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Just need to talk to my friends(3)
Lorita
Posted: Wednesday, July 24, 2013 3:04 PM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Good evening, 

 

As I said at the start of #2 - well, here we go again!  

 

As you all may know, I can't always remember who said what, when, etc. 

 

Now, I'm wondering who it was a while back that was trying to decide whether to have someone come in to help three or five days a week.   I think either Shirley or Cynthia - but not sure - so sorry! 

 

I need to ask a question about this.   Whether this program is through the VA and, if so, what is it called.    I talked with the social worker today about it and she wasn't sure what it was.   She says programs, if they're connected with the state, vary.    

 

She was explaining different programs that are available - not ready for any yet.  She says they change from year to year.    

 

She asked about a support group and I told her about all of you.  She wasn't aware there was a group like this online.    I told her it was the best ever! 

 

So - if whoever was starting this new program for home care, let me know.  Kind of need to compare it with what the SW told me.   Thanks. 

 

 


ElyVet
Posted: Wednesday, July 24, 2013 7:34 PM
Joined: 11/30/2011
Posts: 604


Good evening all:

 

Lorita it was not me that talked about care coming in. Bill will not have it.

 

Bill is off most of his meds and he seems to be almost brain washed,if that is possible. He is listening to music from 1965 and he can't remember very much for the last 10-15 years. But he says I do  not have Alz. He says DR. told him it was all the meds he was on. She told him to think of a time when he was happy and stay in that phase of mind. So he said it was before Vietnam and that leaves me and the boys out of the picture. He said the war took all his youth.  She used Yoga and meditation as her treatment.

 

I just don't know where to go from here. DR. coming next Friday and he said the DR. at the care center could not take him off his meds that are not for mental problems, but she did.  He said he will talk to Bill and see if he can get him to start back taking the meds for his diseases.

 

He said he was going to sue the VA for making him a drug addict like the DR (Psy) at the center told him they did to him.  What he doesn't understand he asked for help from the VA because he had a complete breakdown before they found his cancer.

 

I worry about him having another TIA or something else going wrong before they get him straighten out.

 

I can't see my kids or grand kids and it is getting so lonely with no one to talk to. His mother finally came back home from her trip and she came to see him on Tuesday. It was a very cold visit. When she was leaving she said he is really different. She will be 92 in 2 weeks and I can see how bad this is making her feel. I just can't give her any help with the situation.

 

Thanks for listening and keep us in your prayers.

Shirley

 

 

 

 


terromari
Posted: Wednesday, July 24, 2013 9:02 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 859


Don't know what happened but I was looking at posts and I got a note that the post was reported. Sorry--it was a mistake.
Sea Field
Posted: Wednesday, July 24, 2013 10:10 PM
Joined: 8/5/2012
Posts: 1872


Terromari,  it's easy to hit the wrong button.  I've done it before.  I would guess the administrators see this all the time.  No worries.

  

Lorita, I don't think it was me either.  Tom uses adult daycare but not in-home care.  I was wondering if I might have to bring someone in if I needed surgery or treatment for the cancer.  But I haven't looked into it.  And definitely not with the VA.  Tom was in Nam for 6 years but was not a career soldier.

  

Johanna,  Sorry the EBV is kicking your butt.  Having done a couple of rounds with EBV I know how ridiculous the fatigue can be.  It's a lot easier to look back on once it is over.   But during the episode it can be hard to remember that it will eventually end.  So sorry.

  

Shirley,  I don't even begin to know what to say.  What a ridiculous situation.  You and Bill continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.  Sure hope this gets worked out soon.

  

Hope it's a quiet night.  Blessings everyone.  Cynthia


Lorita
Posted: Wednesday, July 24, 2013 10:27 PM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Good evening, 

 

Shirley, do you think the doctor could restart Bill's medications for his AD and not tell him?   I think I'd have them do that for Ray if he wouldn't take his meds.    Hard to know though unless you're really in that situation. 

 

I'm sorry it's so lonely for you - wish I was close so we could have coffee or lunch together and visit and let Ray and Bill visit a bit.   They'd probably enjoy that.  It seems that servicemen all seem to get along and enjoy each other's company. 

 

I know it's hard for you to see Bill like this - maybe when the doctor visits he can figure out what to do.   That's HBPC, isn't it?   We've finally finished with all the initial visits from the Team.   We like all of them.   I think the RN will visit again next month.  Ray has an appointment with the Podiatrist and Wound Clinic August 1st but if it's really hot I'm going to reschedule. 

 

The weather just said Tulsa had wind gusts last night of 91 mph.  Probably around 50 or so here.   We didn't have any damage but Tulsa really caught it.    Looks like we may get more rain tomorrow night and Friday, 1-2".   I'm tickled pink with the rain we got last night - 1.75" - came at a perfect time because we just got all the hay off the meadow yesterday and now it can grow again.  Not sure if we'll bale again or let the girls graze. 

 

Cynthia, the social worker today was talking about if the situation arose that I couldn't care for Ray for a short time, that he could be placed in a VA contract nursing home for that time if a bed wasn't available at the VA.  He's 100% SC so I don't know if that would apply otherwise or not. 

 

Since I've thought about it, it may have bee catlady who was debating about the number of days to have care come in.    

 

Ray's foot is better and he hasn't fallen today but he's used his walker most of the time.   If it's pretty cool tomorrow may go in to get some feed for the babies and more Bute for Buck.    He is really enjoying his evening carrots.   Between Ray and Buck, we're going through carrots like they're going out of style. 

 

jfkoc - the sports just said OKC Thunder is bringing Fisher back.   Wish Harden would come back but guess he won't. 

 

Well, we're on the third round of this thread - guess we're all enjoying it - I know I am.   If we can't physically visit, at least we can do it this way. 

