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Should I move my Sister
Posted: Tuesday, January 8, 2019 7:29 PM
Joined: 1/8/2019
Posts: 2

My younger sister was diagnosed with EOAD when she was 64 although I think it had been going on for a few years prior to that (she is 69 now).  She actually stopped driving since the doctor suggested it to her.  My problem is that she has been living in Florida with her significant other for 15 years.  She is now in a memory care facility there.  I would say she is at stage 5/6.  My communications with her over the phone are always sad and her wanting to get out of there.  I live in Pennsylvania. I decided to go visit her a few weeks ago and spent several days immersed in her life, eating every meal together and even sleeping in her room.  Much of the time she spent crying and wanting to die.  It broke my heart.  On top of that, she is also having delusions that the staff is hitting her and does not like her....I don't think that is the case from what I could see.  The staff tells me that generally she is in good spirits and that they do not see her crying or carrying on.  I am totally frustrated trying to figure out whether to move her to another facility here in PA or whether she will do the same when she gets here.  I might add that she has no other family in Florida so it is only Steve visiting her perhaps twice per week.  If I move her here she will have more family visiting with her.  I really think she feels lonely and abandoned.  I know moving her would be disruptive for a while however I believe in the long run she would be happier with family making short visits on a daily basis.  Anyone experiencing this situation? Is it just one of the phases and it will eventually stop and she will settle in.  She has been there almost 4 months already.  She was seen recently by the nurse practioner/psycologist who is adjusting her thyroid medication. She said that could be a factor in her mood.   She does not want to change her anti-depression meds at this time.  I keep hearing it is "the disease" speaking.  I just don't know what to do.
Mimi S.
Posted: Tuesday, January 8, 2019 8:10 PM
Joined: 11/29/2011
Posts: 6768

Welcome to out world Catladyrose. I'm so glad you found our site.

Who has the DPOA?  Is the SO the Steve you mention?

What has her current residence done to get her involved in activities? How will that differ from in the new place? 

Posted: Wednesday, January 9, 2019 7:47 AM
Joined: 1/8/2019
Posts: 2

Hi Mimi,

It is my sister Carol that has the EOAD and Steve is her SO.  The facility does have daily activities. 

I am planning another trip to see her the end of January and plan to observe her from a distance since she seems to react to my presence.  The facility is telling me one thing and she is telling me another.  I agree, I am not at all sure that moving her to another facility will make her happier but I do know that she will have more family visiting with her here in PA.   Perhaps there is no place on earth that will give her any peace at this juncture.  

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