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In my deep, deep sleep.
Jim Broede
Posted: Saturday, July 15, 2017 10:57 AM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 4759

I have dedicated a great part of my life. To pondering. About the absurdity of life. I do this. Because that is what I was born to do. It’s my creator-given mission. Of course, I also take time off. And try to ponder not at all. To cease thinking. About anything. Maybe that is why I have been blessed with sleep. Moments of unconsciousness. But even then, I can’t fully escape. I lapse Into the consciousness of dreams. Though I can’t always tell that it’s me. Dreaming. It may be someone else. Taking control of my mind.  Sending me a message. That I often don’t understand. Perhaps I was born. To imagine. That I’m living. When really, I’m dead. Yes. Yes. I am blessed by my creator.  Who allows me to imagine. That I am very much alive. Whenever the urge emerges. In my deep, deep sleep. --Jim


Jim Broede
Posted: Saturday, July 15, 2017 11:06 AM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 4759

I keep telling myself. That I am not crazy. That I am delighted with the absurdity of life. Maybe that's an indication. That I am crazy. In a funny, laughable and delightful way. I'll take it. And pretend that I am sane. Might as well savor it all. -Jim
Posted: Saturday, July 15, 2017 10:17 PM
Joined: 2/24/2016
Posts: 1096

Jim, I like that you keep telling yourself that your not crazy.  So do I, lol.  

When I was younger, I asked my therapist if he thought I was normal.  He said, you know I don't think there is such a thing as normal.  He said, the key is learning what society says is acceptable and make sure you do that in public and you won't be thought of as abnormal.  Also of course he added that as long as you do that and aren't hurting yourself or anyone else, your doing good.  Best therapist I ever had!

Posted: Sunday, July 16, 2017 2:36 AM
Joined: 1/23/2017
Posts: 935

I have no set rule when I come here as to what I read first. Today, it was Musings, then Caregivers, and then Younger Onset. There's a thread up there, Jim, started by Alz+, and called ," a fantasy future doesn't have to come true. "  You really should take a look at  it. After reading to the bottom, I looked around at all the junk we have here. I have no doubt now. It ain't the PWD's who have sanity issues. It's me !
Posted: Sunday, July 16, 2017 11:50 AM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 14754

I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

    —Umberto Eco (1932- )
    perhaps we are just the reality of "someone's/something's" thinking.
    What do you think about Plato's cave? I found the allegory very helpful to me as a caregiver.

Jim Broede
Posted: Monday, July 17, 2017 5:49 AM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 4759

I recognize, jfkoc, that I am living in the shadows. And the only way to see beyond. Is to use my blessed imagination. To follow my instincts. Knowing that once I flee the physical world (Plato’s Cave). I will become spirit. Thereby freeing myself. To explore the entirety of physical creation. As an observer. From above.  But even then, there will be something beyond the beyond. Always another beyond. Which will keep me in pleasurable awe. Forever and ever. Always searching for the end of the rainbow. And never quite finding it. For good reason. That would be the end of my journey. The end of life. And I prefer remaining on the journey. And even getting purposely lost. So that I can sidetrack. To a new place. Always feeling more and more alive. That’s the joy. To experience the life force. To continually fall in love. With ever-changing reality. Not knowing what’s to come next.  Wow! Wow! Wow! Give me more of life. --Jim


Posted: Monday, July 17, 2017 8:02 AM
Joined: 5/21/2016
Posts: 1594

Very interesting thread -- reason why I go to musings first.
Jim Broede
Posted: Thursday, July 20, 2017 12:28 PM
Joined: 12/22/2011
Posts: 4759

Could be. That it’s natural. To get tired of living. In the physical realm, that is. I Imagine that it can be a burden. Punishment, of sorts. Full of physical, mental and emotional anguish. Though I haven’t reached that point. And don’t want to. But hey, I wonder if Methuselah ever thought of cashing in his chips. Maybe at the halfway point, around  his 500th birthday.  Rather than choosing to push on for what must have seemed like an eternity. Did he have to endure painful arthritis? Or did he remain physically fit for his entire life? Without the slightest indication of dementia. Or heart disease. Of course, it could be that Methuselah was a mere myth.  The figment of a storyteller’s wild imagination.  Anyway, I wouldn’t mind putting it all to a test. By becoming a modern-day Methuselah. Being recorded. Documented. To provide undeniable proof for future generations. Thing is. If Methuselah actually did ever reside here on Earth, he might still be alive. In the spiritual realm. If I ever get there myself –well, it would be a pleasure to interview Methuselah. To satisfy my boundless curiosity.  --Jim


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