 

Everyone, hope you all have a quiet night.  Shirley, I'll be praying that things work out for Bill and he gets through this and back to his old self.   Take good care of yourself. 

 

 


Mama Sue
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 12:06 AM
Joined: 10/23/2012
Posts: 886


     Just catching up,  checking in and out.  

      Wishing all a quiet,  restful night.

                                   Susie


catlady
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 5:00 AM
Joined: 9/12/2012
Posts: 1267


Lorita,

It was me who has help coming in 5 days in the mornings so I can go to exercise class and do errands.  When I had to have someone come in, part of the decision=making was 3 days or 5.  I decided on 5 so that I could have the same person.  It's really made a difference. 

Now, I am going on an overnight trip with my 2 high school girlfriends.  I'm only going to be 20 blocks away so if it doesn't work out, I can be home really fast.  I'm using the same agency that gives me the daily caregiver.  Keep your fingers crossed that this works. 


Iris L.
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 5:34 AM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 17452


Lorita wrote:

 

She asked about a support group and I told her about all of you.  She wasn't aware there was a group like this online.    I told her it was the best ever! 

 

 

I've dealt with psychologists, social workers and geriatric care managers.  None of them were aware of these message boards.  I hesitated to make them aware of how valuable they are to me because I voice my opinion so much about professionals and how clueless, thoughtless, and ignorant they are.  I don't want to have to hold back on my impressions.

Iris L.

 



Johanna C.
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 7:33 AM
Joined: 12/9/2011
Posts: 11999


Oh my goodness; here we are - Volume Three in the set!  Can you just imagine?  And in the small amount of time this third volume has been up, there have been 170 people reading.  Wow - you really started something terrific when you first started this thread, Ms. Lorita!

 

Shirley, glad to see no further violence.  We hear your voiced ongoing difficulties.  You have some choices to make; never easy, but we are here to listen and support.

 

Thank you for saying goodnight and tucking us in, Mama Sue.  How is everything going this week?  No new speed bumps I hope.

 

This is such a lovely Thread, Volumes I thru III; I just wish that there were a way to keep them all together as there is SO much history in the first two and so much information.  It would make an amazing book, don't you think?  A microcosm of so many lives.  And the title is just perfect; "Just Need To Talk To My Friends."

 

Alzheimer's Assn. could get rights to put it together.  I think it would sell like hotcakes and the proceeds could be used for funding special caregiver programs.  Well; one can dream.

 

NOTE:  I will soon be making a change in my screen name for a variety of reasons, but you will know it's me, who else could it possibly be?  Grin.

 

Lorita, I did note that with the start of Volume III, it is now very easy to instantly start writing rather than that 20+ second wait.  Too bad that has to be; I would love to have it all together in one long thread so new folks could go back and read from the beginning as it is such an interesting thread.

 

AND . . . . have you noticed there is NEVER any contentiousness or pettiness here over the many, many months this thread has been in existence?  Everyone is respected and all is supportive to the max.  Never any negative writings no matter the subject - this is not always so on other threads and other forums. 

 

All of the folks on this thread have given of themselves in the true spirit of the supportive intention of this Message Board - thank you so much to all of you lovely people of both female and male persuasion; you are awesome and I am the better for knowing you, even if it is print.

 

Fondly,

 

Johanna C.


Lorita
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 8:28 AM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Good morning,

 

I tried to sleep in a little bit this morning but Phoebe had other ideas.  She kept pulling at the cover and touching my hand and face.   Guess she was hungry.   Anyway, I slept better and longer than usual. 

 

Thanks, Johanna, for the nice words about the thread.   I think it's awesome.  I look forward every day (several times) to checking in to see what's going on with all my friends.   It is kind of hard to find things that you kind of remember and would like to reread.   It is faster to get replies posted - much better. 

 

catlady, I asked about this because I was telling the social worker about it when she was telling me about resources.     Is this through the VA?   She mentioned one program called "Advantage" that sounds kind of similar but she said it differs from state to state.   One she mentioned to me was , I think, you could have someone come in four hours a day 30 times a year or about every two weeks.   All of the different programs are confusing.  Right now I don't feel I need any of them but I'm afraid the future will bring the need. 

 

I so hope you have a good weekend - that sounds like so  much fun.   I'm not in contact with any of my high school friends.  We had a very small class anyway.  My two best friends that I've known for  over 50 years live in a town about 25 miles from me so I don't get to see them much at all now.   We do talk on the phone occasionally but I do miss seeing them. 

 

Looks like it's going to be a pretty day - only about 90 which is great for Oklahoma in the summer.   Tonight, after midnight, we're supposed to have high winds and rain again.    I do hope we get more rain.   In the summer here we take every drop we can get.   My sister lives in OKC, as does jfkoc, and she complains about all the rain.    Guess it all depends on whether you live in town or in the country.    

 

Trying to decide about buying another TV.  I know we'll need one by winter because the room where we have one now doesn't have a heating stove.  Ray hasn't bothered this one so maybe he's over that phase except he does talk back to it, especially the weather or news.   Guess we could move this one but it has a small screen and a very big cabinet and is at least 25 years old.    catlady, what did you decide about a TV - you mentioned you thought you'd buy one for your anniversary. 

 

I saw Buck back in the lot.  He's been out grazing during the night and now guess he's ready for his Bute and a bit of feed.    

 

Going to finish watching Susan Graver on QVC, then feed the cats, check the girls and get Ray up and start our day.  Can't decide about going to town today.   Babies are probably close to the time they'll need more creep feed and we're almost out of carrots for Buck and Ray.   Can't have that. 

 

Hope everyone's day is good. 

 

 


Mama Sue
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 9:43 AM
Joined: 10/23/2012
Posts: 886


   Good morning Friends,


        We've been up since  5 AM.    I guess Leo had a bad dream.... he woke up thinking "some people were wanting to kill us,   to get rid of us."    

