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Toilet paper woes
Daisylost
Posted: Monday, April 29, 2019 11:30 PM
Joined: 5/12/2018
Posts: 54


Mom is an amazing 84 yr old late onset.  Problem right now is toilet and need for paper.  She wants to keep wiping and shoving paper in her pamp and then MUCH of into toilet, to the point of flooding.  

I now limit paper.  This is not 2 or 3 squares, I place 3 or 4 bundles with 4-6 squares in each bundle.  

Sometimes she's okay with it, sometimes she's outspoken upset about it and then sometimes when the toilet is flooding I see napkins from dinner table or kitchen in pot.  : ( :O YIKES

I can't keep the flooding up.  I can't afford the plumbing.  I do not want to clean this anymore.  I do not want her to be angry at me and stressed over this but I JUST cannot give her the whole role anymore. 

ANY IDEAS?  Sigh.  


Livesbythebeach
Posted: Tuesday, April 30, 2019 5:24 AM
Joined: 4/3/2019
Posts: 82


Yikes is right.  My mother is OBSESSED with toilet paper too. 

If your mom isn't particular about the brand, try getting one which is thinner and which will flush more easily.  If she's putting other paper in the toilet- which is so bad for plumbing- can you remove all other paper products from the home- ie paper towels, dinner napkins, etc?  And maybe visit a hardware store to find out if there's some sort of product you could put in the bowl to break down paper? 

 


SunnyBeBe
Posted: Tuesday, April 30, 2019 3:57 PM
Joined: 10/9/2014
Posts: 569


It sounds like she's not able to manage toileting on her own or even to have access to the toilet alone.  She certainly wouldn't be doing this if she had the ability to stop.  I'd ensure that she never goes to the restroom alone and that the only paper she gets is provided directly to her by you or whoever is supervising her bathroom trips. In fact, there's really no reason that she should have access to the bathroom without being supervised. 

 And, to keep her hands busy, you might check out some fidget boards. They are available at some of the online stores for disabled/dementia care needs. 


Jillgap
Posted: Tuesday, April 30, 2019 4:17 PM
Joined: 3/2/2019
Posts: 1


Oh my, this has become a problem in our home too.  My DH overflows the commode weekly.  I  am at a loss.  I've tried being vigilant but, its not always easy.   Today I saw him throw q-tips into the toilet and flush. It has become a challenge for sure.

I will try the thinner paper and limited supply. 


jfkoc
Posted: Tuesday, April 30, 2019 6:13 PM
Joined: 12/4/2011
Posts: 16761


I remember...ugh!
zauberflote
Posted: Tuesday, April 30, 2019 9:48 PM
Joined: 10/24/2018
Posts: 139


I'm having this odd sense of déja vu all over again. I think we had a childproof toilet lock when the kids were little. Maybe. This could guarantee nothing in the toilet.
Abuela
Posted: Tuesday, April 30, 2019 10:02 PM
Joined: 6/24/2012
Posts: 291


My mom is putting her toilet paper everywhere except the toilet!  In her drawers, on her dresser tops, the counter... sigh.  

 


dw743
Posted: Wednesday, May 1, 2019 12:30 AM
Joined: 11/13/2018
Posts: 64


I think there is plenty of us here with the same problems. Just got DW to bed. She was pulling TP of the roll and making big piles. It's what our cat did a couple of times. Yep, some ended in the depends. And when she did wipe, the used stuff goes other places except the toilet.

 Where else can a bunch of "strangers"go and tell these events to others. Thanks for this forum and all who share their stories to us.

I think I see light at the end of a tunnel, hope it's not the train.

DW goes into MC tomorrow. Spend the day with friends getting her room all ready for her. Following the MC checklist, there is a lot of stuff being moved in. I just hope the move goes good for her.

When I realize this the last night she will spend in our home of 40 years, that sure wets the eyes.

But trying to stay as positive as one can with our plight, the TP problem is now in their court.


Golondrina
Posted: Wednesday, May 1, 2019 1:07 AM
Joined: 4/19/2018
Posts: 36


My mom uses toilet paper for everything her nose,her bathroom,her meals every time she she needs to wash her hands . She refuses to use paper towels or napkins only toilet paper 

 


cdolan70
Posted: Wednesday, May 1, 2019 8:13 AM
Joined: 4/1/2014
Posts: 23


We ran into this problem too. Except my mom loved flushing banana peels down the toilet too.  We bought a child-proof lock for the toilet handle so at least I could see what was in there before it got flushed.  Saved us a lot of plunging.
Fischie7
Posted: Wednesday, May 1, 2019 9:07 AM
Joined: 7/27/2016
Posts: 153


My DH was using paper towels and baby wipes to clean himself and then flushing.  Also from time to time "helped" me by cleaning the litter pan and dumping the clumps of litter (like cement) in the toilet.  We had a clogged toilet and a clogged sewer line with waste coming up in the basement laundry sink!!! This happened 3 times...after $3000, I removed all paper towels (I hide them in my closet) and baby wipes (also hidden) and dole out the toilet paper.  I hung signs up around the toilet that said "Do not throw paper towels in the toilet" Haha...now my DH wants to throw the toilet paper in the waste basket becuse of the signs....
zauberflote
Posted: Wednesday, May 1, 2019 9:29 AM
Joined: 10/24/2018
Posts: 139


