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Gift Wrapping Sadness
Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2019 7:28 AM
Joined: 8/5/2019
Posts: 12

Most of the Christmas present shopping is done now for kids and grand kids (thanks Amazon). Had all the presents in boxes in the spare bedroom, but DW would go thru them and carry them to different places thru-out the house. I decided that it would be easier to just wrap them up and put them under tree. She was always the best wrapper, so neat and tidy with pretty bows. She did all the wrapping for the past 48 years of our marriage including last year. She gets on me often for not letting her do things, so I thought what great joy it will be to let her wrap presents. I got all the wrapping paper, scotch tape and presents all organized on the dining room table for her. She took the first present, rolled out the wrapping paper a little, and then just sat there. After a minute I tried to help a little, and she said maybe you could wrap the presents this year. Another skill lost to this horrible disease. She seemed to take it well, but I had all I could do to hold back the tears. Just so sad!
Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2019 8:26 AM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 11870

So sorry - just another thing alz. or dementia takes from us and our loved one.  Gift wrapping isn't an easy thing, at least for me, measuring, knowing where to put the tape and making the bows.  It's just gotten to be too hard for her - too frustrating. 

Maybe you could start wrapping them and she'd kind of remember how to do it and join it.  Again, sorry.  Christmas is not for the weak, especially if dementia is mixed in.

Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2019 8:51 AM
Joined: 4/2/2018
Posts: 3057

I'm sorry you're dealing with the loss. When my wife was going to make pancakes, but couldn't do it - -  well, it just about killed me. I know where you're coming from.
Katy sue
Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2019 9:51 AM
Joined: 9/24/2016
Posts: 453

I, too, know how you feel. DH was an engineer so all gift wrapping done by him. Perfect measurements and they looked wonderful. I’m not so good. What I did in those days was just give him a simple one step job to do. Perhaps choosing the premade  bow to match or to stick on the nametag. Just one simple job. Get premade  bows. Easier and it takes away frustration. Don’t let her sign the name tags. Too complex. You do that. She can place them on the package. When caregivers scale down expectations, everyone is more relaxed. And happiness returns. Focus on what she still can do in a scaled down version. Wishing you all the best this season!
Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2019 9:55 PM
Joined: 11/29/2019
Posts: 115

Katy Sue

Great advice on the gift wrapping! I'm just starting this journey with my DH and I'm so glad I found this site because the tips, advice and support from people going through the same thing is exactly what I was searching for. Thank you!

Posted: Thursday, December 5, 2019 10:09 PM
Joined: 11/29/2019
Posts: 115

IWBH 1990. I'm sorry to hear about what you're going through. I'm sure it's especially difficult at this time of year. My DH was a mechanical wizard and he too has lost some of his abilities ( early stage).  For the most part I try to remain positive but there are those times when I think about what lies ahead and can't hold back the tears. One day at a time. Wishing you peace!
Posted: Friday, December 6, 2019 12:47 PM
Joined: 5/7/2018
Posts: 433

Every year my husband would wrap his presents to me and put some silly and often personal only to us thing on the tags. They were always amusing and sweet. How I wish I had saved them now. Who knew that he wouldn't be writing such things into our 90's? Every little thing we lose is another heartbreak.
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