     I couldn't convince him we were safe,  or to come back to bed.   He insisted on getting dressed,   then roamed through the house looking in all the rooms.   Trying to find the "mean people" ?   Or trying to decide if we were at "Home"?   I don't know.   


  I started our normal routine early,  coffee,   feeding cats and dogs.   I always  

 have TV or  music on during the day to help me tolerate the ringing  and 

 hissing in my ears ( that's been going on since I had a small  stroke  14 years  ago.)   

     To comfort Leo  I  put in one of his favorite Bill Gaither Homecoming 

 DVDs.   News and weather always upsets him,  especially if they report a murder  or terrible accident   but the gospel music  completely engrosses him.

  Very soon he was saying I must have had a bad dream this morning.


  We've been busy all morning.  Only 9:30 AM  and I'm out of steam.  I don't think I have laid down for a nap since i was a child  but today I think I will.  Leo is sleeping in his chair but I  will try to wait till our helper comes at 11 AM.

      At least it's not too hot yet.   Good day to everyone.   Susie


jfkoc
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 10:11 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 20125


Good morning friends

I have been reading but not posting..."stuff" here has really been getting me down so I did not want to do much sharing.

Looking back I have been responsible for everything for 10+ years. Been through Dick's heart problems, prostate cancer, two hernia surgeries, knee replacement, diabetes, depression, sleep apnea, severe hearing loss, back problems, shoulder problems ....

 

Beside these problems I have to admit it was a difficult marriage. no abuse or anything like that. It just was a one sided relationship. Part of that I have concluded comes from the fact that Dick was an only child and his mother was ill and bedridden from the time that he was four until she died when he was 14. At that time he was sent to military school.

 

 Sometime over the the past few weeks I took a look back and a look forward. I guess that fact that I had some help coming in made me realize that I did not have anything to do. It was a real jolt to take an inventory and I have to admit that I did some grieving for for me as a person. Last weekend I spent in bed watching TV. Yep, the whole weekend. Maybe it was some sort of cleansing if that makes any sense.  Yesterday I did the same. Today I think I am ready to try to put a positive spin on what is in the past and give the old bootstraps a tug. 

I have and will continue to do my best for Dick but he is not going to get well he is not going to be happy. My pompoms are totally worn out, again. I do not have the where with all to get another set and do not think I can until I get my life back on track. 

Not talking about anything earth-shattering here but I want to do for "me" some.

Starters: Walked Sparky early this morning. Lorita, the humidity is a killer!!!

I am going to get back to using Lose It on the computer and get some of the weight off. I will drink more water. That is it for now. Little steps toward putting me back in the picture.

I know all of you understand...no crisis.... but a huge turning point.

Johanna....yes, we always be able to identify your posts..thanks for the FYI

 


Lorita
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 12:49 PM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Good afternoon,

Susie, I was up about 5 a.m. a day or two ago and "ran down" in the afternoon so had to take a nap.   Maybe you can catch one this afternoon and revive.

jfkoc - so strange that you'd post this morning.   I was thinking of you this morning when I was in the barn feeding cats, Buck and three cows who came in for a bite.   I realized I hadn't read a post on this thread from you in quite some time and decided the next time I posted I'd ask about how you are.

The humidity is high today but it is a little cooler - just a trade-off, I guess.

We're just watching the weather and it's already raining around Elk City.   Hope we get some more good rain tonight and tomorrow.  Weekend is supposed to be nice and they just said maybe another front Monday.

We've been busy all week with the Home Based Primary Care Team's visits and Ray's VA appointments.   Today, it's just us and I'm glad.   Ray's pedaling his bicycle now.  He was doing his sitting-marching and was about to drive me nuts so I told him to pedal - and he is.

What is this "Lose it" on the computer?   When the doctor told me I had osteoarthritis and a spur on my knee I thought I'd lose 25-30 lbs - maybe we can do it together!  Crackers are my downfall.   I can eat a whole sleeve if Iet  myself.   Easiest thing would be not to buy them, but...

I guess if most of us look back on our marriages, we'd find times that weren't so good.   I know I've been through those times, too.   Sometimes, like the other night, I just got kind of scared, I guess, thinking that Ray would be gone in a few years (if I don't go first) and then I'd be by myself.  My SIL lost her husband last Thanksgiving and she said there is such a difference being alone in your home even if your husband can't do anything or couldn't protect you if need be.   I don't know what I'll do - just hang on here, I guess.    I don't think I could make it in town - without the animals and the quiet.

Then, sometimes I wonder  - why do we struggle and do all these things just trying to survive and get by - what's the use.  You do dishes and they get dirty again, do laundry, it gets dirty again, etc.  It seems like we're always just doing things that we have to do over again.  We just do the same things over and over and as time goes by that gets harder and harder.    But, we keep doing it - just being human, I guess.

Pick  yourself up, dust yourself off, pull yourself up by those bootstraps and get back in there.   We're here for you and we've all been there.   Go glad to see your post - missed you and them. 

Go for  your walks with Sparky early.    Is he still a puppy and will get bigger?    Bella and Prince are such good friends - playing all the time.  Yesterday Prince got on the front porch (I try to keep them off) and a wasp stung his paw.   I know it hurt by the way he reacted but before long he was up and playing again.   Most of the time he lays on the small back porch we have.  I hear him bark pretty often - loud and gruff.  Usually he barks when he hears another dog somewhere or a wolf.  I hope when both of them get out of puppyhood, they'll turn out to be good watchdogs instead of playing all the time.

Tell me about "Lose it".  You find the most interesting things on the computer.   I'm still doing some jigsaw puzzles - drives me nuts sometimes.    Take care.