Oh right- forgot to mention! Last few months I've been finding Mom's used TP all over her room, in walker bag where she no doubt then blows nose with it, haven't checked dresser drawers yet. Used tissues the same, she knows they "go" someplace, and tidily disposes of them wherever seems right at that moment. The ball ought to be in MC's court as mentioned above, but I guess to them a room snowed under with crumpled white paper is acceptable. Maybe Mom is the only one living there who has bodily functions still mostly under her control (well except that faucet of a nose!).
Carolyn613
Posted: Wednesday, May 1, 2019 12:14 PM
Joined: 7/15/2016
Posts: 1038


A friend of mine had his mother living with him and his wife, with caregivers coming into the home. Both husband and wife worked full time. He said that his mother developed a problem with putting too much TP into the toilet, so he began simply turning off the water to the toilet during the day. Then, when he was home, he would take care of what was in there - don't ask me how; he didn't say, and I didn't ask - so no flooding.

  

My parents' next door neighbor sold his home after he retired, and the home was turned into a an assisted living group home. After a while my mother (my father had died by this time) began having plumbing problems. Raw sewage was backing into her basement. The water people discovered some sort of breach in the pipes under the property, and a clog of newspapers. They probably had gotten into a storm sewer somewhere and drifted down how many miles till they collected under my parents' yard. But my mother was convinced that the people with dementia next door must have been using newspapers instead of TP, and flushing them down the toilets. Of course, I am sure that that is not what was happening.



Ed1937
Posted: Wednesday, May 1, 2019 12:56 PM
Joined: 4/2/2018
Posts: 1100


Carolyn613 wrote:

so he began simply turning off the water to the toilet during the day. Then, when he was home, he would take care of what was in there - don't ask me how; he didn't say, and I didn't ask - so no flooding.

That's an easy solution. There should be a shutoff valve on the water supply line. It (the valve) will be located near the floor. Just turn it off, then back on when needed. When you turn it off, there should be enough water in the tank for another flush before it won't flush again.

 




phoenixjs
Posted: Thursday, May 2, 2019 12:07 PM
Joined: 4/29/2016
Posts: 15


My better has a thing with toilet paper as well.  He reuses is and leaves it all over the place.  I have tried different brands because some are more fluffy than others.  He also doesn't always flush the toilet and leaves the water running in the sink.  When I go to his room at memory care, there is always crumpled and torn paper everywhere.
Daisylost
Posted: Friday, May 3, 2019 12:46 AM
Joined: 5/12/2018
Posts: 54


LOL @ Yikes, I'm happyy you agree! We use Angel Soft because it's septic safe and though they make the double rolls OMG Never do I buy those anymore just seeing them is alarming haha :{
Daisylost
Posted: Friday, May 3, 2019 1:25 AM
Joined: 5/12/2018
Posts: 54


SunnyBeBe wrote:

It sounds like she's not able to manage toileting on her own or even to have access to the toilet alone.  She certainly wouldn't be doing this if she had the ability to stop.  I'd ensure that she never goes to the restroom alone and that the only paper she gets is provided directly to her by you or whoever is supervising her bathroom trips. In fact, there's really no reason that she should have access to the bathroom without being supervised. 

 And, to keep her hands busy, you might check out some fidget boards. They are available at some of the online stores for disabled/dementia care needs. 

SunnyBeBe, your reply was strongest for me, both in tone and in content.  Funny how tone comes out in writing ^^.  Was I just scolded? ^  
I am aware that she needs to be accompanied now.  I am so fortunate that mom is still walking and moves about quickly sometimes.  I can be in toilet myself, or at laundry room or making a meal or half a dozen other things and not see her go into her bathroom.  : ( Thus I'm limiting the paper available there when she does go).  I have the baby monitor and I do hear most times that she gets up but meh. NOT every single time.  I am so happy that mom can still go to bathroom and I'm just trying to make it easier for both us us (****ME) that there is no flooding or anymore yuck problems.  Thus I asked for suggestions. Thank you 
xx D

Daisylost
Posted: Friday, May 3, 2019 1:54 AM
Joined: 5/12/2018
Posts: 54


Jillgap re the over-flooding of Toilet meh.. There was someone who posted not too long ago regarding her mother passing and no longer feeling vigilant. THis is the new me, uber vigilant but mom still mobile.  I'm so happy she is and yet it's frightening.  

Zauberflote, I'm looking into the toilet lock but might just turn the water off.. 

CDolan @ toilet lock

Abuela, that paper doesnt just stay in bathroom, it's in the bedroom under the pillows, in her bed, in drawers, and lol, someone said in her walker pocket, there too! What is it with paper??

DW743 You are absolutely right I love this forum for that reason who else would understand?? Bless You and your LO, I hope the transition is good.  xx 

Golondrina, I have a funny strange memory or old ppl fam friends with a roll of TP at table hhhaa. ^^ 

Fischie7 This is why I love the forum, some things are new and some are tried. TY I did the signs, they worked for a while then mom said Those are for ppl who come to visit, not me lol ..BUt I had them up for a good while! 

Carolyn613, Next step is water shut off at her bathroom.  

Thank you to all who replied.  Every ones journey is different and sometimes so alike.  I just wanted some feedback.  Some help.  Sometimes I feel so out of it and like no one else is even imagining what is going on and asking for help is key, what have you done, what did you do, what next.  That's why this forum works! 

Thank you ! xxxxxx0000 D


 
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