the note meant and why I would write such a thing.
She now is in stage 6 in a MC unit and at each visit she becomes obsessive about my phone number. She has my phone number in at least 7 places in her room. She has lost the ability to use the phone. I patiently write it down again. She 'reads' it to me (with errors that I ignore) and confirms it with me no less than a dozen times. As much as I deflect to other topics... I can't get her to stop. What I understand is that my phone number is her link to me when I am not there and it is of extreme importance to her. But still... it is so hard to go through each time.
Just take it one day at a time.
What I understand is that my phone number is her link to me when I am not there and it is of extreme importance to her.
Hi Abuela--wonder if getting your mom a stuffed animal with a recorder inside would help--you could record a brief message and she could hear your voice without having to remember a phone number.
My DH lost the ability to comprehend notes very early, and it took me a stupid long time to realize it. He could read the words out loud, if asked, but they got lost somewhere along the way before he could act on them.
Lists of food in the fridge—-for lunch or snacks—was the worst. He could read the words if I asked him, then he’d just stand there with the door open, staring inside. I could say “here’s the whatever,” and he goes “ohhh I did not know”. About 15 seconds after he read it aloud....
I still don’t understand it, but I do know notes just stop working.
What sunny bebe said is spot on.
The phone numbers, I have no idea.
My mother throws away notes. She even threw out a big poster I made! She keeps taking bandages off and taking a shower with a dressing when told not to etc. etc. Notes make no difference at all. I tried leaving a note telling her she had already ordered a meal but that didn't work either.