Johanna - I agree with jfkoc - we'll be able to recognize your posts.   I think yours is about the only ones that are longer than more but yours are so much more informative and interesting.   I love to read them.


Lorita
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 12:55 PM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Good afternoon, 

 

Susie, I was up about 5 a.m. a day or two ago and "ran down" in the afternoon so had to take a nap.   Maybe you can catch one this afternoon and revive. 

 

jfkoc - so strange that you'd post this morning.   I was thinking of you this morning when I was in the barn feeding cats, Buck and three cows who came in for a bite.   I realized I hadn't read a post on this thread from you in quite some time and decided the next time I posted I'd ask about how you are. 

 

The humidity is high today but it is a little cooler - just a trade-off, I guess. 

We're just watching the weather and it's already raining around Elk City.   Hope we get some more good rain tonight and tomorrow.  Weekend is supposed to be nice and they just said maybe another front Monday. 

 

We've been busy all week with the Home Based Primary Care Team's visits and Ray's VA appointments.   Today, it's just us and I'm glad.   Ray's pedaling his bicycle now.  He was doing his sitting-marching and was about to drive me nuts so I told him to pedal - and he is. 

 

What is this "Lose it" on the computer?   When the doctor told me I had osteoarthritis and a spur on my knee I thought I'd lose 25-30 lbs - maybe we can do it together!  Crackers are my downfall.   I can eat a whole sleeve if Iet  myself.   Easiest thing would be not to buy them, but... 

 

I guess if most of us look back on our marriages, we'd find times that weren't so good.   I know I've been through those times, too.   Sometimes, like the other night, I just got kind of scared, I guess, thinking that Ray would be gone in a few years (if I don't go first) and then I'd be by myself.  My SIL lost her husband last Thanksgiving and she said there is such a difference being alone in your home even if your husband can't do anything or couldn't protect you if need be.   I don't know what I'll do - just hang on here, I guess.    I don't think I could make it in town - without the animals and the quiet. 

 

Then, sometimes I wonder  - why do we struggle and do all these things just trying to survive and get by - what's the use.  You do dishes and they get dirty again, do laundry, it gets dirty again, etc.  It seems like we're always just doing things that we have to do over again.  We just do the same things over and over and as time goes by that gets harder and harder.    But, we keep doing it - just being human, I guess. 

 

Pick  yourself up, dust yourself off, pull yourself up by those bootstraps and get back in there.   We're here for you and we've all been there.   So glad to see your post - missed you and them.   

 

Go for  your walks with Sparky early.    Is he still a puppy and will get bigger?    Bella and Prince are such good friends - playing all the time.  Yesterday Prince got on the front porch (I try to keep them off) and a wasp stung his paw.   I know it hurt by the way he reacted but before long he was up and playing again.   Most of the time he lays on the small back porch we have.  I hear him bark pretty often - loud and gruff.  Usually he barks when he hears another dog somewhere or a wolf.  I hope when both of them get out of puppyhood, they'll turn out to be good watchdogs instead of playing all the time. 

 

Tell me about "Lose it".  You find the most interesting things on the computer.   I'm still doing some jigsaw puzzles - drives me nuts sometimes.    Take care. 

 

Johanna - I agree with jfkoc - we'll be able to recognize your posts.   I think yours is about the only ones that are longer than mine but yours are so much more informative and interesting.   I love to read them. 


silvertop
Posted: Thursday, July 25, 2013 3:20 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 669


It's amazing sometimes how many similarities we have all faced in long marriages.  With Jim it's been 3 knee replacements, two elbow prostheses (same elbow), fractured hip, total hip replacement, prostate cancer, macular degeneration, rheumatoid arthritis, central and obstructive sleep apnea, severe deafness - I may have missed something.  And he always thought he was in total control.  We made three cross country moves without even considering what I felt about moving.  I just realized the other night that I have never bought a car.  My dad picked out my first car, and Jim picked out every other car we've had in 47 years.  I've decided to get a new car, and I'm actually looking forward to the research and the dealing.  My daughter and son-in-law will also help me.  I'm currently driving a 13 year old Civic which still runs well, but if I don't get a new one, in the next few years, most of what we have may well go for Jim's care.  I'm also thinking I should move on the bedroom rugs.  He ripped up the old ones in 2005, and they are just scarred wood.

 

But I hate being totally responsible for everything.  If I didn't have my daughter and a good friend to discuss things with, I'd really feel alone.  Plus all of you.

 

I still haven't finished the application for the state VA home, but I will next week.  My out-of town son and family just arrived for a few days.  They came for the big family wedding tomorrow.  Jim and I aren't going.  Between the diapers, need to haul extra clothes, wheel him around - it's just too much.  The family totally understands, although I'll miss seeing all of them.

 

Time to check on the grandkids.  Talk soon.  Carolyn


Lorita
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 7:11 AM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Good morning, 

 

It's raining! - lightly.  I see OKC has had almost 3".  jfkoc, you all over there must be living right but I do know in town you don't want so much - at least  not like we need in the country.   This is a Godsend for western Okla and the Texas Panhandle.    Maybe we'll get more later. 

 

I left the gate open on the front porch so all three dogs are laying on the patio carpet I have out there.    

 

Nothing going on now except the light rain and I'm watching the news and/or QVC and having my morning juice. 

 

This is my mother's 98th birthday.  We lost her in 1996, just 13 months after daddy passed away.   Those two tragedies and my retirement all happened within 2 years - pretty hard time, except for the retirement. 

 

Ray is still asleep.  Barclee is having trouble with his ears- shaking his head a lot so will call the vet and ask him to send some of the medicine we've used for this before.   Seems like there's always something or someone that needs medicated. 

