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Recent Alzheimer’s diagnosis
Posted: Monday, June 20, 2022 9:37 AM
Joined: 6/16/2022
Posts: 1

Good morning, my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s just last week. She lived alone up until her diagnosis and her doctor suggests assisted living for her.  I would like to take care of my mom instead of a facility option but the problem is I work full time and would have to give up my job to take care of her.  Is there financial assistance for family members that leave their job to provide full time care of their LO?  Would Medicaid pay a family member for her care in their home vs. an assisted living facility?
Posted: Monday, June 20, 2022 10:20 AM
Joined: 8/22/2020
Posts: 2498

Welcome to the forum, but so sorry for what you're facing.  This is a good place for support and advice.

Every state's Medicaid is different.  Some do offer some support for family members to keep a LO at home--but the pay is pretty meager, limited to the hours for "hands-on" needs and not usually for just supervision or "safety monitoring."  If she is living in your home, don't know whether you could be designated the "consumer-directed" paid caregiver (as opposed to one hired from an agency) or not.   These are also usually "estate recovery" programs, meaning that the state would have a lien on her assets after death to get some of their expenses back.

You may want to look at your state's regulations, and/or start looking at what assisted living facilitiies near you take Medicaid.  If she's not already qualified for Medicaid, you may need a certified elder law attorney to help you negotiate how to get her qualified.  CELA's are listed by location at

Good luck.

Posted: Monday, June 20, 2022 10:29 AM
Joined: 3/6/2017
Posts: 3648


Hello and welcome to the best board nobody wants to join. I am sorry for your reason to be here but glad you found us.

It would be really helpful for those wanting to answer this question to know your state and a little about you and your mom. You could put it here or fill in your profile.

Long story short, a CELA is really the only source for reliable information on any funding that might exist in your state to assist paying for care and whether than funding can be used to pay a family member and under what circumstances. Many states specifically prohibit this.

You can find a CELA here-

National Elder Law Foundation (

It is generally not recommended that a young person exit employment to be a caregiver as this will impact your career trajectory, will end work-sponsored health insurance/benefits and investing for your own retirement. 

Many live-in caregivers continue to work and use a day program or aides to keep their LO safe. In addition to allowing a CG to progress in their career and save for retirement, it helps avoid the social isolation of 24/7 caregiving.

This might look different if you are say, close to retirement age or already home parenting young children with a spouse making a family wage with health insurance benefits. 

Two other things to consider are than Alzheimer's progresses meaning that care needs will escalate over time and that that time could be 10 years or more. It's hard to plan around this disease. 


Just Kristi
Posted: Monday, June 20, 2022 4:09 PM
Joined: 6/20/2022
Posts: 2

Hello- I am sorry for what you and your mom are going through. I, too, am in the beginning stages with my dad's diagnosis. My experience is, naturally, limited, and not knowing where your mom is in her disease process, I'd like to suggest considering options for your mom between completely living alone and assisted living and you giving up your job. Once the doctor has clarified your mom's needs, then you can tailor her care to current needs and those anticipated in the near future. My dad has been living in a lovely independent apartment community for several years. At this point he can manage his own, daily care, with the pre-existing weekly apartment cleanings and dinner in the communal dining room. He can no longer drive and I have taken on supervision of his meds and finances. The next step for us will likely be hiring a now-and-again caregiver once some of his daily activities become problematic. Some of his neighbors have this arrangement. If it gets to the point that my dad requires round-the-clock care for his safety and well-being, I have already researched a nearby memory care home.

My point is that the needs of our LO are on a gradient, so, too, are the care options. I wish you, your mom and your family well. Peace be with you.

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