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I Have Alzheimer’s or Another Dementia
Cancelling social commitments
I've been diagnosed with MCI for a couple of years now. I'm staying pretty static as far as progression goes but lately I have a a propensity to back off from commitments I've made to others.An example:I volunteer at a local hospital to be greeter at the main entrance. A couple of times now I just didn't show up....like today. I feel very guilty, and rightfully so. I'll later call and apologize. My coordinator there is aware of my MCI and is very understanding but I still feel guilty.
To get to the point, I wonder if this behavior is connected at all to MCI or am I just looking for a scapegoat.
Thanks for reading.
Welcome, Fred. I feel overwhelmed at times by committments, but usually I am able to attend. I try to avoid committments that make too many demands. I think I would like to be a greeter at a hospital. Are you getting enough sleep?
Welcome to our group. We're so glad you found us.
Hopefully you have the type of MCI that does not progress, or does so very slowly.
Socialization, such as you get as a greeter, is important. Only you can decide what is too uch. Do you need to cut down on how often you sign up for?
I don't know you but would hope you do show up for what you signed up for. or at least, try calling before you are due, so they know you won't be there.
Thanks for the responses.
Actually I did call the volunteer coordinator and apologized. We had a good conversation and it resulted in my taking a respite for a week or two. There are issues at home to get resolved first. She told me that there are other volunteer positions that she thinks would be more to my liking. I greatly appreciate her patience and understanding.
Onward and Upward!
Perhaps you can be more selective in your social commitments? Being socially active is one of the components of what several of us PWD call Best Practices. It is important that we intefact with other folks on a daily basis. This lack in my own life, plus my fraility led to my current residence in an ALF.
If it’s okay for a caregiver/spouse to comment, my husband had MCI for a number of years. He did exactly what the poster is doing. He said he feared being “found out” and judged by others who once knew him as “smart.” I understood his trepidation, as I’ve thought those with MCI or AD are often prejudged without giving them any opportunities beforehand.
Our local chapter offers a social group for those with earlier stage AD or MCI and a spouse or friend where everyone feels safe to be themselves. Maybe your chapter has something along those lines where you can do some trial runs. Best of luck.
Welcome Hilde. I too, have had a diagnosis of cognitive impairment not otherwise specified since December 2008. I have other medical diagnoses, including systemic lupus, hypertension, and sleep apnea. I have learned what to do for myself from the members here. The first step was following Best Practices, which are lifestyle habits that improve functioning and may prolong the early stages. In my case, Best Practices has been beneficial.
I also learned about dealing with anxiety, which paralyzed me for some time. Alan in Colorado, one of our emeritus members, who was himself a psychologist, told us that stress and anxiety reduce our cognition by half. We have to learn to use whatever stress-reduction methods we have to calm and strengthen ourselves. In my own case, I used deep breathing. Many medications used as anxiolytics actually worsen memory and cognition.
I hope you keep posting. Feel free to begin your own thread by clicking on "Add Topic" on the main I Have Alzheimer's page, then follow the prompts.
I know exactly what you are saying. It is hard for me to
attend social events, even those involving family. I think
it may have to do with my problems with communication
and continued fear of rejection by people. I have lost a lot
of friends due to my Alzheimer’s. There are a lot of family
members who also don’t talk to me. You are not alone!
First of all, welcome! I am new to the sight as well, but have met some REALLY cool people. We all seem to have so much in common. Floating on a cloud, nix on stores and restuarants, close friends and family only, anxiety, depression, transitioning to new locations to live, fear of the future and on and on.
The great thing about this sight is sharing, supporting, encouraging, educating and listening.