 

Going to be in the 70s today and a cooler weekend.   I'm surely ready for that.   I did see it's supposed to be 96 Thursday when Ray has a couple of appointments so I may reschedule them.   One is with the Podiatrist so I don't know for sure. 

 

I'll check in later after more people have posted and see what's going on with everyone. 


silvertop
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 8:51 AM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 669


My son and family are here this morning.  they will be gone before long to get ready and go to the family wedding.  We're just not talking about it in front of Jim and he has forgotten about it.  My son is very patient, spends time talking with his dad, and I appreciate that.   

 

Yesterday it took over 2 hours to get my other granddaughter's hair braided.  Here hair is curly, and I didn't realize how long it is.  She was very good until the very last.  Her braids are shoulder-long with pink beads.  So cute. 

 

Wednesday I had the baby. Jim looked at him and asked who he was.  The baby has been here several days a week since he came to us.  Then yesterday he asked our son who the other kids were - our nine and seven year old grandchildren.  It made me feel sad for him.  Carolyn 


catlady
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 1:08 PM
Joined: 9/12/2012
Posts: 1267


 

It is so good to hear from everyone. 

Lorita,

My DH was never in the service so we don't have any veteran's benefits. My caregiver stuff is all private pay.  If the television  I want is on sale next week, I'll go out and buy it.  I'm trying to decide if I want to pay for them to come out and hook it up.  It's either they do it or I do it and I really have no clue what I would be doing. 

jfkoc,

sounds like you have been doing so soul-searching which is a good thing!  I know sometimes I just want to find a quiet place and take a good look inside of me to see where I have been and where I am going. Our 42nd anniversary is Wednesday and I have been really down about it.  I think I feel like I have already lost my husband Right now I am going to lose some of those 30 pounds that I have gained since February.  I am a blob and I don't feel well about it.  I have a love-affair with food and I have to stop.  The diet my doctor recommended to me was the Paleo Diet.  It really works and is so simple.  You can google it.  It's basically eating like the cave women did---protein, vegetables (but not potatoes), and fruit.  You have to eat 3 meals a day.  No milk or sodas.  No bread.    jfkoc, if I can recommend something to do for yourself, try an exercise class.  I have made friends with other ladies there and we keep each other coming.  It's great for your mental and physical health.  I also try to do a little volunteering.  Helping someone else helps you, too. 

 

So....I went on my overnight trip with my girlfriends and, in all, it was good.  We were in a little log cabin that had two bedrooms and a loft.  I was so worried because I had no clue how Mike would do with another caregiver. I spent 30 minutes with her Thursday morning going over my 4 pages of notes ( I guess I have become OCD).  Around 2:00 p.m. she called because Mike would not take his medicine or eat anything.  I talked to him....most of what he said I couldn't  understand...then my words of wisdom to her were...don't push him.  If he won't take his pills...wait about an hour and try again.  If he won't eat, don't worry about it.  He'll eat dinner.  She seemed upset that he wouldn't do what she wanted him to do.  I worried but I knew I needed to let it be.  She called again about 8:00 because he was upset because one of the cats was not there.  I talked to him and told him the cat was at the vet's office getting bloodwork.  I would be him the next day bringing the cat with me.  I guess he was better....I couldn't tell because his language is getting so garbled.  She had said, after she let him alone in the afternoon, he slept and was a better person when he woke up.  No more calls that night so I guess no more emergencies.  Friday morning was beautiful--like a spring day and my friends and I walked to the beach.  11:00 a.m. came too soon and we had to check out.  I came home to Mike being sound asleep.  His being upset while I was gone was pretty much the same as when  his brother came to stay with him for 2 nights in March so I could "escape."  Is it worth it?  The jury's still out.  I think I have to have the break or continue being sane.  I wish I could get someone who would better understand Mike's personality.  You just can't push him. 

 

Shirley, how are things going today?  I worry about you!!!

 


jfkoc
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 2:10 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 20125


catlady....You can hook it up yourself...you connect the electricity and then the cable ...easy beezy.
Lorita
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 5:05 PM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Good afternoon, 

 

catlady, I agree with jfkoc.  If you have a TV that's already hooked up, look at how it's hooked up and do the same for the new one.   That's what I'm going to do.   The thing anymore is getting the darned thing programmed.   We don't have cable but have DirecTV - but they're really good to help you, too. 

 

What kind of television are you going to buy?   I've been looking at a 39" Vizio LED.  It's $358 online and $369 in the store.  ft has a very thin frame so will fit inside our cabinet.   The other 39" ones are a little bit too wide so we're kind of limited in what we get. 

 

I'm so glad you had a good time on your overnight trip with your friends.  I think it did you good.   Most time it's just a little break that we need. 

 

I can imagine that having to pay for someone to come in gets pretty expensive but if that's what helps preserve our sanity, it's worth it.

 

It's been kind of rainy here today.  Started sometime during the night.  The last time I looked at the rain gauge it was only .6" but that's good.    I got up early and watched some TV and dozed off in my chair.   The phone rang and I tried to answer it using the TV control until I realized what I was doing.   It was our vet who had come to pay us for the hay.  He was outside the yard.  I hurried and got my clothes on and went out and we had a nice, long visit.   I can't remember how many times he said "what  a nice morning".   He's a rancher as well as a vet and knows everything that's going on in the country so I learn  a lot when we visit.    He's finally gotten my vet bill figured so either in the morning or Monday we'll go pay it and get the pickup AC serviced and tires changed out.  I may not do all of the things at the same trip though since Ray got so tired the other day. 

 

Wouldn't it be great if we could all go to the same exercise class.   I've never been to one and I couldn't now probably because of my knee.   They have a yoga class at our local library - wish they had tai chi. 

