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Should I move my LO's room in nursing home?
My mother who has VD has been in a nursing home for 2 weeks now. For the first week she was in a 4 person room because the room that she was supposed to go in had a patient in there for respite care. When the week was over and it was time for her to move she didn't want to. I wanted her to be able to make a decision for herself. She doesn't mind the 4 person room. The other 3 people in the room don't talk to anyone. One lady does yell out most of the night and mostly swears. It really doesn't bother my mother. She says she likes the activity in the room. All of us in the family want her to move to the 2 person room. We can make it a little bit hers and organize the few things she can have there. Right now all her stuff is in bags. She does love her bags. In the 4 person room there is just not a lot of space to organize her things in. She says it will be too quiet in the new room. She is out of her room most of the day. She is just so confused about stuff. I want her to be with someone that can communicate with her but I don't want her to get depressed because there is not a lot of action in the room. I'm just not sure if I'm making the right decision to move her or should I let her make the decision even though she can't comprehend some things?
Well, this one takes a little evaluation.
Who would her new roomate be?
It's not really letting Mom make a care decision - but it IS about evaluating how the change would affect her.
You could just have her go to the new room for a night or two and make sure she is doing OK (wouldn't converse about it ahead of time, just try it). If she asks "they're cleaning it tonight". She may just say "OK".
If she squawks, go back to the old room (for now). Don't ASK her how it went - ask the staff. They'll be on the lookout if you ask them.
But at a certain point, my LO gave a "no" to virtually everything proposed - but did fine when we did what we needed to.
A 2 person room is certainly easier for you to visit in - a little more privacy. But, that is not worth it if Mom does not adjust well.
If she is not objecting to the room + she is safe there, why not just let her stay there?
Try not to project your feelings about how you would perceive the arrangement.