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Spouse or Partner Caregiver Forum
My current experience with my DH has become so complicated that I'm not even sure how to post about it - will probably do so in pieces. But I just wanted you to know that we all care about you and your husband.
Take care of yourself, too,
No advice. Just sympathy. Sounds about like me and DH. He is in skilled nursing right now Thinks he is perfectly able to go home and doesn't know why I put him there and why I am keeping him there. I told him to talk to the doctor about it and he insists he never sees the doctor. It is ME that wants him there. He is also diabetic and they take good care of that and his meds. And no, right now I am not able to take care of all of that. He thinks we should get full time help and live at home. When I told him, that would be about $20,000 per month. He says I am lying to him and all we would need is someone to come in once or twice a day.
It goes on and on just like this post. Bobbie
You know, Bobbie, you're right - I immediately saw that the skilled nursing facility did a much better job than I could with my husband's diabetes care. That kind of good chronic health care is also something to consider as a positive.
I understand what you are saying.
Dear KrosKow Is privacy a concern for your LO? In what way would moving him be beneficial to you? In what ways would it be "better"?
The placement you have achieved sounds like it works excellently well! Sounds like they did a fine job during the recent emergency and treated YOU like family (and your dogs!) You specifically commented on times when LO felt comfortable there.
For the times LO feels like a captive, does the facility make a difference?
One of the best suggestions offered here regularly: remember, as much a humanly possible, exude positivity.
I have that 'truth telling' hang-up and replies can be a challenge "I'm sorry you feel that way. You are with me always in my heart... Let's talk to the Doctor and see what the medical strategy/situation/decision can tell us...."
No point, that I can discern for trying to dissuade LO from running away... PWD gonna do what PWD gonna do....
I am so grateful for the questions and answers that people bring to these boards!! The care and affection I feel for us and our families makes me, personally, feel closer to God in an intimate and affirming way. So, thank you and best wishes for your continued success! peace-out, Angel
Angel_Wolf, you have no idea how much clarity you've given me with your questions and comments. Privacy is less an issue to DH than to me. He sometimes complains that he'd like room for his lounge chair and a few other things, but moving him to a larger, or private room where he is would accommodate that. And it had not occurred to me that when he is adamant about coming home, being in a different facility won't change his mind. The staff where he is now are good people who genuinely care about him and I trust them to do what is best for him. I think my guilt about not bringing him home was pushing me to "pretty" up the situation so I would feel better, without really impacting him in a beneficial way. Thank you for opening my eyes so I can make the right decisions for the right reasons.