 

jfkoc - how are you doing today?  I hope things are better.   I see you all got some more rain today.   Haven't talked with my sister but I know she's not happy about it.  She said the rain gutter over her garage is full of leaves, etc. and the water drips down on the garage door and makes it very heavy to open.    She has to sell that house and get moved into an apartment for hers, and my, sanity.   The woman from the cute apartments we saw the other day called yesterday 5 minutes after I'd left the house and hasn't called back. 

 

I just got up from a nap.  We watched Smokey and The Bandit this afternoon and enjoyed it and then decided to take a nap.   

 

catlady, let me know what kind of TV you're looking at.   I can't decide whether to buy one now or later. 

 

I'll check in again before bedtime.    Wonder how Bonnie's doing?   jfkoc, have you heard anything from her? 


Mwaegner
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 6:54 PM
Joined: 1/28/2013
Posts: 141


Lorita-  you mentioned not being able to do an excercise class.  We joined our local YWCA.  The have a class called Silver Sneakers and you just do what you can. Everyone has a chair and when the exercise is to stand up, if you can't you just do it sitting down.  There are people in wheel chairs, on oxygen etc and everyone just does what they feel like.  The best part is that our united health care supplemental  insurance pays the monthly fees.  There are many other cases and full use of the facility.  I highly recommend the Y to anyone
jfkoc
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 6:59 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 20125


I have not heard from Bonnie but was also wondering how she was.

I guess we had a lot of rain...the runoff is still running over our curb. You sister must be the only person who does not love the rain...we always need it.

Looks like you are getting some more. What a break to get the bales up/moved.

Sparky is a mess. He weighs 17 pounds and thinks he is the big dog on the block. He is a great watchdog. If getting him fixed does not quiet his passion to be outside I am bringing him to you. One thing cute is he talks...really. It is a riot.

 

 


Mama Sue
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 7:25 PM
Joined: 10/23/2012
Posts: 886


Greetings All !

     

              Remember me saying I might not post cause I'd be so busy arranging the STUFF in my house.    Well here I am ... procrastinating ???  Nah....just taking a break.   Made really good progress in the Guestroom.  It's my favorite room in the house....all lilac and moss green and girly.   Very peaceful.

 

    I used it when I had my Knee replacement so I could sprawl and not bump into Leo.   Sometimes I think I'd like to move in there again.... usually when the cat and the dog  both decide to sleep crosswise  between us ( queen size bed.)   But I know I would miss sleeping next to Leo and be afraid he would wake up and need me .  There would be 2 beds to make.


   Still,   I sure do like to sprawl and put pillows under my knees.  The rooms are not that far apart.   I could get a baby monitor  and leave the door open.

But then the dog and cat would follow me ...probably Leo too.  We'll see,

after my sis has come and gone  maybe I'll try it.   My clothes are already in the guestroom closet cause I had to give Leo mine after we put the new shower where his closet was.


 Catlady,    your overnight trip with your friends  was a good idea for respite for you but I know you can't really ever forget about what might be going on at home.   My girls sometimes have taken me out for lunch or shopping but it's never as good as we hope.  Either I try to make them understand what is happening to their Dad (they don't want to hear it.   He's always his sweet charming self when they visit.)  Or I will be so emotional that I cry ( they don't want to hear that either.  They are somewhat in denial)

     I hope your attempts at "a little time off for good behavior "  improves each time.


Carolyn,   I know how sad you feel when Jim can't remember the grandchildren.   I keep showing Leo the kid's pictures on the computer  and photo albums and reminiscing about times past,  hoping to keep the memories alive.   Still, after they visit,  he mostly says who was that guy or that girl,  or whose baby was that.  He cries and  grieves for our deceased son, Tim  but calls  his son Whatshisname.   It IS SAD.


  Lorita,  looks like Prince is a fixture on the farm now.   Was Bella spayed before you got her?   And have the neighbor, owners  still not come to check on Prince  or does he still go home occasionally ?  Please get us a picture before he is grown. LOL

I've been wanting to learn to add attachments.  Quits tried to instruct me but I didn't get it .  I'll try but if nothing comes through,  you'll  know I'm NOT smarter than a 5th grader.               Susie




File Attachment(s):
Tim.jpg (40922 bytes)

Mama Sue
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 7:55 PM
Joined: 10/23/2012
Posts: 886


   Hooray !!!   I did it .  That's  our son Tim,  who died at 44 ( heart attack ).  

  He was our only child together .  I had 3 daughters and Leo had 1 daughter,

  1 son  before we married.  They are all still living and we love them all but 

Tim was special to the whole family......OUR son,  the baby....he was the glue that blended our family,  a great Dad  and husband....a fine Christian man 

 with MANY,  MANY friends.


  I just chose his picture to see  if I could do it.   I'll see if I have  any of  Paco,  my Tuxedo cat or Pedro,  the   Doxie.   I know I have to buy printer ink before I can scan pics.  I don't know how to send pics from my dumb phone  ( as apposed to SMART phone ).   But I'll figure it out.   I've learned a lot  in the past few years.   I may be kicking and screaming,  but I'll get into the computer age of the 21st Century yet.


silvertop
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 8:34 PM
Joined: 12/15/2011
Posts: 669


Sue - How nice of you to post Tim's picture.  He was a handsome young man, And how much you must miss him.  I haven't yet got the hang of posting pictures here or on Facebook.  I'm proud of finally getting an avatar up! 

 

My daughter just posted pictures of my two granddaughters dancing at the wedding.  They are so cute.  One is 9 and her cousin is 4.  We just didn't talk about the wedding this week, and Jim has forgotten it.  He couldn't remember who the bride was anyway.  I do miss seeing all of the family, but it's nice to have our out-of-town son and family here, even for a few days.  My son is 45, has a head of very curly hair - now all gray like me!  Our daughter, a redhead, says, "No way am I going to be gray!"  I guess she is but she covers it well.  Our oldest son has Down Syndrome and just a few signs of gray. 

 

Jim and I use separate rooms.  He has always been a very loud snorer, so I gave up after the kids moved out.  Our two bedrooms have the master bath between them with a door into each room.  So I can still hear him at night - sometimes too well!  Today he has hardly been awake at all, even with everyone here.  He needs a shower and shave, but I'll nail him tomorrow since we're going to go out for an early dinner. 

 

Catlady - You have my 30 pounds!  Under stress I have always lost weight, but I'm at the point where my doctor is lecturing me about not losing any more.  The first 20 pounds I needed to lose; the last 10 not so much.  I think I literally forget to eat, especially lunches.  There always something I'm doing and I'll eat later - maybe.  I am trying to not lose any more.  Doesn't that sound ridiculous for someone my age? 

 

I think I'll make a big bowl of popcorn and watch trash TV.  Did I ever tell you guys that I live across the street from Abby of "Dance Moms"?  All I can say is that her mother is a lovely lady.  Good night all - Carolyn 


Lorita
Posted: Friday, July 26, 2013 10:38 PM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Hi everyone, 

 

Just enjoyed reading everyone's posts.    jfkoc - Sparky is the same weight as Barclee.   He's quiet most of the time now except when he wants to go outside during the night.   I'm thinking of getting some of those pads so I won't have to take him all the way outside in the middle of the night.  I miss him being like he used to be before he developed glaucoma.   He would run and play - could run so fast.  I know his former owner used to take him for walks because when we first got him he'd get his leash and bring it to us to take him for a walk.   I have to get Bella and Prince used to being on a leash so I can take them to the vet if I need to. 

 

The vet this morning told me how to train ai dog to work cattle.   There's some things you have to do but if they're herders it's inbred and it can't be taught.   He says Prince will be almost waist high and will probably eat three times what Bella will eat.    Oh, by the way jfkoc,  I'd take Sparky in a minute but I know you'd never give him up.   We get so attached to them so quickly. 

 

Susie - Bella was spayed before we got here.   The Shelter does all of that before they're placed.   I was supposed to take her back in two weeks for another shot but haven't gotten the chance yet. 

 

No, the neighbors have never come to check to see if Prince might be here.   I also haven't seen Lance, the Lab, in quite some time.   The vet says sometimes dogs will "place" other dogs they don't want around.   I guess that's what Lance did with Prince. 

 

I'd love to post a picture of him and Bella and a few others but I just can't get the hang of it.   Maybe you can give me step by step directions.   Others have and I just must miss a step.   I'm like Carolyn, I was thrilled to get an avatar up. 

 

The picture of Tim is so good- he was so handsome and I do know you miss him so much.    

 

We had under l" of rain today but it seems muddy.  Guess the ground was pretty wet anyway and the water hasn't soaked in yet.    Buck is down in the meadow.   I'll let the girls down in a few days to graze the fresh, new grass and not bale another cutting of hay this year.   We have much more than we need - probably enough for next year if nothing serious happens. 

 

Ray has been good today - his blood sugars have been down and he's enjoyed watching TV along with a nap.  May run into town in the morning while the weather is cool.   I can take another month of this weather - so unusual for Oklahoma in the summer. 

 

I just tried to attach a picture of Bella and Prince and it said it was too large.  Now what?   I went through this before and tried to resize it but it neve worked. Maybe I'll look up the old instructions if I can find them and try to resize it again.   Do any of you all have this trouble?

 

Everyone have a good night and rest well.


Marjorie McCarthy
Posted: Saturday, July 27, 2013 8:25 AM
Joined: 12/20/2011
Posts: 556


The sheep farmer down the road uses this pasture once a year. He calls these dogs Great Pyrenese not in my book. The GP's I know are huge, these must be from a different country.

 

Does Prince look like this  Lorita?

 

The fenced in area is my Poodle Yard, LOL. Needless to say they do not play in it when the dogs are there.

I have edited this to say, the pic does not show my poodle yard, I thought it did.


File Attachment(s):
GP.jpg (63718 bytes)

Marjorie McCarthy
Posted: Saturday, July 27, 2013 8:29 AM
Joined: 12/20/2011
Posts: 556


Lorita, I can resize your pic if you send it to me by email, my address is cloudspn@twcny.rr.com

They want the pic so small it's hard to see.


Marjorie McCarthy
Posted: Saturday, July 27, 2013 8:34 AM
Joined: 12/20/2011
Posts: 556


This is a link for the AKC Great Pyrenees.

<<http://www.akc.org/breeds/great_pyrenees/photos.cfm>>


catlady
Posted: Saturday, July 27, 2013 8:39 AM
Joined: 9/12/2012
Posts: 1267


Lorita,

I'm thinking about getting a 46" Insignia which is the store brand for Best Buy.  I think what had me freaking out was that Mike has our current TV hooked up to a VCR and a Home Theatre system.  But,,,you know, I don't think I need to keep the VCR or the Home Theatre stuff (we don't use it anyway).  So, I should be able to hook it up to the cable box and maybe get a DVD player.  All I will need to do is put on my big girl panties and get it done!

 

Our anniversary is Wednesday and I still haven't decided how to celebrate.  I was feeling all sad last week.  Today, I have a better attitude about it. 

 

They make DVD's of Tai Chi or yoga so you could try it out at home.  If you really want to rock, order a set of Zumba discs from QVC!!!


catlady
Posted: Saturday, July 27, 2013 8:41 AM
Joined: 9/12/2012
Posts: 1267


just thought of another idea.....if you have a library close by, you could check out some discs to try out before you purchase any.
MomxTwo
Posted: Saturday, July 27, 2013 9:07 AM
Joined: 11/11/2012
Posts: 3


Catlady, I don't usually post but, I saw your concern about hooking up your new tv and thought I would share my helpful hint.  I take a digital photo of the back of my old tv and all of the hook ups and then load it onto my computer.  Then, when it comes time to hook up the new tv, I use the photo as my guide.  It makes it much easier and you don't have to try and remember where everything goes. Best of luck.

Susan


Lorita
Posted: Saturday, July 27, 2013 11:39 AM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Good morning,

 

Marjorie, Prince doesn't look exactly like the picture you sent but he does look like the link about the GPs except he's not as big as the one at the top, yet.   Our vet says he'll be almost waist high.   I just read last night that the St. Bernard and GPs are related.   We had a St. Bernard once, Hutch, and he was beautiful.   Ray went to the store/gas station and someone was there and gave him to him.   They lived in a small travel trailor and had to keep him inside.    We had one poodle at that time and when she saw him, she actually screamed.   Guess she had never seen a dog that big.    Hutch was a good watch dog. 

 

catlady - they have a Zumba class down at our local library but right now my knee wouldn't take it.  Years ago they had a series of classes on TV on Tai Chi and I recorded them.   I did them as they showed the classes and I don't think I've ever been as sore in my life.   As slow and easy as it looks you wouldn't think you'd get sore. 

 

We had a VCR hooked up to our HD receiver but I forgot how to use it since we have DirecTV and so just quit using it.    I don't even think I'll get a DVR but could through DirecTV.   If I recorded something, I'd probably never get around to watching it.   When we worked, I recorded things every day and we'd watch them at night. 

 

Wow - a 46" - that would be great.  There is a Best Buy in Muskogee but I've checked on line and didn't see a good buy on a 39".  Our cable comes in close to a corner in the living room so there really isn't a wall we could put a bigger on and sure couldn't get it in the cabinet.  I know they do have those wall hangers that rotate so that might work but I don't know who I'd get to put it up.    Are you going to hang yours on the wall? 

 

jfkoc - talk about humid!   It's much cooler but the humidity is higher and that gets you almost as quickly as heat.  Our vet said he had had seven dogs to treat that had heat stroke.   He said the people keep them in the house under AC during the day, then come home from work and let them outside and leave them too long.  He had one that was chained to a tree - or under a tree - but he got too hot and they found him laying out in the hot sun.   He said they get disoriented and don't know what to do.   

 

Just came in from bringing Buck back to the house from the meadow.   He's walking pretty well and seems to be gaining some weight.  The cows are beginning to want into the meadow - nice green grass without any tall, dry fescue in it.    Guess I'll let them in some time next week. 

 

We're watching Rawhide this morning.  They were made the year I graduated from high school - over half a century ago.   Talk about something making you feel old! 

 

Shirley - how's Bill doing? and, most of all, how are  you doing?   I hope things are going all right with you.    

 

Guess we'll watch more westerns this afternoon.  Not in the mood to go to town.   You know, I could get another TV cabinet - but then, what would I do with the old one?    Too many decisions.


ligantim
Posted: Saturday, July 27, 2013 3:18 PM
Joined: 3/14/2013
Posts: 692


 

Good afternoon to all.

 

The temperature is much cooler today but the humidity is awful.  I had two  wonderful Christian men knock on my door around 9 this morning.  I was sweating buckets just showing them what needed done.  One was here to replace the rotten wood on the cornice of the house so we can paint it.  The other one mowed our yard.  It was so nice to know we are loved in such a practical way.

 

My DH had a hard time with them working on his house.  34 years ago my DH, his brother and I built this house.  We subbed out the brickwork.  But the rest was our labor of love.  DH has done all the upkeep on it.  Today he realized he could no longer discern the process of how to do the repairs.  I have been noticing that anything that requires a process of steps is becoming almost impossible for him.  He has been sad most of the day and has kind of a lost look on his face.  In turn that makes me a bit sad too.

 

Buying and planting the tomato plants for him to take care of has been a great thing.  He is watering it almost everyday.  It has several blooms on it and two tomatoes.  I expected to have to add taking care of it to my plate, but he has really surprised me.  I am thankful it is bringing him pleasure.

 

For many years we had a small rat terrior dog.  She was an amazing watch dog.  Every time someone pulled into the driveway she started her yippy bark.  It was funny to see big adult men take a step back from our door because of her.  We have not gotten another dog of any kind since she pass on. 

 

Lorita and catlady, I hope you find just the TV you.  I bought a new one about five years ago.  We bought it from Best Buy.  We have really enjoyed it.  Right now we are on cable but not sure we are going to stay there.  It is getting rather expensive. We were also limited in size because it had to fit into the existing cabinet.

 

Have a good afternoon.  Until later....

 

 


Lorita
Posted: Saturday, July 27, 2013 11:21 PM
Joined: 12/18/2011
Posts: 13381


Good evening, 

 

We're about ready for bed even though we took an afternoon nap.   Ray got up early this morning so he's already gone to bed. 

 

I decided today I'd see if Prince, the Great Pyrenees, would walk with a leash.  He has a collar on.   I guess they may have been teaching him because he does all right.   I was really relieved about that.   I'll work with him every day.   Now,Bella is another thing.   She isn't used to it at all.  I have to get a collar for her and then I'll start with her.    Both of them went with me to the mailbox - I drove the Chuck Wagon.   It's 1/2 mile round trip and Prince seems to get so hot but I couldn't get him to get in to ride with me.   The noise probably scares me.  I'll keep trying. 

 

It's been fairly cool here today but very humid so I stayed in most of the day.  I think it would be wonderful to live where it was cool and the humidity was low.   I always imagine that's how it is up north.   Cynthia, is the humidity high where you live?    

 

Hope everyone rests well tonight and tomorrow is good.   I'll look forward to seeing what's going on with all of you in the morning. 


 
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